Hey ya'll! Welcome back to the Merge Podcast!

I am getting SASSY today. 👏🏻

You are worth more than what you're currently pricing yourself at.

You are worth just as much as ANY other career.

You are not less than because you create something that is “fun”.

And I'm going to tell you why.

Today is short and sweet but I hope that if you have been discouraged lately that this episode helps remind you of who you are and where your worth lies!

If you like this episode, let me know on my tweet and share the crap out of this episode. It's truth and people need to hear it! 👏🏻

Let’s connect on Instagram, Twitter, Coil and Cinnamon!

If you’d like to be featured on the podcast to share about what you're up to as a creator or developer, or you know of someone who would be perfect, reach out on social media or send me an email, riley@rileyq.com.

- RILEY Q

https://www.buzzsprout.com/790439/2788351

or

So I'm starting a project. A really important project.

Over the past year and a half I have experienced a different type of love that I never thought was possible for me. Yet at the same time the love that I felt for myself lessened more and more each and every day.

It was confusing. Some days it still is.

How could I be so deeply loved by other humans, yet fail to love myself?

How could I know how deeply loved I am by God, yet fail to love myself?

It's frustrating and I don't know the full extent of the answer.

I guess really it came down to the fact that I don't value myself. That's all I can come up with. It's sad and pitiful but it's true.

I've heard many people argue, how could you fail to love yourself when you are loved so deeply? And I agree, it's absurd, but, when you don't think you're deserving of that love and you're constantly tearing yourself down and apart, it's just a toxic cycle.

Paired with the toxic self-love movement our society is obsessed with, it's not pretty. At all.

We have a serious problem. The self-love movement is getting gross. The self-care movement is getting mixed up with it all and is just as toxic. I mean most people cannot even decipher the difference between self love and self care- they're used interchangeably. It's unhealthy and it's sick; it's making us all sicker.

So I am on a mission. A mission to reclaim the self love that we don't understand and that we fail to see. A mission to help redefine what it means to learn to love yourself, even when you really don't. I want to help you, I want to help those around us, and I need your help.

I can't give away the details of this multi-media project, I mean, I have to have surprises too, right?! But I do need some help getting research together.

I put together a little survey, a self-love survey, and it would help me immensely if you filled it out/shared. All answers will remain anonymous. So thank you, I cannot begin to explain what the results of this project could do for those who need it desperately, but I promise it wouldn't be in vain. It takes about two minutes to fill out & I CANNOT wait to share the outcome of this project. It's going to be really special.

xoxo – Ry

https://www.rileyq.com/the-self-love-project

Good morning! I didn't sleep a wink last night. Like seriously not a minute. For some reason I just couldn't sleep and I'm not sure why. I am currently writing this at 4:48 am. I am wide awake and although my last cup of coffee was finished at 3 pm, it doesn't usually keep me up. So here I am, contemplating midnight thoughts and working. Because what else do you do at 4 in the morning, other than, sleep?

I slept 22 hours in the last two days, so it kind of made sense- the fact that I can't sleep now, but I think it's kind of an interesting picture of life.

Some days we are exhausted, completely empty and drained. We have nothing to give.

Other days, we are just dealing. We get a few hours here, a few hours there and we just drift through.

But then we have those days. Those amazing days that are bursting with energy and ideas and innovation. The days we pull all nighters because we literally cannot sleep.

And then we crash. Like I probably will later today..

So how can we avoid this ongoing (toxic) cycle?

We so often focus on the right now, which is good, to an extent- live in the moment. You never now how much time you have left so you want to enjoy the now. But, and it's a big but, if you want to be as meaningfully productive (the meaningful part is key) as possible, you have to be charging yourself up for the long term. You have to be working on yourself, your mindset and your physical, emotional, spiritual and mental health. You have to be preparing yourself, not for what you can do, but for what you can work through and handle. See, it's not about being able to do everything, it's about being able to work through situations and problem solve.

Often we put so much pressure on ourselves to “do it all”. But doing it all often turns into a lot of busy work. When really, all we should be focusing on, is how to succeed even when the odds are stacked against us. You do the work when it comes around to you. You pay attention and know your limits, so when it's time, you can take a break. And once you take your break, you push a little further, with renewed strength and you take a risk. And you keep on, over and over until you can reap and enjoy the rewards.

So rather than burning out regularly, you are preparing and working ahead of time to protect your body, heart, mind and innovation. It's a process. It's an intentional process. A process that can be applied to pretty much every area of your life.

So today, how can you prepare for the long term? How can you keep yourself from burning out?

Have a great day!

xoxo – Ry

Don't let yourself get there- to the breaking point. Establish your focal point for the new few days or the next few weeks and figure out what you can do to fill up your cup. Does this mean establishing a bedtime? Maybe you start leaving your laptop at the office? Or maybe it's as simple as just smiling in the mirror every morning. Whatever YOU need, do it.

Happy Valentines Day loves!

I hope that each and every one of you, no matter your relationship status feels loved and seen today. ❤️

I am often asked if I know how to write an actual love song. Like a song that does include a heartbreak, a breakup, or a song about self-love. Up until last week the answer was no. I am terrible at writing love songs, I always have been. Even though I've been happy and in love for over a year and a half, I still never managed.

But last week for some reason, it just hit me like a ton of bricks. This idea struck and I realized I had to get it down asap. This concept that the person you are in love with is real. For so many years I had dreamt and thought about who the man I would love would be. Although I consciously made the decision to date, love and then marry Dustin, I guess it's just now starting to really settle in. The ins and outs of love are messy and not always fun, but it's real and it's raw and that's what makes it so special.

So here it is. A love song. Hold your love tight today.

xoxo – Ry

https://vimeo.com/391558831/62d6a6c9f8

Real ©Riley Q

It’s real

Your body is real

I can taste your lips

The honey drips.. down

It’s real

Your heart is so real

It lives and beats

For only me

And I wish that I could tell you

Exactly how I see you

But there’s too many moments

And I just want soak them up, up, up

It’s real

Your eyes are so real

They see into my inner self

They challenge me

And help themselves

It’s real

Oh your soul is so real

I see straight through your every word

Your love is real, my heart, it’s heard

And I wish that I could tell you

Exactly how I see you

But there’s too many moments

And I just want soak them up, up, up

It’s real

You are so real

And I’m never letting go of you

I’ve finally found my favorite muse

Nile Rodgers once said:

We are all looking for a way to be successful, are we not?

heard?

What if instead of “doing all the things” and “mastering x, y and z” you could simply be successful by just showing up?
*intentionally*authentically
Success, whether you like it or not is relative.

But in the simplest sense of the word, if you want to be successful and accomplish your purpose-
The number one thing
All it takes is someone to notice, someone to hear and someone to affirm.

If you have been getting discouraged on Coil, stop letting the fear of failure or inability to see results immediately deter you.

Keep showing up.

Keep being consistent.

Keep on.

There is a really special community right here on Coil and I encourage you, if you are looking for a community and a place to call home, Coil is for you. We'd love to have you and your voice will be heard here.
**
xoxo – Ry**

P.S. if you need help...

Getting Started on Coil: A Collection

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