lovelybel<3

just some writing+ venting :)

Today was parent teacher conferences, my grade aren't terrible but they aren't enough for my parents to be proud of. Im use to not being enough for my parents, no matter the circumstances I could always do better than I did before. Ive been trying my hardest to keep my grades up but I feel like giving up any moment. My parents constantly push me harder and harder each day, which to some is something good. Its exhausting though knowing I'll leave my parents dissatisfied. I always try to make them proud but nothing works. They always compare me to my friends and its just infuriating. The second I defend myself they say Im being rude and talking back, but from my point of view Im just speaking out on their bullshit. Not only that but I know something that could destroy my family. Ive known it for years, I found out originally on dads iPad.. god bless younger me. Ever since then Ive always had the verge to expose him, rat him out, but I can't. As much as my family annoys me, I can't just destroy it. Who knows what would happen to me if they didn't believe what I would say. So far now, Im gonna just let the secret die and see what happens with that.

One day I'll let the secret out.

2/22/2022