foamflower

EXTREMELY ROUGH DRAFT

Let's take a good faith, charitable stance here. Let's steelman playing devil's advocate, and then discuss where it falls short, and how one can advocate for the infernal lord better.

The Phenomenon

I'm having a conversation with Bob about police violence. I say it's bad. He retorts:

Sure, it's definitely bad. But just to play Devil's Advocate, aren't most police pretty good?

A hunger for nuance

My argument is that a lot of people reject what feel like un-nuanced claims that violate their worldview. There are two parts here:

Part 1: Emotional rejection

It's hard for anyone to change their views in such a way that shakes the foundations of their beliefs. They want acknowledgement that they weren't completely wrong, that their ignorance is forgivable, that they're still grounded in a reality that makes sense to them. They want to be seen, respected, and acknowledged as opinion-havers and thinkers. This often comes out as an intense need to be partially disagreeable, so you are forced to concede that they're in part correct too.

How to defuse

If someone seems to be coming from this standpoint, there are two things to do. One, give them space and time. Acknowledge that you hear their point of view then leave them alone for a while. They'll often come around.

Part 2: Nonemotional rejection

This comes from a more meta-level concern: that the argument they're hearing seems to be ignoring a lot of edge cases. ACAB is illegible to a lot of smart people because they don't understand exactly what it means beyond the acronym itself. They don't have the cultural experience to parse it as a nuanced symbol, rather than a blanket statement about people they might know who are cops. This can happen for tons of different causes. Think about all of those (men and women) rallying behind “not all men”. I don't think these people are evil. I think they're just missing the point because they're getting worked up about arguments nobody is making. You could even say they're getting worked up on principle.

How to defuse

Acknowledge the nuance kindly! Show them that there's thought put into these things. That they have depth, that they allow for corner-cases. That complicity can vary, that all cops are no equally bad.