Anxiety. Arrived in Rio. Had a good first night and morning. Apartment is awesome. Got up early to do Crossfit. Visited Parque das Lages. B was very happy. I think I expressed a little too much anger in the past 2 days. Churrasco yesterday morning – yelled as I dropped the bottles. Pretended I hurt myself more than I did. Packing the bags – yelled because it wasn't fitting in properly. Today – got frustrated because it was hot. Now my mind doesn't feel like it's working properly. Vish... 15:00. Still time for rest of day. Calma. Don't even have appointments for the next hour and a half. Take off shoes? Or at least loosen them? Good idea. Yes sir. Better. Now, I was dehydrated when I had a piss. Time to drink all my bottle of water and refill it. Wow that's a lot of water. Ok. Now, loosen up the above textblock. Make it more easy to read.
Anxiety.
Arrived in Rio. Had a good first night and morning. Apartment is awesome.
Got up early to do Crossfit.
Visited Parque das Lages. B was very happy.
I think I expressed a little too much anger in the past 2 days. Churrasco yesterday morning – yelled as I dropped the bottles. Pretended I hurt myself more than I did. Packing the bags – yelled because it wasn't fitting in properly. Today – got frustrated because it was hot.
Now my mind doesn't feel like it's working properly.
Vish... 15:00. Still time for rest of day. Calma. Don't even have appointments for the next hour and a half.
Take off shoes? Or at least loosen them? Good idea. Yes sir. Better.
Now, I was dehydrated when I had a piss. Time to drink all my bottle of water and refill it. Wow that's a lot of water. Ok.
Now, loosen up the above textblock. Make it more easy to read.
That helps.
What is stressing me out?
Modafinil? Yes – this causes a state of alertness. Great for narrow-minded problem solving. Bad for anxiety.
Getting up early, caffeine? Yes and yes, probably this affects me too.
Meetings that I don't know I have, fear of missing meetings. FOR SURE.
FOMO: Missed opportunities of meetings during this week. Yes.
My cough. Persistent for more than 2 weeks. Covid? Smoking induced lung cancer? Are palheiros worse than cigarettes?
My acne. It's getting worse and it feels like there's no solution. Why didn't the damn antibiotics kill it?
My smell. I didn't change shirts after a long time walking outside. I'm sweaty and I can smell myself which means that others can, right?
Money. I already have much less than the 20.250 in tax savings I need to have this month. Feck... and this trip is already proving to be expensive. B's haircut will set me back almost 2k.
Leaving my company: do I or don't I? (Lol this should be an easy question. Stick around and go under the radar. They've got more than enough money now to keep me on. No one suffers if I stay on and don't produce much – or at least, I'm a drop in the bucket.)
Nothing else I can think of.
Let's resolve them!
- Modafinil & caffiene: wait it out or drink water. Time to get that refill... done.
- General anxiety:
don't think I can do a beach walk today unlessnope I absolutely can. Not now but 17:15. Cool. - Hunger: go out now. Come to think of it maybe go to beach too!
... got a salad. I can even make my meeting now. Wow... eating DRASTICALLY reduces my anxiety. Maybe that's all I needed all along. Lol.
Meetings I don't know I have: check my schedule, check E's schedule, mark down other commitments I have this week (like clothes shopping), and mark down open slots that I want to fill.
FOMO: Use the above open slots to schedule meetings. Make a big reachout (use the contact list spreadsheet) and the pre-filtered telegram list to get a shortlist of contacts and make a reachout to each one.
My cough: Use medicine for now, and if it persists, schedule a doctor visit when I get back home. I am due for a doctor checkup anyway. Asked for recommendations.
Acne: I got one recommendation of a dermatologist but she's more than double price the one back home. Maybe she's worth it? Don't know? Anything I can do to reduce symptoms? Stop using soap and moisturiser, just wash with water? Or should I eat the $50 extra.
My smell: already solved by putting on a clean hoodie.
Money: let's do the calculations now.
- Tax -20.250+9.000 = -11.250 to make up.
- +650 Pix
- -2.500 Rio budget (around 420 a day)
- -2.000 B haircut
- -2.000 SP budget (around 360 a day)
- -3.780 rent and utilities
- -1.750 dental resins
- -600 permanent dental plate
- -500 Dental consults
- -1.500 B's teeth glue-in
- -800 dermatologist consults and meds
- +20.000 salary after exchange fees (assuming 2% loss)
- =6030 shortfall
- Take out of tax savings: 14.220 remaining, 6030 shortfall.
It's not the worst but not the best either.
Ok gotta call coming back soon.