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“You have everything you need?”
Gue menoleh ke arah Adam setelah masuk ke kursi penumpang di sebelah dia. Dengan lirikan terakhir ke belakang, di mana tas overnight gue berada, terletak di samping pet cargo di mana Eve tertidur pulas. “Iya, udah.”
“Ya udah, kita berangkat sekarang.” Sebelum Adam mengangkat rem parkir untuk mulai jalan, gue meletakkan tangan di atas lengannya, menghentikannya dari tindakan tersebut. “Apaan?”
Tanpa berkata apa-apa, gue mengulurkan tangan gue ke tengah, menatap kedua netra Adam dengan tatapan serius dan menunggunya untuk melakukan hal yang sama. Hanya butuh beberapa detik agar dia mengerti maksud gue, dan kedua alisnya langsung menyatu, wajah Adam berubah menjadi fokus.
“Rock... paper... scissors!” Simultaneously, we played our cards, the results eliciting a yell of anger from Adam and a yell of triumph for me. Gue dengan senang hati dan puas karena menang lawan Adam, gue melambaikan tangan gue yang membentuk kertas di depan mukanya, mengejeknya karena dia—sesuai dengan dugaan gue—keluarkan batu.
“Gue udah bilang, lo itu predictable banget, Dam,” ejek gue, menyender ke kursi dan menghela lega. “Jadi besok gue nyetir balik, dan lo bayaran makanan.”
“Hari ini juga?”
“Emang lo belum makan?” Gue melirik ke jam tangan—baru jam sembilan, dan gue udah sarapan dikit.
“I had a slice of toast.”
“Just a slice?” Ia mengangguk.
Alis gue naik. “You can't fry up an egg?”
He sighed, looking ahead, “The last time I did that, I burnt it.”
“Did you leave it?”
“Cuma sebentar!” Ia berusaha buat membela diri. “I had an important email to reply to.”
“Kalo tahu harus ngelakuin hal yang penting, jangan masak sampe kelar,” gue tegur, membuatnya terdiam. “Cari makan aja biar lo ngga ngambekan di jalan.”
“Please, Ri, I'm not a kid, I don't get hangry,” ujarnya sambil memutar bola matanya.
“So, you've accepted that you, once again, lost a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors against me?” Gue langsung tertawa bahak-bahak ketika ia melirik gue dengan tatapan sinis, membuktikan kalo dia belum terima kekalahannya. Mendengar tawa gue, sudut bibir Adam terangkat.
Kita berdua kembali dengan keadaan hening, hanya lagu-lagu yang main dari radionya mengisi suasana di antara kita berdua.
It only settled then that I was stuck with him for the next hour or so, dan bukannya gue ngga mau ngobrol bareng dia, suasana di antara Adam dan gue udah mencair saat kita main RPS, tapi... bingung mau ngomong apa.
What do you say to someone you hadn't seen in 10 years?
The things I was curious about were already answered, and from his explanation, ngga banyak yang terjadi di hidupnya selain terus belajar agar pantas untuk menerima posisi dia sebagai Chief of Technology. Gue juga udah tahu riwayat pendidikannya karena berkas yang gue temukan, and to be honest, not much has changed about Adam since I saw him that night after prom.
Well, that's not entirely correct. Yang pasti, he's gotten taller, and he's grown into his features, tapi personality-wise, I would say he's the same—an ultimate cat-lover, technology geek and terrible cook.
Ada suara yang bukan dari radio tiba-tiba terdengar, membuat gue menoleh ke belakang dan Adam melirik melalui kaca spion. Eve barusan bangun, dan ketika gue menoleh ke dia, dia mulai menggaruk-garuk cargonya, kepengen keluar.
“Just unlatch it, and she'll know what to do.” Gue hanya mengangguk, reaching out to unlatching her door, and watched her push the metal door open, stepping out and stretching.
Ini bukan pertama kali gue bertemu dengan Eve, karena sempat melihatnya waktu pesta perayaan ulang tahunnya Adam beberapa minggu yang lalu. Hanya karena Adam bilang kalo Eve ngga suka keramaian, maka kucing tersebut tetep di dalam kamarnya Adam. Baru kali ini gue ada kemungkinan akan berinteraksi dengan anak bulunya Adam.
Seketika, Eve bertatapan dengan gue, kepalanya miring ke samping sebelum ia melompat ke arm rest dan mengulurkan lehernya untuk mencium gue.
“I think she's confused to who you are,” Adam menjelaskan, dan gue hanya terkekeh ragu.
Bingung harus ngapain, gue mencoba untuk mengelus kepalanya, tapi Eve malah menghindari tangan gue dan melompat ke pangkuannya Adam. She situated herself on his lap, her tail going crazy as she stared at me through slitted eyes.
“Eve, ngga boleh gitu,” tegur Adam, mengelus pelan kepala peliharanya, membuat kucing tersebut menutup mata dengan tenang. “She's not usually this... rude.”
“Mungkin karena gue orang baru?” I tried to make an excuse, however, my ego was hurt. I'm usually really good with animals—cat's included karena Tante Milan punya banyak kucing and all of them don't mind my presence.
“Mungkin sih...”
Throughout the drive, gue terus melirik ke arah Eve, melihatnya tertidur pulas di atas pangkuannya Adam, ada keinginan untuk mengelusnya but I know when a cat shows it doesn't like to be touched, it won't like it the more you try to pet them. And I don't want to ignite some violent side behind her.
“Pesan ngga?” Adam bertanya, dan gue sadar kalo kita udah berhenti.
Gue melihat ke luar, dan tertawa pelan, “McDonald's?”
“Siapa tau lo lagi pengen nyoba cabang Amsterdam-nya?” Gue hanya memutar bola mata.
“Mau?” Gue mengangguk, terus Adam bertanya, “Biasa?”
Gue mencemooh. “Emang lo inget?”
“Inget lah,” ujarnya, dan gue mengangkat kedua alis, menunggu dia untuk kasih tau order biasa gue. Adam memutar bola matanya, merasa tertantang. “Your go-to order for regular hours adalah paket medium double-cheeseburger, minumannya selalu diganti jadi Sprite kalo mau gratis, atau Iced Coffee. Kalo go-to order lo untuk breakfast menu-nya adalah paket sausage McMuffin a-la-cart dan Iced Coffee, tapi lo selalu ngasih hashbrown-nya ke gue karena lo ngga suka.”
Gue terdiam menatapnya.
“Masih sama, ngga?” Gue memaksa tersenyum tipis dan mengangguk.
As he was ordering, I couldn't help but purse my lips, holding back a smile as I listened to him lay out my usual order to the employee.
So, he does still remember.
“She lives here?” Adam hanya berdeham, terkekeh pelan ketika melihat gue melihat ke sekitaran dengan mulut ternganga. Setelah satu jam lebih, kita akhirnya sampai ke halaman rumahnya Tante Edna, and let me tell you how beautiful the place is.
The entire front of the house is covered with vines, flourishing underneath the bright blue sky of Rotterdam. The lush green of the foliage wrapped around the house is contrast to the ivory walls. Halamannya melingkari satu rumah, dan ada danau kecil juga. Rumah ini emang terletak di meadows, maka banyak greenery yang ditemukan di sekitaran rumah tersebut. It's a private area, too, ngga jauh dari kota, tapi cukup terpencil agar ngga terganggu pada kegiatan sehari-hari.
It's a retiree's dream house.
Gue bisa membayangkan diri sendiri tinggal di rumah seperti ini. Jauh dari kota, dekat dengan alam. I could have my own garden, where I'd grow my own ingredients as I live out my retirement.
Benar-benar nyaman banget, dan pas dengan Tante Edna.
Seinget gue, Tante Edna suka tiba-tiba ke rumah gue waktu kecil, membawa bahan-bahan yang beliau menumbuhkan di kebun rumahnya, dan bersama Mama, mereka memasak-masak untuk makan malam. Papa dan Adam pasti ke belakang rumah untuk menyalakan api agar bisa berbakar-bakar, dan gue membantu kedua orang tua gue, running back and forth.
“Bunda, Bun!” Adam memanggil ibunya, dan gue berdiri di belakang, tas gue terletak di bahu. Ada rasa khawatir yang muncul selagi gue menunggu beliau untuk turun, mata gue melirik sekitaran rumahnya, while rubbing my hands nervously.
Terakhir kali gue ketemu dengan Tante Edna adalah waktu pemakaman orang tua gue di tahun 2017—so it's been a good five years since I saw her. I never tried to stay in contact, since we didn't exchange numbers then, but she looked well.
“Adam? Udah sampe?” Gue langsung berdiri tegak ketika mendengar suara wanita payuh baya dari atas tangga.
“Iya, Bun,” Adam menjawab, terus menoleh ke gue, memberi gue senyuman hangat, as if to reassure me I had nothing to be nervous about. “Ada Auristella juga.”
“Stella?” Mendengar nama gue keluar dari bibirnya membuat gue seketika merinding, it has been a while.
Terdengar langkah-langkah yang mendarat dengan cepat, tiba-tiba secepat kilat, gue udah dirangkul oleh Tante Edna, capturing me in a tight hug. Gue menatap Adam dengan mata belalak, kaget akan ibunya yang melewati anak lelakinya untuk memeluk gue duluan.
Adam hanya terkekeh, kepalanya bergeleng-geleng. “Bun, you're choking her.”
“Eh, aduh- maaf.”
“Ngga apa-apa, kok,” ujar gue, dan menarik diri dari pelukannya agar bertatapan dengannya. She doesn't look any different than when I last saw her, maybe more grey strands in her auburn hair, tapi selain itu, she looks the same.
“Kamu makin cantik aja, Stella, astaga,” pujinya, kedua matanya memerah dan berkaca-kaca as she reached out to brush my hair back from my face. “You look so much like your mother.”
Seketika jantung gue berdebar, dada gue terasa sesak sesaat dan gue ngga bisa berkata apa-apa. The person closest to my parents, that weren't direct family, emang Tante Edna. Tante Edna dan orang tua gue bertemu karena gue dan Adam menunggu jemputan bareng habis sekolah, dan gue belum rela untuk membiarkan Adam menunggu sendiri, maka kita berempat menunggu kehadiran Tante Edna yang terjebak di kemacetan.
Since then, just like Adam and I, they stayed friends. It was convenient for the both of us, as them being close meant that he and I could meet each other with no problem at all throughout our friendship.
“Udah makan belum?” Tante Edna bertanya, melirik ke gue dan Adam.
Sebelum gue bisa menjawab, Adam mengujar, “Sarapan udah, sih, Bun.”
“Oh, makan siang belum, ya, berarti?” Ia bertanya ke kita berdua tapi melihat ke gue.
“Iya, belum, Tan.”
“Ya udah, istirahat dulu ya, walaupun cuma sejam tapi pasti capek di jalan, kan?” Beliau terus menepuk pelan lengan anak laki-lakinya. “Show Stella around, ya, nak? Eh—” Tante Edna kembali melihat ke gue. “—Kamu nginep, kan? Harus nginep lah, di sini beda dengan Amsterdam... You have to see this place in the morning when it's foggy.”
“Aku nginep, kok, Tante,” jawab gue, sembari menepuk tas overnight gue.
“Bagus,” ia tersenyum kepada gue, dan menyuruh Adam, “Anterin ke kamarnya, ya, nak. Yang kosong di lantai tiga... Kalian berdua istirahat dulu, kalo cari saya, ada di halaman belakang, ya?” Gue mengangguk mengerti dan tersenyum kepadanya, sebelum Tante Edna pergi ke dapur, dan gue ikut Adam menuju ke lantai tiga.
“I hope you're okay with the stairs,” ujar Adam ketika kita mulai naik ke lantai tiganya.
“It's fine, the scenery makes up for the work out.” Ketika kita sampe ke kamar yang kosong, gue letakkan tas gue di lantai, dekat ujung tempat tidur sebelum mengikat rambut panjang gue.
“Lo mau istirahat dulu atau gimana?”
“Mau ke taman ngobrol bareng Tante Edna,” jawab gue, “lo?”
“Mau tidur bentar, kamar gue seberang,” Adam kasih tau, sambil menunjuk ke arah pintu tertutup di seberang lorong. “Bangunin kalo mau makan siang aja.”
“Lo ngga bantu-bantu nyiapin makanan?”
He then gave me a look, one that said really?. “My mom doesn't trust me around food.”
Gue hanya tertawa, dan ngusirnya. I ascended down the two flights of stairs, following the same pathway as Tante Edna, dan menemukan beliau sedang duduk santai in the midst of her yard on a garden chair. “Aku boleh ikut?”
Beliau sempat kaget, dan mengangguk, “Boleh, boleh, sayang.”
Minutes passed without any of us saying anything, hanya terduduk diam sambil mendengar burung-burung yang bernyanyi di pohon and the gentle breeze that passed.
“Kamu apa kabar, Stella?” Gue menoleh ke Tante Edna, tapi beliau tetep menatap ke depan. “How have you been since...” Ia ngga mau ngelanjut pernyataan tersebut dan gue ngga mempersalahkan. Despite reaching the acceptance stage, talking about has always been a different story.
“I've been doing fine... Ada keluarga adeknya Mama, dan juga teman-teman Stella,” gue menjelaskan, listing people that were present while I was going through the grief.
“Has Adam...” She seemed to struggle to find the right words. “How are you with Adam?”
“We're...” Okay? Masih jauh, rasanya kayak gue baru aja maafin dia. “We're working things out, Tan.”
Ia terkekeh pelan, “Kamu masih aja panggil aku tante walaupun udah sering aku minta kamu panggil Bunda aja.”
“Itu khusus buat Adam aja, Tan,” ujar gue sembari tertawa kecil. Seketika, sama waktu gue berdua dengan Adam di mobil, gue juga bingung mau ngomong apa dengan Tante Edna.
“He missed you a lot, Stella, Tante bisa mastiin itu,” ia mulai, tanpa melihat ke arah gue tapi gue melihatnya. “I told you waktu itu kalo dia bener-bener minta maaf karena ngga bisa dateng, tapi Tante belum bisa jelasin kenapa... Semoga dia udah kasih tau ke kamu sekarang...”
“Udah, kok, Tan.”
“The day he wanted to meet you again after all this time... He made that day his goal so he could strive through everything he was going through... You meant the world to him, dan waktu ia memilih untuk ngga kasih tau apa-apa ke kamu, it crushed him.”
Akhirnya, beliau menoleh untuk menatap gue, kedua matanya berkaca-kaca ketika ia mengujar, “You mean everything to Adam, Stella. I hope you know that.”
I smiled softly, reaching out to hold her hand in mine, gently stroking my thumb against warm hand. Gue mengangguk sekali. “I know, Tan, I know that now.”
“Gue aja yang cuci piring, ngapa?” Adam mulai protes ketika gue nyalain keran dan bergegas mulai cuci piring yang telah dipake untuk makan malam hari ini.
Seharian, gue dibawa keliling kebunnya Tante Edna, di mana beliau kasih lihat sayur-sayurannya yang ia menumbuh di kebun, dan juga beberapa kandang yang terisi dengan banyak ayam and bebek. She was truly living the idealistic lifestyle in the countryside with homegrown produce and livestock.
Setelah makan siang, beliau harus ke kota untuk bertemu dengan beberapa teman, membiarkan gue dan Adam di rumah. He was adamant untuk nganterin, which she finally let him after asking dan akhirnya, setelah nganterin ibunya, gue dan Adam jalan-jalan di sekitaran Rotterdam. We couldn't do much in Rotterdam, karena gue emang lagi ngga pengen jadi turis and it's not like I won't be visiting Tante Edna after this, jadi we kept a mental note on things we could do when we came back.
We returned back at her home close to dinner time, dan gue bantu menyiapkan hidangannya, sesuai dengan arahan Tante Edna, dan Adam cuma bantu untuk mengambil bahannya dari kebun. I was lucky to witness him being scolded when he tried to reach to stir the fried vegetables.
“You'll think to season it and end up overseasoning it,” tegur Tante Edna, membuat Adam cemberut dan berdiri di sudut dapur, tanpa melakukan apa-apa.
“Gue yang nawar diri buat cuci piring juga,” ucap gue, ngga menghiraukan protesnya Adam.
“Why don't you do the drying and putting it back, then?”
“Because I don't know wear things go, that's the logical thing to do, Adam,” jelas gue, “I wash today and learn where to put things another time. You've lived here, you know where things go, I don't.” Terlihat dari pantulan jendela di depan gue kalo Adam ingin ngebantah, tapi mungkin ia ngerti maksud gue dan tetep diam.
“So, what did you and my mom talk about?” tanyanya sambil mengelap mangkok yang gue serahkan.
“Women things.” I watched as he rolled his eyes with a sigh, opening a cupboard and placing the bowl. “It's between her and I, you don't need to know, Adam.”
He only grumbled.
Gue tertawa pelan, kembali fokus kepada panci yang tadi kepake untuk tumisan sayur, a few bits too stubborn to be cleaned when a light flashed in front of me against the dark sky. Refleks, gue hanya menutup mata, ngga bisa nutup kedua telinga gue ketika petir tersebut muncul, dan jantung gue berdebar, just wishing it'll pass quick so I can get this over with.
However, warmth suddenly encompassed both my ears and I could feel the shake of the house from the lightning but it was muffled. Slowly I opened my eyes to look at the reflection on the window, dan ditemukan Adam berdiri di belakang gue, kedua tangannya menutup telinga gue as his eyes watched outside on alert.
Gue menoleh melihatnya. “Are you okay?” Ia bertanya, suaranya meredam.
Remember when I said nothing much about him has changed? I take that back. Everything has changed.
He wasn't my shy best friend of fifteen years anymore. He isn't the same boy that would spam my phone with messages to get on our Minecraft server so he could beat the Enderdragon. He wasn't the same boy that would get upset because I didn't want to watch his favorite anime series. He's not the best friend I grew up with.
He's changed. He's grown. He's mature, and I...
Do I still see him as a friend?