On Diction, and #language (Why do I always write this stuff at forsaken hours)
Every now and then I find myself thinking about diction. That is, the words we choose to use to express ourselves. Depending on what brought the thought to my mind, the train starts off in different directions, but I want to try and organize it a bit in writing.
A linguistical skeptic is likely to argue that words have no inherent meaning and therefore, is it really important what words we choose to use? The answer to this becomes clear as soon as you consider the nature of derogatory and pejorative language, but let's grace this with consideration for a moment. First we must take as a given that language does already exist, and there's nothing we can do about that. Language was an important development in human history- arguably the most important. According to some scholars, it is what sets H. sapiens apart from other extinct hominids and other animals in general. It's the reason we are what we are, without getting into too much detail. A blessing and a curse. But I digress. Yes, it's true that words only hold meaning because we decide that they do. But that sentence is deceptive. What I really mean is that language is a Social Construct, just like politics, money, and marriage. In a vacuum of course none of these things are meaningful or valuable. But we (humanity, or society, or whatever) have collectively agreed that these words mean what they do, in order that we can communicate as clearly as possible* what we are thinking. In fact it is entirely possible that we wouldn't even be thinking such complex thoughts in the first place if we didn't have language to the degree that we do. And so, sadly, we must not dwell on the question of meaning, because, well, it's fucking pointless.
*not very clearly at all, it would seem
Okay, so before I forget why I started writing this at all, I'll get to the point. So what made me think about diction this time in particular? Well, I was considering the impact of the words I and others choose, with regards to my own feelings. My mother likes to say that it's more important to understand the content of what someone is saying than the package they put it in. That is to say, don't get upset that it sounds patronizing or rude or aggressive, only get upset if they mean to hurt you by it. I fundamentally disagree with this position. I don't really feel like explaining why. Maybe some other time, but it feels more like a rant on how my father speaks to me...
Anyway. It's just really interesting to me that I avoid using terms that would be suitable or appropriate or simply convenient, for the sole reason that I want to be sure no one misunderstands me. The fact that I need a certain label for my relationships, so that I can be comfortable in them, despite them being exactly the same as a different kind of relationship. Why does “it doesn't matter if it's romantic or not” give me anxiety while calling my non-romantic partner “boyfriend” is completely fine? Why can't my heart be in it when I joke about being gay, when it's true that I am also attracted to same-gender people? Why do I sometimes feel like a “girl” or a “boy” but never a “woman” or a “man,” while the definition of these words do apply to me, an adult? Why am I comfortable being enby, but not comfortable being trans? And these are just the questions I have about myself!
The truth is, I don't have a clear answer. And that can be frustrating. Especially when I have to try and explain myself to people. It's hard to justify a preference in diction when other parties can't see the difference. There isn't much else I can say about it. Hopefully this has given any readers some mildly engaging food for thought. Goodnight!