Hi I'm Zoey

Being social is still supremely strange to me. I sat for 3 hours in a coffee shop just chatting away and after I felt... good. Better, even. And that's completely new to me. While I did like spending time with some people before, afterwards I would always feel the need to just go home and do nothing. The brain fog. There was so much of it, more than I even realized. And I knew I had a lot of it back then also. But it made me so tired. It seeped into absolutely everything I did and made me tired from doing it. But it's gone. I haven't felt the brain fog once since I cracked. And I've been nothing but social. Talking, hanging out with friends, everything. It doesn't make me tired and I can't believe it isn't doing it anymore.

I also want to cry. There's things I really want to do but nobody I trust enough to do them with yet. I really need friends now. That's also new to me. Before I never felt like I needed someone, possibly because I did my best to push those feelings away, which was also very likely a cause of brain fog, but now I do. I really need people. When I panicked last week? More than anything I wanted someone to talk to. I wanted someone to just please help me. And luckily I found someone. But it was very strange.