its overcast and cloudy. supposed to get lots of rain today. but the heat is much lower and i think the humidity has broken. so the house will cool down a bit and wont feel so oppressive even with the fan on.

i did some watering even though it may rain. i have to be careful weeding as i almost fell forward into a flower plant as i lost my balance. fibro sucks. i loose my balance a lot with this disease. i have to be careful when doing things such as climbing the step stool. i do that to get things from the top shelf. sometimes i can use the long tongs but not always with something heavy.

getting back to the topic of friends. i never had many friends in school. i thought i had one good friend who i could count on, but shortly after my oldest son was born she suddenly stopped talking to me. i called her sister once and she didnt know why either. so that is one mystery in my life that will never be solved.

i never met many people when my ex and i where moving around so much. i didnt notice it at first. it was only when we stopped moving i discovered i had no one to write to about my new life here. i often thought it was better to not make many friends as then it would not hurt so much moving. it took 2 years after moving here before i met anyone i would enjoy spending time with. in time we became very good friends , a lot of people mistook us for sisters. she died suddenly from a stroke and she was only 55 years old. i grieve for my sister every day. she understood my head and my heart.

i truly believe my ex was happy i was home and very much alone. our first move was 2000 miles from home. i was very much isolated and felt abandoned. he was gone all the time and i was left to figure out what to do with myself during the day. i had one cat at the time to keep me company and no friends or family close by. there was no such thing as internet at the time so it was just letters or the once in a while phone call.

although my first move was 40 yrs ago it still does not take away from the fact that a lot of military wives were left to there own devices to sort out life in a new city.....