“False expectations”

Today is October 28th 2021 and it's 4:01 a.m. This has been a very upsetting and tragic time. The thing I fretted of losing this supposed “dream” job and beautiful home has become a reality. I feel torn from my wife. I have been terminated because of my mental illness. Only a month after returning from a broken ankle I suffered at work. I have been having problems with my wife because a co worker has been coming over my home and contently informing her of my conflicts with management. As well as complaints on certain aspects of work due to my voicing my opinion having to familiarize myself with the cows being milked since I've just recuperated and freshly back from a broken ankle I suffered at work. She would then argue with me telling me to stop standing up for myself and just stay quite. To which I responded negatively. Well we are now considering separating after 18 years. The lack of therapy for both of us and the depression for her being alone while I'm at work since it's 6 days a week split shift meaning I could dedicate 36 hours a week aside from my day off which I pretty much slept through. That has directly caused us to slowly unravelled the foundation that couples therapy had built over past year. It's been very difficult to find a therapist here in Marin county. The fact that we are separating caused me to suffer from severe depression to which I had a depressive psychotic episode in which I missed my last shift at the end of my work week. I went to the clinic the following day. So unfortunately I missed 1 shift. Well the next day which happen to be my day off after returning from the clinic the the owner pulled up after me and she handed me an envelope to which contained a check for $56.00 since my wages were garnished for owned taxes to the government. $600+ to be exact. My whole last check. I did not fully comprehend what was going on. Then about an hour later I received a text from the owners husband telling me “ you no longer work here, please make arrangements for the housing provided will be needed for replacement employee. I couldn't believe it. According to the fair housing and disabilities act there are supposed to be accommodations made for I am legally declared severely disabled by the state of California. I guess I don't get such luxuries due to my lack in legal residency. The thing is my mother never register me at birth there for I don't exist in the governments eyes. Not even a Mexican citizen. To make things worse they have made it clear I'm not wanted nor welcome since they followed me up the hill with their high beams on me and followed me all the way to my home and remained parked in front. I had to close the blinds so my wife would not notice. Didn't move for 10 minutes. Now they want my wife and I to go back to living in our vehicle since we have until the end of October to be out of this home. Mind you I was terminated on the 8th of this month. Why is there always unwarranted misplaced animosity towards me where ever I go. My deeds which are pure intentions are always repaid in a negative manor. So I have interviews and possible employment here in point reyes station CA. Yet it almost seems as if my ex employers are trying to make it so that we have no choice but to leave town. There have been employees who have been terminated yet allowed to remain in the homes so long as rent is paid. Why can't I do the same? I have funding to cover 2 months of rent. Yet they won't accept it. I am truly being treated unfairly and my poor wife has to endure it by my side. SMH. I will not stand for it. I will stand my ground and I will not falter. I guess misery found a way to take away from me what I feared the most. My wife. My 3 curses in life. #1Family, #2Truth, and #3Equality. I've never known how those 3 feel for I have no kin nor heritage nor even know the name of my biological father. So now I bow my head and pray and ask God in the name of Jesus Christ to give us the strength to triumph over this nightmare set forth in front of us in order to remain vigilant on the road to righteousness in the strive for progress for all those who have no ill will towards anyone, for we are the ones who suffer the most in the world yet, we are the ones who can and will become the strongest through a righteous cause if God sees fit in the everyday battle in ones mind, and ones life, in the war of living a fully successful life. For if you are weak at heart this world will surely corrupt you. And to those that do have ill will towards others, please Lord help them change they're ways in order for they're salvation to become possible through redemption through the sacrifice your son Jesus Christ gave his life for, as I learn to forgive those who sin against my wife and I, just as we are forgiven for our sins by our Holy Father. In your name we pray for ever and ever, Amen. We will rise for I don't have it in me to quit. Mind over Body, Soul over Mind, Heart over All.