sunday and its partly sunny and still cold. brent took me out for breakfast. we ate it in the car but still a treat to get out.
i am terrified of driving right now. it is because my eye failed while i was driving the last time and i was on my way to a client. my left eye needs a cataract removed so not in the best shape right now.
i lost interest in doing anything. knitting , drawing or anything....i just sit and stare at a screen...or do housework... or declutter. tues we are going to be dropping stuff off at value village. so will be getting out then too. i am so sad its all i can do to get out of bed. yesterday while out i had to stop myself from crying. i was wondering how i was going to do this alone soon.
when i lived with my ex our first move was to the east coast. almost right after we got there he left . i was alone to unpack and find my way around the city. i had to do the shopping alone and i didnt drive yet so it was walk or take the bus. i had no clue what i was doing. i was 21 newly married and alone. no idea what was expected of me other than not to go out anywhere except to buy food and pay bills. i had one cat at the time, sam. he was orange and white. good cat but i should have known when he didnt like my ex much. animals know good people and bad people. i guess i am really good cause animals gravitate towards me where ever i go. i am so very broken but i guess animals can sense this and maybe they want me to know i am good.