Flat Mountain Dispatches



Ummon said to his monks, “I don't ask you about anything up to the fifteenth of the month, but say something for after the fifteenth.” Because no monk could reply, he answered himself, “Every day is a good day.”

Comment: is the next day the sixteenth? absolute rubbish the whole thing is itself
it's impossible to say anything for after the fifteenth so what does he know what do you know about every day?   four then seven eight thirty blows!

Note | Blue Cliff Record: “[Ummon] set down a question to instruct his community, 'I don't ask you about before the fifteenth day; try to say some­thing about after the fifteenth day.' He cuts off the thousand distinctions, and doesn't let either ordinary or holy pass. He himself answered for everyone, 'Every day is a good day.' The words 'before the fifteenth day' already cut off the thousand distinctions; the words 'after the fifteenth day' also cut off the thousand distinctions.”



Ummon once said: “Monk Sei declared that if we strike the empty air, it makes a sound, and that a piece of wood when hit, makes none.” Ummon struck the air with his stick and cried “Ouch!” and struck the floor and said “Hear anything?” A monk said, “A sound!” Ummon exclaimed, “Duffer!” and struck the floor again and asked “Sound of what?”

Comment: all sound is one sound and one who says it isn't must drive into it in order to so say

  one hand beats the air a bird in flight a flight in space a space in time a time in images imagery in mind mind in hand one mind beats the hand



Ummon said to the head monk in the hall, “Tell me, are you the same as the universe or different?” “The same” said the head monk. “All living things, moths, butterflies, ants — are you the same or different?” “The same” said the head monk. “Why do you fight with them?” asked Ummon.

Comment: describe your condition their condition don t describe name don t name listen

  don t understand understandunder and wonder


Last line/first line using the Ummon-kan as a base. Re-arranged in bash with a python script > re-compiled on an Olivetti Roma.

#ummonkan #z #typewriter

08. DEAF

A monk asked Ummon, “What man on earth can understand Buddhism?” Ummon answered, “The outside post of the temple can understand it!” and with a “Kwatz!” added, “You dead toad!”

Comment: see the dead toad jump what is all this about insentients preaching buddhism any way

never mind about buddhism if you understand this understand ummon understand the outside post then you can understand ummon the outside post and buddhism any way

press your ear against the post here hear someone humming in the temple



One day Ummon asked, “How can we make our religion proper?” Answering himself, he said, “Moo!”

Comment: why did he answer himself or again chewing grass all day looking up as you please what do you expect all the same ummon or the bull is singleminded when it comes to propriety

is a lack of propriety proper to any religion worth the name

  rise sun pale set sun deep

sun pale rise sun deep set  

com plete ly dif fe rent



A monk said to Ummon, “I ask you master, to deliver a learner from darkness and illusion quickly!” Ummon said, “What's the price of rice in Joshu?”

Comment: what indeed not that it matters who joshu is price cost value and rice they should not be confused one with another

  name the price calculate the cost estimate the value eat the rice    
change your mind mind your change



Ummon asked a monk, “Did you hear the long-beaked birds preaching Zen in Kozei, Konan?” “No, I didn't,” replied the monk.   Ummon raised his staff and said, “Zen!”

Comment: long beaked bird zen is extremely difficult to hear but is very easy on the ear if you use the eyes even with an ummon shouting and waving his stick

  birds are flying still over water before sunset



Ummon asked a monk, “Where have you been lately?” He answered, “With Saizen.” Ummon asked, “What does Saizen have to say?” The monk extended both arms. Ummon slapped him. The monk expostulated, “I have something to say!” Ummon extended both arms. The monk was dumb. Ummon struck him.   Comment: dishonesty is rewarded but as it turned out even if the monk were truthful both were lying the one violently the other peaceably it is impossible to choose between such a pair of scoundrels but try extending your arms

  ummon strikes a monk explodes after all there was no one there



A monk said to Ummon, “If a man kills his father, kills his mother, he may repent before the Buddha. If he kills the Buddha, kills a patriarch, where can he repent?” Ummon answered, “Quite!”   Comment: Mumon says that a man who understands Joshu's “Mu” will cut down a Buddha kill a patriarch if either offer him any obstacle There are lots of ways to kill a Buddha or a patriarch but only one will do

  death breaks like a wave down amongsthe pebbles and the small stones