As I am revising my views on dialectics, as I am pondering upon my understanding of communism, I notice my limitations, I notice my reductions – I still strive for constants, I still cannot fathom the vast complexity, I want to make it smaller and easier to process. The solution is obvious – time. I, like most, need time to process, I cannot jump to the fullest possible understanding of communism right away, I cannot force my mind to skip all the necessary parts of this intricate process of dissecting the whole into its parts, again and again, until each particle is small enough to be examined under a microscope. And then, assemple it back again, put it back together, to see that the whole is always bigger than the sum of its parts, somehow. I often, too often skimp, penny pinch my time; faster, faster, screams my wounded inner child; we need to do it faster, that's how we prove we are capable, that's how we prove we are smart!.. And I see, again and again, that faster just plain and simple doesn't work – I jump to conclusions, I feverishly paint with the largest brush available, and I stumble, and I falter, and I make unnecessary overgeneralizations, and I simplify to the point of reduction. And I say, “Darn! I did it again! Too soon, too soon! I should have given myself the time, I should have!..” And yet again, I will stumble, I will rush, I will end up in a convoluted mess of half-heartedly conceived ideas, of half-processed truths and fully formed misgivings. So, why do I relate this to you today, this simple narrative, that can be reflected in one universal axiom – take your time, don't rush into conclusions? Well, as usual, I do not wish upon anyone the slight I have endured myself; I wish sincerely, to spare you this small grievance – please, my dear comrade, do not walk this unsteady path of wanting it all, and wanting it now. True knowledge, true understanding, WILL come, but you have to foster it, create favourable conditions, nurture it, and be patient. How boring, scream my insides, how banal! But, alas, tis the truth, nurture it, let the quantity expand into quality, or keep to the painful pattern of soaring high, and falling low.