why are people so mad at each other? How do we stop the arguments?
disclaimer: this document is based on my own experience and not the knowledge of a psychological or sociological professional/expert
I have been trying to figure out why on earth people are so incredibly mad at each other. it's possible that I will never fully understand anger because it is not an emotion that I experience very often. All I can say is that it pains me to see people yelling and screaming abusively at each other.
in my years of dealing with arguments on video game servers. I discovered a common trend in how arguments tend to escalate. One of the main things I see is when a person gets mad at someone for something they perceive as wrong and tries to insult them. this is how a lot of arguments get started. The argument then escalates when the insulted person gets offended and angry and tries to insult the insulter. The argument can get bigger and bigger until physical threats of violence and other rather rash things are said.
How do we counteract this? in my experience, when someone tries to insult you and you get mad, it is a good idea to not respond until later when you are not mad. Is it really worth your time to get back at someone who clearly doesn't have the wisdom to realize that it is not a good idea to be rude and insult someone. In my opinion it is better to wait until you have calmed down and are willing to talk it over if necessary.
Another thing you can do is apologize. If you don't know what you did then ask. apologies can go a long way toward making peace. You don't have to be overly apologetic, but make sure that the person who was offended by your actions knows that you didn't mean to offend them.
One of the best ways to prevent an argument is to assume that someone means well by their actions. If you assume that someone means well by their actions and don't get offended, then, in my experience, you are less likely to get mad and say something that could start a major argument.
I have a hard time understanding anger because I don't really get angry at people, But I have seen many arguments on game servers. I hope that this short write up will help some people in some way shape or form with preventing an argument from getting to the point of physical violence. Possibly even preventing the argument in the first place.