Tips to Help Overcome Shyness and Social Awkwardness
Personally, I’ve grown up as a Shy person and have had been in several social awkward situations, which impacted me as I became an Adult. I wasn’t aware of any help that I could seek nor have access to any tips, which could have guided me. But as I got to a level of maturity, I began to self-educate me to overcome shyness and social awkwardness and its been a learning since. Feeling shy or awkward in certain situations is understandable. We all get nervous when we have to talk to that guy or girl, or get sweaty palms before we have to give a speech? For some, shyness and social awkwardness may not be conditional, but continuous and it can be very frustrating and hard to overcome. Fortunately, there are learnings that can help overcome shyness and make social encounters awesome. Let me share some of the tips I have learnt.
Learn to Laugh
Laughter is the best medicine and there is something about it that makes everyone feel more comfortable. I learnt this early in life and used it as an ice breaker at work and even at parties to get others comfortable and at ease. So, don't be afraid to laugh at someone's jokes, or learn a few funny lines yourself.
Force Yourself to Stay
As hard as this is to do, it does work. If ever I was invited to a party, where I didn’t know anyone, I would find every possible excuse in the book, to be there just for a bit. I realised I wasn’t alone in this feeling, because shy people do feel uncomfortable in a social situation that they just want it to end or get away. Consciously resist this impulse. Tell yourself to stand your ground, stay put, and interact. Whenever I told my mind, that I would stay and interact with any stranger, I began to slowly gain confidence and it helped me overcome the shyness. A healthy conversation is all it would take.
Learn to be Comfortable with Silence
Social situations can feel awkward if you are uncomfortable with mutual silence. This can trigger shy people to “babble” to fill the silence, which then makes them feel even more awkward because they feel like what they're saying is silly or nonsensical. So be cool – some silence between people is okay. In fact, it helps give the other person a chance to think before he or she speaks. The person you're speaking with will appreciate this!
Stretch
Just like physical stretching, socially and psychologically stretching can be somewhat uncomfortable, even painful. But also like physical stretching, it's necessary. If your first instinct is to say “No” when someone asks you to do something, stop and think first. Tell the person you will get back to him or her if you aren't sure. This will give you some time to pluck up your courage and say “Yes.”
When to Seek a Professional
There is a point when simple shyness and social awkwardness may be an actual disorder. Social anxiety disorder and social phobia are real disorders that may need the help of a professional. The difference between shyness and these disorders is how much it affects your life. If you believe you go to lengths to find any possible trick to avoid attending a social function, then it could be a social disorder and you should reach out for help. If it's social anxiety or phobia, it can have an impact on your normal productive life and you should consider seeking professional help.
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