How writing helps me
I write books, not to show to anyone or to publish or anything like that, but I enjoy writing and so I write these stories for myself. I don't think that I am a good writer but sometimes I do think that I am not that, of course other times what I write is complete trash. Anyways writing these stories helps me express my anxiety and depression since I don't talk about it to others. Since writing is my only way to get out these emotions most of my stories include a character with one of these problems. I do this so that I can truly explain my problems to the fullest detail I can without letting people know that the words on these pages are describing me and my mind.
Though I don't share these stories with anyone I thought since I am anonymous I could share something about one of my stories. This paragraph that I will show you was from a book that I have not yet completed. Since I was not planning to share this with anyone it probably isn't that great.
Why do I feel all these things why am I Lost. Stranded. Stuck. And Abandoned.This is what happens. This is what I feel. What happens in my head. This is my anxiety. This is me. I have anxiety, I have depression. I try to be happy. I try to hide it but I can’t, I just can’t. Why do I feel a need to hide it, would they accept me if I didn’t or would I be left alone, again? Why do I feel alone, like I am in the middle of the ocean drowning. lost. terrified. Alone. Why are these the things that I feel? Why can’t I feel happy? Instead I feel lost and alone. When it happens I can’t breathe I can’t see I am stranded with nothing and I just can’t get to the top of the water. Why is this me? Why am I like this?