my first mothers day without brent. even if the kids where not here at least brent was. i just feel sad and unloved, not worthy anymore. i know i am not the only one alone today for whatever reason. it is just hard and i feel forgotten.

so i spend this morning watching my show till 11 and cutting out little bits of fabric for the quilt. i will have lots to work to do on it when i am done. i got the next square set up for my take along box.

i need to get some housework done and of course clean the aviary. if it warms up i might try and do some more weeding. its a never ending job. i am paying for what i did yesterday. i tried to be careful and not overwork myself but it still hurts. i am the only one now to get stuff done.

so i have been moving things around in the house. i guess so it does not remind me so much of brent. will be hard to donate his things but what else am i going to do with them. i cant keep them forever just taking up space.

i have a huge headache today. i was hoping it would go away after i got up. no such luck.

i am also moving things around in the sunroom too. i have set up a work area and will set up the ironing board out there too. being as no one is allowed to come over it does not matter how i do things now.

it is just me and my zoo.