27
27 I used to think that day was just a far off dream for me Dreading when I wake because I can't see past next week “What's the point of living if I'm just living a lie?” Those echoes in my memory are far away tonight
27 I used to think that I was all alone feeling this pain Using words and writing poems to keep up the pace Whisper reassurances to myself to feel safe Hugging pillows tightly as I'm drifting in this space
27 Now the railing that I'm safely behind keeps me sane I'm not quite the black rose that I pricked, but just the same I still can't see past next week, but maybe that's okay Maybe in this case my age was not an early grave
27 Now I use a new name and I wear a different face But I'm still the same girl even if I'm less afraid Back then I sat on sidelines to watch everyone else live And now, for once, it's my turn, I've got something new to give
27 I don't need to tell myself that I'm not worth living I don't need to hold onto my reassurances I don't need to feel like if I left no one would care I've made it this far and now I'm letting myself live
27 I'm doing my best and I know that's all I can do I know it's enough and I know you will see it, too This life is so precious and that's why, now, I can say I'm glad that I know that I'll be turning 28
There's no big ending, no big rhyme to close off this chapter I'm not ending anything with a bang or a whimper Just acknowledging what I've now firmly put behind me
This is how it ends This is how it starts I deserve it.