Every Zodiac Sign if They Were Alien Cultures from Star Trek

I’m not a person who gives all that much credence to the idea of star signs. I can see some logic in the idea that when you’re born shapes aspects of your personality but not enough to ever choose partners or make other decisions based on this info.

That said, I’m very much a Virgo. I also identify strongly with the Vulcans on Star Trek, and for many of the same reasons. Which got me thinking: with the plethora of different species that have graced the screen across the Star Trek universe, there has to be one that aligns with all the other signs, too.

 And even though I’m aware this is among the geekiest stoned shower thought sounding kind of concept, I couldn’t help myself once I got the thought in my head. So here’s the answer to the question no one was asking: my pairings for which Star Trek race aligns to each star sign.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Ferengi

Since we just entered Libra time, let’s start there. And no, I didn’t pair these up just because the sign for Libra is scales, though that’s definitely the zodiac symbol that would appeal most to the Ferengi. The Ferengi are basically Capitalism: The Civilization. There are a few Ferengi peppered through Next Generation and DS9, but the most prominent is Quark, owner of the bar on Deep Space 9, whose good-natured greed sets the stage for many a fun romp.

While the Libra archetype is geared a bit more toward justice and equality than the winner-take-all mentality of the Ferengi, there is a lot of overlap between the typical Libra personality and the Ferengi, like:

…and, to be fair, Quark certainly isn’t the only Ferengi. His brother Nom is the Libra-iest of them all, with his penchant to fight for workers’ rights (though that’s a very un-Ferengi-like thing to do).

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Cardassians

The Cardassians have always been one of my favorite Star Trek species. I know they’re supposed to be the bad guys, most of the time, but they’re just so witty and charming about it that I can’t help liking them anyway. Like Garak, the tailor who is definitely just a tailor and not at all a spy, or Gul Dukat, whose ruthless ambition makes him the perfect foil to Benjamin Sisko throughout DS9.

It’s the complexity of Cardassian characters I think I appreciate most, and that’s true of Scorpios, too. A lot of this sign’s typical traits can also describe Cardassians, like:

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Talaxians

Viewers of Voyager know at least one Talaxian: the cook, Neelix, who is unflappably good-natured even after living through a sequence of traumas: the violent conquest of his homeworld, the deaths of his entire family, watching the love of his life turn into a beam of energy. Like Nelix, many Talaxians are refugees from their occupied homeworld, traveling the Delta Quadrant as traders.

Adventurous and curious Sagittarius are the zodiac sign most associated with travel and wanderlust, so they feel like a natural fit, especially since they share other traits like:

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Romulans

The Romulans are kind of like the dark elves of the Star Trek universe, a foil offshoot of the Vulcans. They share the Vulcan rejection of emotion and sentimentality but add a dose of ruthless ambition, and serve as a delightfully unpredictable antagonist for the Federation whenever they grace the screen. 

Now, I’m not saying that Capricorns are natural villains, but they do share a lot of common traits with the Romulans, like:

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Trills

While the Trill don’t look that different from people on the outside, they’re internally one of the more unique Star Trek species because each one individual is actually two life forms: a humanoid host, and a slug-like symbiont that lives somewhere in their torso. The host can access all of the symbiont’s memories and experiences but adds their personality to the mix, creating an increasingly complex individual as the trill’s lifetime goes on.

Like Trill, Aquarius is among the most unique zodiac signs, known for being eccentric deep thinkers. And they have other things in common:

…now, to be fair, I’m basing this mostly on the Dax character from DS9, though we do see multiple hosts of that symbiont across the series. These traits seem to hold true for Discovery’s Tal from what we’ve seen of them too, though, so I’ll stick to the pairing.

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Kelpien

And I’m not just saying this because the Kelpiens look kind of fishy. If you haven’t watched Discovery you’re probably not familiar with Kelpiens, and that’s a shame because they’re one of the most fun-looking recurring Star Trek species. They also have a unique backstory, bred as a prey species by the predatory Ba’ul who share their planet. As a prey species, they are highly empathetic and attuned to their environment, with an especially hair-trigger threat response that takes the fun form of ganglia.

Pisces is one of the friendliest and most empathetic signs, and that’s what made me think the Kelpiens would be a good match. There are other commonalities, too:

Aries (March 21-April 19): Klingons

The Klingons are arguably the best-known of the Star Trek aliens and I’m assuming they need no introduction, but just in case: they’re the ones with the face ridges, like Worf, Gowron, General Martok, or half of B’elanna Torres. The relationship between humans and Klingons changes over the course of the shows. They’re at war with the Federation in the Kirk and Pike era, but this makes them fierce, powerful allies by the end of DS9, when their courage and battle prowess helps the Federation win the Dominion War.

Aries is a fire sign ruled by the planet Mars, and are known for very Klingon-like traits like:

Taurus (April 20-May 20): Bajorans

Viewers were first introduced to Bajorans through Ensign Ro Laren on Next Generation, then got the full story on Bajor over the course of DS9, with Major Kira Nerys serving as the main-cast representative of the species. Bajor spent the prior 50 years resisting Cardassian occupation, and their stubborn streak doesn’t fade when they gain their independence. They’re also among the most spiritual of the Star Trek civilizations, and their worship of the Prophets is a driving influence of both their culture and the plot of the series.

No sign is synonymous with stubbornness quite like Taurus, and that’s the main reason I paired these two together. But they also share traits like:

Gemini (May 21-June 20): The Founders/Changelings

Odo is one of my favorite characters across the Star Trek universe. For those unfamiliar, he’s the shape-shifting Constable of Deep Space 9, thought to be a singular entity until the opening of the wormhole introduces the Federation to his people, referred to as the Founders by the residents of the Gamma Quadrant.

The Gemini sign represents two personalities in one, so they seem an obvious fit for the species that can be multiple things. And they have other things in common, too, like:

Cancer (June 21-July 22): Betazoids

The defining trait of Betazoids is that they’re empaths. In other words, they can sense other people’s emotions, and also have fun mental abilities like telepathy or manipulating other people’s minds.

Empathy is an equally core trait of the Cancer zodiac, who share other traits with Betazoids like:

…as far as representative Betazoids, Deanna Troi fits the Cancer archetype pretty neatly, and whatever traits she doesn’t exhibit you’ll find in her mother Lwaxana.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): The Q

I imagine all the Leos are feeling pretty satisfied right now because they’re paired with perhaps the most powerful race in the entire Star Trek universe. The immortal Q live in another dimension and have full control over time, space, and reality, which they primarily use to fuck with people. All Q are also named Q, and presumably have some other way of differentiating each other that we lowly humans are incapable of comprehending. 

But while Leos may not need the ego-stoking of being paired with the aliens that are basically trickster gods, there are a lot of similarities between them, like:

…granted, John De Lancie’s Q usually created the problems in the first place. To be fair, though, he definitely could have solved them, too, if he wanted to—but what’s the fun in that?

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Vulcans

I gave a spoiler for this one in the intro and it’s also, I think, the most obvious. Notable Vulcans include Sarek, Tuvok, T’Pol, and half of Spock, all known for their strict adherence to logic, emotionless composure, and fierce loyalty to both their comrades and their code of ethics. As a people, the Vulcans were the first to welcome Earth into the space-faring community and are a core member of the Federation, often sent as Ambassadors to mediate disputes, negotiate treaties, and other duties where it helps to keep a cool head under pressure.

Some of the commonalities between Vulcans and Virgos include:

…basically, I’m pretty sure that Gene Roddenberry based the Vulcans on a favorite Virgo in his life.

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#StarTrek #DS9 #Voyager #Discovery #NextGeneration #Astrology