day one of 6 day work week. not sure how i am feeling this morning other than i might have pushed myself too much yesterday trying to get things done. i moved alot of things and tried to make the house a little more presentable. its coming but like anything with me it will take time.

day 4 now. i was just too tired to write anything. i was too tired to even think. tonight i will be in bed early and hopfully get a better amount of sleep. today is also 4 months since brent died. it will be another hard day. i will keep it all to myself. i started a quilt right after brent died. its theme is hearts. all 5 in blocks. it will be dedicated to him when done. it has really helped me keep my mind off the fact he is gone forever.

i finished my grief themed card on the weekend. lots of likes on it but no trades. thats ok , i think i will be making them more for me than anyone else. i think now my creativity if finally coming back. slowly. but its coming back. when my friend ruth died suddenly , i lost my creativity then too. so i knew it would come back. just did not know when.

i have been brushing the bunny, he looks pretty sad with only half a brushing. when he stops running from me again i will try and brush him a bit more. i dont think he likes the feel of the brush much but it has to be done or he will be covered in matts.

my pain meds are kicking in. its the few minutes in the day when my pain is at its lowest. i revel in this time. it soon will be time for breakfast and to leave for work.

i have a pick up after work. something to add to my teacup collection.

it is the next day and i am tired as always. i never seem to be able to get my shit together. my mind is so foggy all the time. if i dont write stuff down i forget. so i carry a small book with me all the time at work. i keep notes and lists and reminders.

i did some work in the garden today. did some weeding for about an hour. planted some iris i saw on the side of the road no one wanted. no idea what colour it will be. i gave some to my neighbour for her garden too. i will try and remember to plant the sunflower seeds tomorrow.