I Dream Of Gene(alogical Dementia)

I swear, my sister, my other sister, my mother, and my late-Father, they all feared (fear) a possibility of Dementia. My father kinda/sorta had an early onset of it, but it was more akin to (poor) health-induced senility.

I, I am probably prone to getting it (Dementia) all out. I took gobs of LSD as a teenager, became (basically) an invalid when I was 20-21 years old, narrowly crawled my way out of that delusional hellscape, and have (in the past decade) bounced to and fro from one undermining life situation to another – while witnessing one form of desolate life(style) or another meet my blinders again and again.

I'd have no real issue with a disposition of “not knowing”. Of unawareness. 99% of my days have been spent in near total isolation where I am at now, for 6+ years. The past year the most severe of that time. I used to peep my head above water, only to interact with people (family) that melted my conscious and desire to be alive with noxious toxicity, which led to nothing more than considerate alcohol consumption on my part. And low and behold, I negate their presence from my life, and I'm stone cold sober a week later (or perhaps I became sober before telling them to fxxx off?). Either way, hail sobriety, and I will always be this way.

Hope life spins it's wheels to accommodate how I see/am in the world, and that the Farmington situation (assessment facility and then a clustered (community-style) apartment property) sees through. Or some form of “independent” group home is arranged by me and the housing manager(s) in the near future.

Hope things pan out. Fingers crossed until my knuckles break.

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