Poseur to Composer

Photo by Nina Childish

Today I was in my home office when I heard some minor chords and an arpeggio from my keyboard in the other room. It sounded like some of the avant garde jazz I've been listening to lately. I rushed in to see my cat walking on the keys. My cat plays better than I do!

I'm trying to change that, so I've been practiced the So What intro with renewed diligence. I noticed how sluggish and inefficient my fingering is (on the part right after Bill Evan's opening chords). I see opportunities to “refactor” the fingering, to make that part flow smoother with less movement of the hand.

If you're unaware of what refactoring is, it's a programming term. It means to improve code by making it more readable and efficient.

Also practiced C Major scales: my max tempo for two hands descending is 82. Hope to earn that checkmark by tomorrow night.

Time bookstanding today: 30 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 5


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Image by JazzMemes

I'm still interested in how my fingers easily play the scales when my mind is quiet and not thinking at all, even after a period of eight or more hours away from the piano.

Yesterday I suggested the reason might be because I make sure to perfectly rehearse the scales before I end a practice session. Doing this “preloads” my muscle memory with the exact fingering sequence. Then the next time I go to the piano, provided my mind is quiet and doesn't interfere, I should be able to (re)play that sequence.

So where exactly in the body does the information for the perfect fingering sequence get stored? The parasympathetic system? Some posit it may be in the spinal cord and not in the brain. It seems the information is stored and retrieved somewhere other than the mind.

Speaking of theories, I was reading about George Russell and the Lydian Chromatic Concept of Tonal Organization in The Making of Kind of Blue today. This theory of Jazz harmony made modal albums like Kind of Blue and A Love Supreme possible. I skimmed a copy of it and it's far outside my understand at present, but I hope in the not-too-distant future I'll be able to read and comprehend it.

Time bookstanding today: 40 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 6


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This morning, while my mind was clear of yesterday's debris, I practice the C Major scale. I didn’t even think about it. I just let my fingers ascend the keys using muscle memory and crossed the 90 bpm threshold easily. Muscle memory seems to work best when the mind is not interfering, and when the fingers are “preloaded” with a recent and correct sequence.

I may be on to something, so let me unpack both parts of this last sentence.

To keep the mind from interfering, one either must be clear-headed (as in first thing in the morning) or mindful / fully present in the moment (an ability developed through regular meditation). An interesting study on Chan meditation and musical performance shows mindfulness cultivated by the ancient spiritual practice of Silent Illumination improves performance quality.

For the second part of my statement, I’m testing a theory here, so bear with me. For every practice session, I conclude by playing the sequence of keys perfectly, about three of four times. I’m “preloading” the cache of my muscle memory with the correct sequence. How long does this localized muscle memory last before going corrupt? I’m not sure. During sleep, the brain consolidates and organizes the previous day’s information, so that might be at least part of the reason I aced scales this morning. But does it work during the day while conscious? Can I “preload” the muscle memory of my fingers before work and be able to play that exact sequence after work, provided my mind doesn’t interfere?

In other words, does “preloading” (as I use the term) even exist? The hypothesis deserves experimentation.

The thing is, the longer I practice, the more frequently I make mistakes due to fatigue and low-grade anxiety, and the harder it is to conclude with 3-4 perfect sequences. There is a law of diminishing returns in effect, so knowing when to quit is important.

Speaking of quitting, it's late and I'm exhausted. Hope what I wrote makes a modicum of sense.

Time bookstanding today: 40 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 5


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Seems like I've taken a step back in my C Major scales. My “max tempo” for two hands ascending has dropped slightly to 65 bpm. Descending is about 40 bpm, if that. These fluctuations and finger fumbling) has been frustrating, so I'm backing off a bit and spending more time on the So What intro.

Aside: I have a big job interview on Thursday. Should I get the job, my schedule will change dramatically. My life will change dramatically. However, my piano practice and music theory study will continue no matter what.

I'd like to read a bit before bed, so I'll stop here.

Time meditated today: 35 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 5 (To improve focus during meditation, I started bookstanding again)


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I've been tuning people out lately. Turning down meals with friends. Unsociable at church. Sometimes even downright cold. I told a coworker who plays piano and is trained in music theory that I can't wait to get home and practice my scales. She said that's “kind of weird”.

Today at the church picnic, a picnic I didn't want to attend, a friend of mine started juggling bowling pins. When did he learn that? We used to have dinner and converse for hours, but not lately. He didn't talk to me. I didn't go over and talk to him.

I haven't been on a date in months.

All these things require time, energy and money I don't have. After my work, church and family obligations and life maintenance, learning piano and music theory takes up what little resources I have left.

I'm not sure how to juggle it all.

On a more positive note...

I'm on Phase 2 of the C Major scale. This phase focuses on speed. Zach Evan's book says the phase is complete when I can ascend and descend the scale with both hands at 90 bpm. This has to be done perfectly, 3-4 times in a row.

My current “max tempo” is 70 bpm with both hands, ascending only.

I'm a bit of a to-do freak. I love that dopamine hit when I check tasks off as complete. It motivates me to work hard on these scales.

Maybe incremental subtasks I can check off are the key to maintaining a social life too?

Time meditated today: 40 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 4


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I earned the checkmark:

But my morning was a trainwreck:

Time meditated today: 0 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 0


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Yesterday's post is unintentionally funny because I liken practicing scales to watching grass grow while referencing the book Lightning Fast Piano Scales. However, the two metaphors are not in contradiction with each other. The author Zach Evans doesn't promise you'll learn piano scales lightning fast, but that by following his system you'll eventually play lightning fast. The speed training begins in Phase 2 of each piano scale.

Also keep in mind that I don't shill anyone's book or product. I mention Zach's book only because I find it helpful, and it may be of help to others.

Today I practiced using both hands on the C Major scale and didn't even get to the So What intro. Like I said yesterday, playing scales is kind of exciting for me (or a reasonable facsimile thereof) and I'm motivated to earn that first checkmark. My form isn't good though. To prevent a repetitive strain injury (too late for that) I'm supposed to roll the wrists while playing, but it's only complicating matters.

I'll continue to wear my elbow braces and integrate the wrist motion once I get comfortable with the fingering.

Almost forgot...

Time meditated today: 34 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 2


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Practicing scales is like watching grass grow.

Some will interpret the above statement to mean “practicing scales is boring / tedious / uneventful / mundane” … something along those lines. And it can be. It depends on one's attitude and expectations coming into this exercise.

Allow me to elaborate.

Last week I started growing cat grass for the first time. I used to buy it and other pet-friendly plants from a local nursery, but they went out of business. My cats have no access to the outdoors so I try to bring the outdoors to them. Since I didn’t know what kit to buy and what would produce the best harvest, I ordered four different kinds. The seeds have been prepared according to instructions and stashed away in various cupboards. I’ve monitored their progress and watering them daily. I must admit, to see dormant seeds sprout young cat grass blades that stretch skyward like a morning yawn has been, well, exciting.

Yes, watching grass grow is exciting! No explosions or special effects required, just add water to witness a miracle unfold.

Practicing scales has brought about a similar excitement. Yesterday I prepared for practice according to instructions found in the ebook Lightning Fast Piano Scales by Zach Evans. Today was my day off work, so I began the first of many scales: C Major. My fingers fumbled and clunked the keys, but after repeated attempts (interspersed with a nap and some casual reading) I can now perform the scale smoothly with my right hand, both forward and backwards.

Then I practiced my left hand. The fingers fumbled and stumbled with the scale, but after several practice sessions the scale can be played smoothly, both ascending and descending.

Tomorrow I practice with both hands. Once I can play the C Major scale ascending and descending with both hands in unison, I move on to Phase 2, then 3, then to the next scale. With daily practice comes more growth, more transformation. That's exciting to me.

I should mention one kit has not shown any growth at all. It may take more time, or different seeds, or a change in soil. I’ll be patient and experiment with it. Likewise, with any scales that may be difficult. A week may not be enough to memorize an awkward succession of keys in both my mind and my hands. We’ll see.

Here is my scales checklist, based on the aforementioned book:

After I learn a scale, I’ll put a checkmark in the Phase 1 column and post it so you can monitor my progress (we'll get to Phases 2 and 3 later, but if you want to know now it's explained in Zach's book).

I’m still working on the C Major scale, but since this scale is so straight forward with no black keys, I hope to have that checkmark in place by the end of week.

Time meditated today: 40 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 4


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In an earlier post I shared my pre-practice routine of dark chocolate and herbal tea. It’s what I do to create space from the nine-to-five world and prepare my mind for practice. However yesterday reminded me how seemingly unrelated decisions made during the day can profoundly affect my learning.

To be able to practice wholeheartedly and induce a state of flow, my conscience must be clear. My conduct throughout the day must be in harmony with my Christian values if I'm to be successful in music or any creative endeavor.

This passage from Stephen Nachmanovitch in his inspiring book Free Play: Improvisation in Life and Art seems to fit:

The creative process is a spiritual path. This adventure is about us, about the deep self, the composer in all of us, about originality, meaning not that which is new, but that which is fully and originally ourselves.

I'm feeling like myself again and look forward to practicing scales tomorrow.

Time meditated today: 38 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 2


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This mornings, when my mind was fresh and still, I studied the Circle of Fifths and made working model using Rosa Suen's instructions. I plan on experimenting with it more.

Everything went smoothly until late afternoon when I made a decision that compromised my integrity and wasted money I can't afford to spend. The money part I can get over. The integrity part hurts though, and the depression I feel has made it impossible to concentrate on piano tonight. My thoughts are muddy. Words on a page seem like gibberish and practicing scales seems pointless.

Let's see how I feel tomorrow.

Time meditated today: 40 minutes Quality of meditation (out of 10): 2


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