Why Argue?

Everyone has something to believe in. Each person has a unique perspective about different aspects of life. You have your beliefs too. Unfortunately, not everyone will think that it’s true or valid. And surely, you might not agree about what other people think as well. That’s okay! Due to individual differences, people are entitled to their own opinions.

However, there are instances when you need to assert your opinions, especially if others’ beliefs are causing chaos and bringing negativity to a group. Conversely, there are those you can ignore. With that said, you need to understand when you should argue and when you should not bother. But first, you need to know why there are individual opinions in the first place.

According to psychology, there are different aspects that affect the belief system of individuals. Here are a few:

Cultural Influences

The most common factor that affects one’s belief system is the culture and environment of a person. This includes the upbringing strategies of parents, personal beliefs of their ancestors, and exposure to cultural traditions. For example, some cultures promote prayer and meditation as healing. They steer clear from the use of medicine and modern technology as treatment. This belief is brought by centuries of tradition. It is a belief system laid down from one generation to another. Some individuals who grew up in the medical field frowns upon the aforementioned belief. However, it is not something to be argued about because of respect of tradition and culture.

Education

Another factor that affects one’s belief is education. People go to different schools with different core values. These have a tremendous impact to the upbringing of a child. For example, if a child studied in a religious school, he or she might feel strongly towards religious practices. If one went to military school, he or she could be more inclined to promoting discipline. Aside from the school itself, one could learn from the beliefs of his or her teachers or classmates. Due to regular interaction, people can pick up a thing or two and carry it until adulthood.

Personal Experiences

The last but not the least factor that affects one’s belief the system is his or her experiences. This is a more malleable concept because these learnings can be changed, unlearned, and assimilated as time passes by. For example, if a woman was hurt by a man, she might think that all men are hurtful. But as time passes by, she realizes that there are men out there who are loving and caring. Another example is when a person grows to hate his parents for their constant discipline. As he grows old and starts a family of his own, he realizes the importance of the discipline that his parents did for him.

Do you see it? The belief system of people grows with experience. It consists of various elements that are interconnected to form how people think. While some ideas and beliefs can be changed, others are ingrained in a person and is unlikely to fade. Knowing what affects one’s way of thinking, how will you know now if a subject is worth arguing about? Here are tips to find out.

**1. Argue if it can better your relationship.
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According to experts, arguing healthily and politely can solidify relationships. There could be conflict in the beginning but it ends in a compromise which is beneficial to both parties. In familial relationships, for example, the most common subjects of arguments include monetary allocations, disciplining children, and other major decisions. It’s always better to share your thoughts about a specific topic to effectively weigh in the pros and cons and reach a common ground.

**2. Argue if you think it’s for someone else’s benefit.
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Parents argue with their children for a good reason. Not every concept that a child picks up from the outside environment is beneficial for his or her well-being*. This is why parents need to assert their opinions about these subjects so a child can think twice about his or her behavior. When you argue with your children in a peaceful way, you can make them see the pros and cons of their actions. You can teach them which activities will make them better and you can warn them which behaviors will get them into trouble. It could be difficult to argue with your kids sometimes, but maybe you just need to find the right approach to make them listen.
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**3. Don’t argue when people are sarcastic and stubborn.
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*Arguing takes time and effort. It also takes a toll on your emotional bank. This is why you need to choose which people you should argue with. If you think that person is not conducive to other’s opinions, don’t bother arguing with them. They will either approach you with sarcasm or idiocracy which will only ruin your day. So, stop wasting your time with people like this. For what it’s worth, that behavior is a problem they need to endure for a long time.
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**4. Don’t argue if you think you can let it go.
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The last but not the least tip is to let it go. Life’s too short to magnify minor issues. So, if you think you an let things slide, do so. It’s good for peace and tranquility. If you want, you can leave one-liners why you didn’t like the behavior and move on. Let the other person think about what you said, hoping that he or she will make the difference.

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