Opinions and Cancel Culture
Earlier this morning I had already written down at least half a decent post's worth of my opinion about the term “Filipinx” – on how, as a former Mainland-er, I doubt I'll ever understand the real essence of it, but at the same time find it surprisingly relatable in terms of holding on to a personal cultural identity and narrative I can hold on to while I no longer have my feet planted firmly on my hometown.
I had all these ideas built up, stopped to take a quick break and to work on actual work-work, and then when I came back to my draft, read it once and deleted it. Poof. Gone.
Folks, that is my problem. I wish I could come clean and tell you exactly how many times I've done this, but it's happened so many times that I've lost the exact count. I start this whole rant and inner monologue about an opinion I have but I start to get cold feet and, ultimately, erase every single word into oblivion. I fear that my opinion in the matter is not valid. That I have no additional point to make, so maybe I should keep my mouth and thoughts shut. Sometimes I fear that my opinion is flimsy, and if called out (or worse, cancelled), I won't be able to recover. I know full well that W.a is probably the safest space my thoughts and opinions could ever be in, and discourse does happen in a better, more constructive way, but I still live with that fear.
I'm no coward, but I know my emotions are fragile. Heck, people forget that people are humans once they start hiding in anonymity and in numbers, hurling one destructive comment after the other. I don't have a lot of faith in how most people use the internet, and most of the time I have chosen to lurk rather than to actively participate because of that exact reason. But this is the internet – anything I put out here is “receipts”, and modern-day society has developed sleuthing skills that could land them a career in the FBI.
I guess another thing for me to overcome in my writing journey? Sounds about right.