Winter Child
Tags : Mention of murder, Canon Character Death, Smoking, Drinking, Drugs, mental issues, self harm, Ghost?
Why did everyone ignore me?
Kisaki always wondered, what he did that made everyone near him seem to ignore Him. Everyone used to listen to him. But not anymore.
Especially Hanma
It's really bothering him. Hanma used to listen to him and follow him like a Puppy. Obeying everything Kisaki tells without question. But now? Hanma is just as lost as him.
His hair is growing like vines. Greasy one. His eyes puffy, probably too much drinking or crying, Kisaki was unsure. His breath barely smells like food he just ate. Most of the time, it just smells like nicotine.
And he hurt himself sometimes
Kisaki had to yell at him and make him stop. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Most of the time, Hanma just bangs his head to the wall or just inhales some drugs. Only God knows what it is.
“Hanma stop it! stop hitting yourself”
Kisaki tried to stop him, pulling his pale cold hand to stop hitting himself. Seeing Hanma like this makes Kisaki's heart ache. Hanma might only be just his pawn, his tools to reach his goals. But Hanma willingly following him makes Kisaki's heart open a bit. Only for him.
That day was different
Kisaki visit Hanma. He looks more fresh. Kisaki assumes he just showered. His clothes are in good condition, not to mention smells good too. His cheeks were a bit flushed. Not pale like how usual Hanma everyday.
“Hey, where are you going?” Kisaki ask.
Hanma didn't answer. He just sighs and walks past kisaki. Ignoring him. As usual. Kisaki shrugs. And started following Him wherever he wants to go.
“You're usually talkative. Why are you so quiet these days?” Kisaki ask again.
Hanma just giggle. Creep Kisaki a little bit.
Such a strange Man
Hanma stopped by at a bakery. Bought some cake. A birthday cake.
“Huh? A birthday cake? Is it your birthday? Or you have a significant other or something?” Kisaki ask.
Hanma, again, ignoring Him. Light his cigarette and puff the smoke away. Staring at the sky.
“The sky looks very clear today” he finally says.
“Yeah… but it's still winter tho” Kisaki said
“It won't be that cold” said Hanma.
“Are you sure about that? I thought you hate colds?”
Hanma giggled again. “Nah, you like cold. Don't you Kisaki?” He said. Still staring at the sky.
“To be honest I like summer more. But maybe because I'm a winter child, the cold doesn't bother me that much”
Hanma nods. Inhaling smoke from the cigs “sure… you're a winter child after all”
He then started walking. Kisaki follows him calmly. Don't know where he's going to be. But Kisaki is still following him.
Then they arrive in the cemetery. Kisaki is kinda confused. “Wait? Who are you visiting? Baji? There's no way you are visiting that kid right?”
Hanma doesn't answer. He just kept walking. And then sat in front of a gravestone. Put a can of beer, the cake, and burn some incense.
“It's been awhile doesn't it? I'm surprised your grave is clean as usual. Your family must be paying a lot for the keeper to keep your gravestone clean”
Hanma brushes some snow on the grave. Still smoking. Staring at the giant block In Front of him.
“I miss you… well, this is a secret between us okay? Don't tell anyone”
Hanma sniffed. Tears start falling down slowly from his drowsy eyes.
“I miss you… I'm sorry I left you alone with that bastard. I suppose to stay beside you… so you'll be here with me. I know you wouldn't mind living a fugitive life with me…”
Hanma sobs harder. It is not usual for Hanma to cry. He usually doesn't care about any humans. But right now, he just broke down into tears.
“I miss you… i Know it's impossible to wish for your comeback… but i do… I really wish you would come back… come back to me …”
He wipes his tears with his sweater. Sobbing harder.
“I should say this sooner… I love you… I know I'm just a tool for you, and I know you only love Hinata… but I love you…”
He lights the candle on top of the cake. And opening the can of beer.
“Happy birthday Kisaki”
Kisaki froze. He was speechless from the moment he saw the name on the gravestone.
Kisaki Tetta
What does it mean?! Is he dead?! How?! When?! Kisaki confused.
Kisaki saw the time of death on the block. Then he remembers, it was the Day he killed Izana, and almost killed Takemichi.
Now he understands
Why is everyone ignoring him? Why Hanma ignores him. He was a ghost. Wandering around the world, unable to pass. He doesn't know why he's dead. He is just a confused little ghost.
Kisaki cried. He can't believe he's now not existing in the world. He doesn't understand why. He looks at Hanma. Hanma must be suffering a lot after his death.
“Hanma… I'm sorry…” Kisaki sobs. Hugging Hanma with his ghost form. Sure Hanma wouldn't feel it. He will ignore it like usual because Kisaki is now just like a cold wind that blows his hair.
“Hanma… I'm so sorry…”
Hanma sobs harder. Grabbing his aching chest. His heart feels like being stabbed by a pin. Kisaki hugs him tighter.
“Happy birthday my love, my Wonderful winter child…”
Kisaki cries. He whispered to Hanma's ear “Thank you, I love you too… thanks for everything Hanma… I'm sorry i can't be with you and living the best life we always dreamed about”
That day, Hanma felt something warm hugging him all day. He doesn't know. But he feels safe. He's hoping it was Kisaki's warmth that embraced him.
Luckily, It was indeed Kisaki