I believe over the course of the last years I have rather successfully deconstructed beauty. As a designer, I wanted to learn how to create objects that are beautiful.
As a man, I wanted to unravel that intense feeling of looking into a beautiful woman's face.
As a child, I vaguely remember that people often complimented me for my beautiful face.
Now, that thrilling feeling when seeing a beautiful face has vanished. I learned how the patterns in the structure of a face can be beautiful to me. And the woman who once struck me with her intensely perfect face is just like one familiar face among many others.
My own face seems utterly normal, only a bit older than a few years ago.
I learned that beauty does not merely lie in the surface. Shaping a perfectly beautiful face I recognized that beauty is also in the movements, in the expressions, and in the character of the person wearing it. That was something entirely impossible to model in a clay surface.
In a way, my perception has shifted its focus from the mere surfaces to the meaning underlying it and I find beauty in what people say.
So maybe, in the same way that I try to bring up and find beauty in other people, my goal should be to try to make my face look as beautiful as possible to me.
Not by changing anything to its surface, but by changing who I am and what I do how.