expressions of absurdity.


Remember me?

I guess it doesn't matter if you do or don't.

Would I even care if so? Does it really matter to me if some strangers online recognize my fake online screen name where I throw out some random and useless thoughts here and there?

It's been a while since I've been here. A few months, actually. So I guess the 'here and there' is really less of here, but more way over there in the distant past. I was writing on here daily for a while, and then abruptly stopped. I have no clue why, really. It's one of those things where you miss a post and then, I'll write something tomorrow and pour my fucking soul out and it'll be so wonderful and beautiful and refreshing and fulfilling.

Then tomorrow comes, and you don't write anything. It gets pushed out again with the excuse being how busy you are, or how tired you are, or how uninspired you are, or how you'd rather watch some random movie and zone out completely instead of think about anything. And then again the next day. Then you find yourself sipping coffee months later on a slow Sunday morning, and you realize you haven't written anything in months. You notice a slight feeling of anxiety that has been building again, and a desire to... purge? Vent? Scream? Rant? And the only visual that accompanies those feelings, which would provide any sense of relief, is to sit at a computer and smash the keyboard like a pissed off monkey trying to showcase his entire soul through the act of written words. And you think that maybe, just maybe, the outlet of writing is something that actually benefits you in some small way. It may not be noticed at the moment of writing – the act itself may seem to be more of a drain and burden on you than a benefit. But after time, without doing that daily practice, it may be like a slow leak of a faucet that just drips away at your sanity, leaving a large mess after a while if not dealt with. A slow drip can carve out massive canyons in the hardest of rock, if given enough time.

I started handwriting in a notebook again, for a couple of days. And then, I just, kinda, stopped writing all together. It's not that I completely set aside the idea. Almost everyday I'm thinking about pulling open my laptop, sitting at my large desktop with multiple screens, or even just pulling out the pen and paper and starting to furiously write whatever comes up. But, that's when the perfectionist mind fires up its boiler and starts pumping steam throughout my mental system, filling every space with lively, overpowering and uncomfortable heat, which fuels the question that any blogger or writer deals with in some way, What's the point?

If one is able to set aside this question and pave through without slowing down or looking back, they're in a good place. If you pause, even for a split second, and give the slightest bit of attention to this thought, you're screwed. It'll destroy vast cities in your mental landscape, with rising death tolls of ideas and passions that couldn't be counted. Doubt and fear are nothing but one-way tickets to the slaughterhouse for ideas, dreams, and passions.

Plus, it's like a seed that gets planted in the mental gardens. And these seeds begin to grow, sprouting new life and begin spreading faster than you can trim it down. And with the rains of attention that saturate everything with life boosting nourishment, it quickly gets out of control. You get overwhelmed, feel defeated, and give up. Even if you really want to do it, and feel the need to do it, you are blocked.

Or, maybe it's just me.

I have several writing projects that I'd love to start working on again. It'd be nice to make progress with them instead of just swirling the ideas around in my head over and over, like some disgusting washing machine found in some poorly lit, slum city street. Why continue to only sit and watch clothes spin around and around? No clue. It doesn't do anything. I think I've been watching clothes spin for a lot of years. And not just any clothes, the same ones. Spinning around and around in the same dirty water. Who knows what disgusting mess is growing inside now.

Before I jump headfirst into various writing projects, in an attempt to check off a few items on the Goals for My Life list, (which does feature a few writing projects on there), I figured I should just get back into the habit of writing every day again. I may not post on here for this process. Maybe this will be the only one that is posted for months again, only to have me bounce back later and write another post on the failed attempts at writing. Oh, how absurd the cycle gets. But, it's a possibility. If not, I'll be using my Joplin digital notebook as a space for that. Or, the site, 750words, which I used years ago as part of a morning mental dump. To start, I want to do the daily mind dumps and just purge out whatever comes up. Let the kitchen sink drain a little, so I can get a better idea of the nasty mess that I'm dealing with. Then get to work.

We'll see how it goes.

We went camping this last weekend, and it was pretty awesome. We went up into the mountains Friday mid-morning, thinking that we would easily find a spot and beat the rush of bros heading up with their trailers and toys. Boy, were we wrong. Just about everywhere was taken, and there weren't many spots available – at least the good ones. We drove around for a while scouting out different spots, as I browsed my Gaia GPS app, where I had marked a bunch of potential spots that I scouted out using satellite maps.

Gaia is an awesome GPS/map app, if anyone is interested. It's not perfect, as it's not the most easy to use and understand, and it has a bunch of quarks. But after investing some time in the app to learn how it works, how to layer different maps and information, you can begin to customize something that works well. Plus, being able to download everything to your phone, so you can view your saved areas offline, is essential, and the main reason I got the app. It's $40/year, and I was hesitant for a while, but now I love it and feel it's totally worth it. Sometimes I just sit and browse the maps and set waypoints for different areas we could potentially camp. Within 2 hours of us, we have hundreds of spots. Within 5 hours of us, we have 7+ major national parks, a handful of state parks, and hundreds of miles of mountain range to explore.

I got a little stressed out while we were zipping around different roads looking for a great camping spot. It was my own expectations that set me up, really, as I wanted a perfect spot that was beautiful, near water, isolated, instead of something that was open, without many trees, and near main roads. But sadly, those “not so good” type of spots were all we were finding. Plus, it really is a race. The later it gets, the more people are heading up into the mountains, and they're looking for spots too. So at some point, you just have to settle for what you can get and be happy.

We found a wonderful spot that was tucked down a very rocky dirt road. It was secluded and would have been great. But my dumb ass decided that we would try one other area that I had marked on the map, and if that wouldn't work, we would come back to take over the area we just found. Well, stupid me. We went to check the other area out, and it sucked. So we went back to the area we left, and when we got there, someone else had found it and was already starting to set up. I felt so stupid and disappointed. We eventually found another spot, but I wasn't in a great mood. I was really disappointed in myself. I guess I had a lot of hope and expectations for the weekend trip and felt that I hadn't pulled it off. Tits McGee seemed wonderful though and thought it was all beautiful.

I moped around for a while, unimpressed with the spot we snagged. But as we started setting up and making it a home, my mood lightened and I began to open up to the beauty of the area. It was mostly exposed and open, but we did have some trees next to us, and we were isolated. We had great views across the top of other mountains as well.

Just as we finished setting up our tent, it started raining. And then, it started pouring. Thunder was booming all around us and it was so loud as it echoed off the mountains surrounding us. I absolutely loved it. As the new tent is 10'x14', we had plenty of room to have our beds, our chairs, a table, and were set up pretty nicely. The sound of the rain coming down was epic, as it hit the tent. It's so relaxing. I love it. We sat in the tent, having snacks, listening to the rain, peeking out the windows to watch the downpour, reading on our iPad and Kindles, and just giggling about nothing.

It rained for a few hours, which I didn't mind. I am completely content in doing nothing, and just being with my own mind in the quiet. Tits McGee is ok for a while, but then gets a little restless and wants to get up and do things. As the rain stopped for about 10-15 mins, she got up and went for a quick walk, but quickly had to run back when the rain picked up again. It was dark by then, and we were getting a little tired. So we opted to get cozy in the tent and watch a movie on my phone. We watched, 1917. Romantic, right?

The next day it was sunny and warm, and the bugs were out in full swing. That wasn't so much fun. We walked around the area to explore and take in the views and enjoy the quiet. You could hear bros and their toys out zooming around everywhere, but we were far enough away it wasn't bad at all.

Tits McGee came back from a walk and pointed out how more storm clouds were coming in. She asked if I preferred to sit through more rainstorms, or if we should just head home (we were only about an hour and a half from home). I was fine staying. I love the rain. I love camping. And I didn't want to go back to society and people and the heat. It was about 70 degrees, in the sun, where we were. Back home, it was 103. I opted to stay and just chill. Enjoy the zen life in the mountains and just take it easy. She said she was fine with that too. But, she mentioned it another time or two, and I got the hint that she wanted to go home. As much as I didn't want to, I offered to pack us up and head home, where we could just chill there. It was clear she didn't want to sit through hours of rainstorms in the tent again. So, after a few deep sighs of sadness for having to pack up and leave after only a day, I got started on packing us up.

Just as we got the car loaded, and we were pulling out, it started raining again. While driving back, I kept an eye on the temperature reading. When we left, it was about 68. When I pulled back home, it was over 100. And of course, when we got home, Tits McGee said she wished we would have stayed. Ha! I didn't want to get sucked into that trap of saying, “WTF! But you're the one that wanted to leave!” Sometimes it's just better to nod, smile, and let things be.

More later.


Tits McGee was pretty excited to get into the mountains last night. When I got home from work, she had food ready to go for us, which we scarfed down rather quickly – delicious pasta and veggies in a vegan cheese sauce. We quickly loaded up our packs, grabbed our gear, and hit the road.

She wanted to try out her new water filter, so we went to an awesome spot that's flat, loaded with trees and shade, and right next to the river. The drive up was ok. My car is shaking a little now when I apply brakes, so I guess I just need to tie a noose and hang myself. I've changed my breaks before, and know how to do the rotors as well, but I'm a procrastinator and put things off constantly. I'm still annoyed with my car after the battery issue the other day. I need to sell my car and upgrade to a truck that would be better for all the adventuring I do.

The drive through the canyon was beautiful as always. You immediately feel the separation between the main city and society, and the welcome embrace of nature that says, “Welcome home, bitch.” We got to the location, which didn't seem to have too many cars. We were able to find a spot pretty quickly, which was odd, given how popular the area is. To get to the river, it's about a half mile hike down into the forest. It's a mostly flat walk, and you need to be on the lookout for bikers that are zipping down the mountain at fast speeds. But this time, there wasn't anyone. Even as we continued on towards the river, walking through the trees in a zig-zag pattern of the trail, there wasn't anyone there along the river. Usually there are several people set up with hammocks, teenagers causing all sorts of mischief, or people and kids just playing along the river. It was all empty. We wandered up and down the river a little to see where we wanted to set up. We finally found a father hanging out with a few of his kids that were playing in an easy flowing section of the river (most of it was still flowing very strongly and full of water from all the snow melt).

We found a lovely little area and set up our hammocks after measuring out the trees we wanted to use. You need a good distance between large, solid trees, that are able to handle your weight. Too close won't work. Too small of trees won't, either. But there were plenty of options around, so it was really a matter of how you wanted to lay: looking towards or against the river, or alongside it. I chose to lay in a way where I could view the area next to us, as I'm the security team, basically. If someone comes up, or an animal, I want to see it coming. Tits McGee set up right next to the river as close as she could get.

We lounged for a while and enjoyed the cool air, the shade, and the quiet, although the river was very loud. It was more difficult to talk between us, due to the river noise, so we mostly kept silent except for a few general comments here and there. I helped her get her new filter set up and ready to go. She loved it. We had a few drinks of cool river water and returned to our hammocks. There, we lounged for about an hour, just enjoying nature, enjoying thoughts, enjoying the solitude and the gentle breeze. I did some reading on my phone (The Hobbit), but mostly just enjoyed being in Nature. Great meditation time.

It was a wonderful evening. The sunset lit up the sky with a beautiful orange and reddish hue. And as the sun set further, the sky began to darken really quickly – the temperature began to drop quickly too. So, we packed up and made our way back to the car, and zipped home.

Most of the evening before passing out, I was marking up my Gaia Map app with areas we could possibly camp at. We want to get out again this weekend, and probably every weekend we can before winter hits. Winter is hibernation time and I just hide away for a few months.

More later...


Good golly gumdrops, what a crazy day it's been. My phone sounds like the inside of a casino, with its constant ringing and endless variety of tones that mean messages from different people or accounts. It's the “usual madness” for a Tuesday in our world of farming, so it's nothing really new. But, sometimes it just hits me how much is happening in so many areas – a constant flow of moving puzzle pieces that we somehow have to line up every week to make sure things flow smoothly, greens are sold, people are happy, and money is in the bank.

Even with the craziness of it, I still enjoy it. It's been a wonderful job and I truly feel blessed to be where I am. I don't miss the corporate or startup world at all.

Tits McGee sent me a message with pure joy just a few moments ago. I had secretly sent her a surprise package today with a new water filter device that you can carry around in your backpack, or attach to your hiking gear, etc. If you're curious on specifics, it's the Sawyer Squeeze Water Filter. You can find them just about anywhere now – even Walmart has them – and they're only about $30. As we hike and camp constantly, these little things are essential to have to collect and filter fresh water, if needed. Or even just to have in case of emergencies. It'll last a lifetime, without having to change filters or any silliness like that.

Sure, it's not the most romantic gift. But, she has wanted one and commented on it before, and good ol' Mr. Gr3y listens to things – sometimes, anyway. And gifts are best given at random, out of love, without expectations of return, instead of stupid holidays or because it's expected or assumed. I'm not into gifts or materialistic things, and like to claim that I'm an essentialist. This is where I'll invest in really nice things that I feel are important and worthy of having, but overall keep a pretty minimalist approach to just about everything. But sometimes things are worth getting and giving. I felt this was one of those things, and in the context of a 'just because' gift. You know, love and mushy stuff.

We're still planning on going hiking this afternoon, and lounging in the hammocks. I may start posting photos in these posts as well, in the future. And plus, now she can pull some fresh water from the rivers and have a nice cool drink. It makes it super nice. You can also attach those things to your water bag, or camelback, and have the water filter as you suck it through.

TMO (and just about anyone else that reads this): go hiking. Seriously. Slow as you go, if you need. Walk as though you're a quiet monk, with complete and total presence with every step. Even if you only get out a short distance, just stop and enjoy nature if nothing else. That's all I like to do, mainly. We hike up to somewhere and then just chill. Enjoy the quiet sounds of the wind, trees rustling, the river flowing, or whatever. It's extremely refreshing. Take water and snacks, maybe even a journal. Just be.

More later...


Hello friend. Go hiking.

The end.


P.S. Pack plenty of water.

I've already had two cups of coffee this morning, and I'm feeling the boost of caffeine that's lighting up my chest, and sending electricity through my veins, which is jolting me along the morning waves of focus and intention. It's a light roast coffee, so the caffeine level is a bit higher, and it is oh so yummy. I do add almond milk creamer, so I guess I'm not that tough of a coffee drinker. I can't do black coffee.

I've been working from home this morning, starting about 6:30 am. I just finished prepping and sending off payroll and getting a few tasks out of the way, so I can have a shorter day. I'll be heading into work shortly, so there's at least one boss there to just observe and nod with satisfaction at the progress of the day.

There are darker clouds in the skies today, which makes me have this crazy thought that maybe, just maybe, I can go hiking later today, and not have it feel like I'm wandering around the landscape of Satan's ass. I haven't hiked in a few weeks due to the intense heat (being 100+ degrees for many days in a row), and just other things going on. But, I'm in the mood to get out and wander the forest a bit, breathe some forest air, even though smoke has blown into my state from fires burning in other states, and making the air horrifically thick and gross. Plus, I want to just chill by a river, journal (just refilled my TWSBI Eco pen this morning) in a brand new Leuchtturm 1917 notebook, and overall, just chill and swing in a hammock. I'm sure Tits McGee would love to join as well. Chill life is the best life. Maybe we can do a quickie dinner in the forest, too.

I'm still reading, The Hobbit, and getting close to being finished. I think I started it Saturday? I need to read a book within the first few days, otherwise I get bored with it and will just move on. I'm not sure what is next, either. I downloaded the audiobook on YouTube, so I can listen to that while driving around and help me finish the last quarter of the book pretty quickly.

I bought more paracord last night. I don't know why, honestly. I have plenty already. I think I'm just in a gear obsession phase and going on a spending rampage. I'm also ordering a new camping table that has multiple levels, a built-in sink, several hooks for attachments, and folds down pretty small. This may be a smarter purchase that is actually needed, unlike ordering and collecting more rope that won't get used as quickly. Currently, we have a simple four-foot table that folds out. It allows room for our stove and a tiny prep area, but it'd be nice to have more room. It does get pretty tight rather quickly. The new table with offer at least double the surface space, while folding down to just about the same size as the current table.

I also saw someone on YouTube that has my same tent, and they bought a tiny projector that connects to your phone, and they were able to watch movies using the tent wall as their screen. It looked fantastic. So, I'm going to add that to my purchase list as well. I think it's nearly $200 though, which is a bit steep for the idea, but, I think it might be fun. Tits McGee would love it, and I would earn some, “isn't my boyfriend so g'damn cute and romantic” points, as we cuddle in the forest with gentle fairy lights inside the tent and a movie playing on the tent wall. Damn, I'm a genius. She doesn't know that I'd play something scary like, “The Forest”, and then I'd leave the tent and let her simmer in fear for a few moments alone as I hide behind some trees giggling. Karma is a bitch though, so I'd probably be the one to be killed by some ghost creature, a bear, or a Scientologist, or something.

On that note, I'm also ordering more solar lights that can placed around our campsite. Some are motion triggered while others just offer a gentle continuous light. It should be pretty nice. I was never into the idea before and thought of it as entirely unnecessary. But when we stayed with my friend down on his property, his wife had those placed around the camp, and it was pretty nice. You were able to get a quick visual of the camp site and find your way, without it being too bright or intrusive.

I'm just blabbing this morning, like most posts on here, I guess. Obviously camping and the outdoors is on my mind, and I clearly have a spending problem right now, but I'm excited to get out again this weekend, if we are able to make it. I'm pretty sure we'll be able to, even if we just go to the same place as this last weekend.

I better jet. But, more later, as always…


We decided to pack up our camp Sunday morning and head back home, to beat the heat and avoid the mosquitos and flies. We originally had intended to stay up in the mountains all day, and then return in the evening, but we were so sick of the bugs. All my zen-like nature was started to fade away, and total annoyance and irritation from the bug bites was starting to increase.

We packed up pretty quickly, taking note of what to do better next time as far as organization goes. I think I've already forgotten most of those notes, so that's fun. We started to head back home. We stopped and got some food first, as we were rather hungry.

Our cars were a mess, and completely covered in dust. So, we stopped at a car wash near our house. It's one of those spray-it-yourself types, which I don't mind. It's only a couple bucks, and it does well enough. I spray mine down as quickly as I could, and go to leave. But my car wouldn't start. It would click rapidly, but wouldn't turn over.


Adrenaline begins pumping, and the mindset of “oh fawk” kicks in.

I've had this happen before, so I immediately knew it was the battery. Tits McGee had just pulled out and left before I could wave her down, so I had to call her back to come help jump me. Her car is a hybrid vehicle, which has a big electrical system in it. But it turns out those vehicles aren't the easiest to jump another car with. I couldn't figure it out. We were even trying to look it up with our phones on the fly, but had no luck.

Finally, we decided to ask someone that was pulling out of the car wash bay if they wouldn't mind coming to give us a jump. And thankfully, the first guy we asked was that kind person. He pulled up, after we waited for him to finish spraying down his truck, and we got everything hooked up. I let it sit for a few seconds, and then go to start my car.


Tick tick tick, but it still wouldn't turn over.

Slight panic hits again. But, I decide to wait a few more seconds, figuring that maybe it just needs a little more juice.

I get out and thank the guy for helping us again, trying not to let my panic show.

I go back in the car and turn the key.

Tick tick tick.


We give it a few more tries, even adjusting the cables a few times as we weren't sure they were entirely connected correctly.

Tried again.


By now, Tits McGee is starting to get more anxious and nervous, and starts googling roadside assistance numbers to get more help.

Another guy shows up, and asks if he can help. And in exchange for any and all the manly points I have left, I say, sure. Please! He checks over everything and then pulls out another little box, which looks like a battery charger. We plug it into the first guys truck, and connect everything. We let it sit there for about 30 seconds. I go and crank it.


Now I'm starting to feel the weight of the feeling that can only be described as, “You, my friend, are completely fucked”.

I crank it over and over, hoping that it will just turn on. Still nothing. I sat in the car for a few minutes each time as well, and the heat was unbearable. Sweat was pouring out of me from

I get out, feeling totally fucked. Totally stressed. And just running through the next options in my head.

Do I call a tow-truck? Do I walk down the road to the Auto Zone and try to get a new battery and parts and fix it in the car wash parking lot? Do I even have tools with me?

The other two guys are chatting a little, talking in a manly-man language that I don't know. I just nod along as though I'm a real man that knows what he's talking about, knows cars, and claims “Camo” as my favorite color. I think they bought it – mostly.

I finally decide to tell them thank you for being kind in helping us, but we would probably have to call someone else and go another route. They start packing up everything, and wishing us the best. The whole time – maybe a couple of minutes – the battery charger device was still connected to my car, and running.

I go in the hot car, sit down, and start praying to every deity you can think of.

I turn the key...


It starts!

The car finally fucking started!

I sit there for a second, wondering if it really happened. The guys outside turn and look at me, and throw their hands up in the air with success and wonder, as if to say, “What the hell!? Now it works!?”

I leave the car on, of course, and hop out. We thank the men over and over. They are happy for us and feel successful! They pack up and leave.

Tits McGee and I make a quick game plan to head home, which was about 2 miles away. There, I would park, take apart the battery, then we'd go get new stuff, and return.

And that's basically what we did.

So, it wasn't the most fun of an experience to return to. It was crazy hot, and in my garage it was even more hot while I was attempting to take apart everything. The battery was in horrible shape, and the acid had eaten away the majority of the cable connections. I bought a bunch of new stuff, (which didn't really fit, but I made it work anyway).

The car fired up after I put everything back together. I tried it a few times. I felt happy again. I still was negative as far as manly-man points go, but I can fool my way through society again and regain some of those.

We unloaded the cars, showered, cleaned up, made some quick pasta and veggies, and crashed for the evening, exhausted.

More later...


I missed the internet.

We went camping this last weekend, which was amazing. It took us half a day, but we were able to find a wonderful little spot in the forest, surrounded by trees (which provided such wonderful shade). There was a lake about a mile down the road, which we could easily walk to. And a couple streams that were nearby, which kept a constant flow of deer and animal life hopping around.

We camped for 2 days – arriving Friday, and packing up Sunday. And for the majority of the time, we just sat and enjoyed the quiet. I read two books – well, one and a half anyway. I finished the last half of, 1984, and then read, The Hobbit. I read relatively quickly, in little spurts, but spread out from about 6am to about midnight each night. So I can get through a decent sized book pretty quickly if I really want to. I admit, I'm super picky and often times will abandon a book half way just because I lose interest or don't care anymore. Which is the same for just about anything in my life. I get interested, motivated, get deeply into it, and then just get bored and let it go.

It was very relaxing to be out there. There wasn't any phone signal, so phones were entirely useless. I used it for mapping and watching some YouTube videos I had downloaded about knot tying and some wilderness tips. Otherwise, it was mostly phone free. I can't say screen free because I read on my phone or Kindle, but, you get the idea.

I also did a lot of journaling, which was nice. I like doing mind-dumps, where you just sit and write the constant stream of consciousness that flows out, which is what I mostly do when writing here. I just start typing and flow with whatever comes up, usually everything is entirely unplanned.

Beyond that, we hiked a little (but damn was it hot without the shade), or just sat and enjoyed nature, and its stillness. We watched a lot of birds and their interesting patterns. My older brother joined us, and he had a bird app downloaded on his phone, so we were able to play sounds that matched the birds in the area, and drew quite a crowd and had some interested “conversations” going all the time.

The only thing that sucked on this quickie trip, was the flies and the mosquitos. They were pretty annoying, and even now I feel little itchy bumps all over me from where I was bitten. The bugs aren't fun at all and after a while, it can make my mood pretty sour. I'll still take the forest, and it's bugs, over the desert any day.

The new tent is awesome. I love that thing. I think I'll just dedicate this blog to the love of canvas tents now, as it has made and appearance in most of my recent posts. If you've ever stayed in a luxury tent setup where you had space to stand up, change, stay completely dry and bug free, while it remains pretty cute, you'll understand. It's about as close as you can get to a trailer or renting a cabin as you can get. Tits McGee added some cute little fairy lights all inside that provided just the right amount of soft light, so you could see everything inside, without it being too bright or obnoxious. We even have a solar light outside for the “front porch” area. Plus, I've ordered more that we can put around the campground in the future.

The nights were very cool and very relaxing. There are fire bans everywhere, so we weren't able to light a fire – which would have made everything even more awesome- but, we were fine without. I get tired pretty quickly when the sun goes down, so I wouldn't have lasted long anyway. I preferred to be in the tent, away from the bugs, and just reading and relaxing.

We're already thinking about where to go this coming weekend. The spot we stayed at would work very well again, and may just become a quick go-to for us if we want to get away for the weekend without having to drive too far. I think it was only about an hour and a half away from us, which goes by super quickly.

Next time, I'll be far better prepared for the bugs. Even going out to just meditate in the tent for two days would be worth it, for me anyway.

Also, side note: another latest obsession of mine is paracord. I keep buying more and more of it, in different colors, thickness, strengths – particularly reflective types. I'm kind of a gear nerd sometimes, with obsessive tendencies. When I get interested in something, I go all in and spend money on things, read about it, watch endless videos about it, and just go for it. But, I keep the survival skills on a constant refreshing rotation. You never know if it'll be needed, right? Plus, being able to rig up something on the fly is great too.

Everyone always asks me what I eat when camping, so I'll add a quick blurb on food now. I guess because I'm plant-based (vegan, although I prefer not to use the term that much), they don't understand what there is to eat when you're camping. Most people do meats of some kind, especially the horrifically carcinogenic “food” known as hot dogs. Well, guess what? Plant-based people can have sausages and hot dogs and burgers and all of that as well. They're fake, of course, and I choose not to eat those things, because they're not that great for you, but the option is always there.

The short answer is that we can make just about any meal we want while camping, except for something that requires “baking” in a controlled temperature, as it's a bit hard to do. But overall, anything we want to have, we can make. I've done some pretty cool things over a fire or with a basic stove. We love Mexican food, so rice and beans is always a favorite for us, rolled in tortillas, topped with veggies and whatever sauces we crave. Super quick, cheap, and very easy to make in the forest with a simple stove system (which I have several options on hand). We also do tons of veggies and make a stir-fry, or just to top on any meal. Curry is an easy one too. We even made lettuce wraps for lunch on this last trip with veggies galore, including guacamole, hummus, homemade sauces, seeds, nuts, etc. Pasta is another easy one to do, which we love to top with veggies and avocado. Overall, we try to add as many greens as we can to just about anything we eat, which is very easy to do, even when camping. One medium-sized cooler is plenty for us for a quick two-day trip.

Another favorite is what we call, tin foil dinners, where you cut up a variety of preferred ingredients such as potatoes, meats, veggies galore, seasonings and sauces, and roll them into a few layers of tin foil and throw it over the fire until cooked through. This is one of my favorite meals, for sure.

Overall, things aren't too different when we are camping, as far as food goes. I guess we eat pretty minimal anyway, which makes things super easy.

Well, I need to jet, but I'll write more later.



Well, what do you know, another day... another pointless post.

I've been super busy at the farm today, mostly doing admin work: sending invoices, sending order forms for next week, and having several meetings with various team members to make sure things are flowing smoothly. We've had quite a few staff transitions lately, and it's mostly gone well – just a couple kinks that need to be worked out. We had some issues with a few orders this week that were mixed up, which we had to resolve. Sometimes people just don't pay attention and screw up, and then it takes a lot of time and effort to get things resolved.

Overall, I'm feeling good about this week and ready to call it complete. I've got the weekend in my mind already. We are going to try to camp this weekend. This time somewhere local, near trees and water, hopefully. No more of that desert, melt-in-the-sun bullshit. And we're thinking that since it won't be a holiday weekend, where everyone went camping last weekend, we may have a pretty good chance of finding something awesome to set up for a couple of days. I'm excited to get another round in my new canvas tent. My brother bought the same tent as well, and he's wanting to join too, so we'll have a big canvas tent party in the woods.

Also, side note, I love canvas. Oh, man, do I love it. I love the vintage look and feel of it, and love the strength and longevity of it as well. I want to make my own adventure bags and other gear, and do my own brand. But, I don't know how to sew and don't have any of the gear to make things. I'd make bags that would last a lifetime with super high quality materials and hardware, with no breakable parts, with an over-engineered design. I just don't know how to pull it off.

If you or someone you know knows how to sew and create stuff like that, let me know, as I'd love to contract it out. I'll list my email below.

Anyway... I'm excited to camp this weekend and just chill. I think we'll try to do this every weekend we can, and plan another week+ long trip in September. We love going to the Redwoods in California, and we'll most likely go back there again. It's so magical. One of my most favorite experiences, ever. I love trees, and wandering those forests with those giant trees is beyond a spiritual experience for me. I love it.

Well, that's about it for now. I have a few more things to do, and then I'll call it a day and head home. Maybe some hiking tonight, even though it's 100+ degrees today where I am. It's horrible. I hate the heat like that, but there's plenty of mountains around me and I can get away pretty quickly. Maybe just lay near a stream in my hammock, meditate, read, write, and just be.

More later.



mrgr3y at protonmail dot com

Yo, tmo! All is well in my world. I hope you're doing well, too. Gotta love that morning coffee, right? Mmmm. I'm ready for more and nearing a lethal amount of caffeine, no doubt.

I enjoyed your post on the edge-of-grid in terms of privacy, and I agree with you. I think I'm pretty well on the edge as well. As you've probably done so too, I think there comes a point where we have to have a certain level of acceptance of the world and how things are, even if we don't agree with any of it. And that level of acceptance is to understand that true privacy is a thing of the past now. In some way, no matter how hard we try, we are a monitored society. And sadly, the intensity of that monitoring is only increasing. The waves and momentum of it are being driven and supported by the mass population, who desperately cling on to their online obsessions, such as Facebook, even in light of how horrific they are for us and the truth being fully exposed now regarding their true intentions and privacy violations. Even the courts of our government have come out and said that Snowden was right, the government has been spying on all of us, and it was, and still is, entirely illegal to do so. But yet, no one cares. They continue scrolling away and mindlessly liking endless amounts of pointless 'content', all so they can get through the jobs they hate and the lives they don't want to truly live. Social programming is an interesting observation.

I guess the only thing we can do is take all the precautions we can, and live intentionally with full awareness of what we're doing (online and off), and just try to be good humans. Sometimes simplicity does more than we think, especially in this digital age of fakery. Saying hello to someone, or offering a genuine compliment, can change a person's day way more than getting 50 phony likes on their latest selfie. Hell, maybe even taking time to offer food and conversation to someone that is homeless or in need can change the world, or at least their world. Possibly our own, too.

Either way, we're a part of this ride in some way or another. Even if we're just watching from the sidelines, not engaging in the chaotic tools of others, and how the world prefers to 'engage' with each other.

I do think people are starting to wake up more, though, and are becoming more aware of what is really going on. It's a slow process, but I think it's happening.