A matter of loneliness
I don't have any real friends currently. At least I have my family, although my brother is pretty busy with his offspring.
I see my mother quite often. When she's away I experience times of intense loneliness especially on the weekends.
The thing is, I don't try to avoid the loneliness anymore. I could call up some people and probably meet them but I don't want to run away from loneliness.
I had been in a relationship for 10 years previously. And before that I was married so I didn't experience much loneliness when I was younger.
I found a method to deal with loneliness in a way that it doesn't affect me too much. It can suddenly come over me, that feeling of loneliness. It's not something I can control.
It's an aversion against being alone. The will is key. If I'm not conscious of this “negative” will I will get sad and depressed.
When I can dig out that aversion and really feel it, then the sadness leaves and after some time I can recover.
But that's not the only situation where this method is effective. I can pull myself out of a depression in many different situations.
It's always this anti-will that crops up suddenly and starts trying to take me over. All I have do to is to be aware of this, then the cycle will not continue.