sethstanley

When my daughter said she wanted to visit a chocolate factory for her birthday, of course she already had some pre-conceptions about what to expect...

Coco nibs tapestry? What the hell!

She had already been sold down a river of chocolate lies by that velvet-coated con artist, Willy Wonka. So, when I said “Let's all go to Cadbury World!”, why was I surprised when she asked, “Will there be Oompa Loompas?”

No, kiddo. No, there won't. Sad face emoji.

“There will be no golden egg-laying geese, no little orange men, no everlasting gobstoppers, no obnoxious, spoilt brats stomping around – oh hang on, yeah, there'll be a few of those...”

She didn't look convinced.

Hmm. Who'd have thought a visit to a chocolate factory would be such a tough sell?

“There's a museum! Items from yesteryear that used to mean something to someone! And a lady demonstrating how to 'temper' chocolate! You know about 'tempering' chocolate, right? And a big table where you can write your name in chocolate!”

“Can I eat my name?“

Erm...no. Strangers have been writing their own names with that same chocolate pipe since three weeks last Wednesday.

“Ok, cut to the chase, Dad. When do I get to eat the chocolate?”

“EAT the chocolate?” Hmm. I wasn't really anticipating this question. Kidding! I'm amazed it took her so long to ask.

“It's Cadbury World! You can eat chocolate whenever you like!”

Ah, there's the smile.

Cadbury World is a visitor attraction in Birmingham, England, with a self-guided tour where you can learn about the history of chocolate, and the origins of Cadbury's production business. Oh yeah, and they give you free chocolate while you walk around!

Take it easy with a Cadbury's Caramel

While it wasn't quite on the scale of Wonka's factory, it did have a 4D cinema experience (which was basically a 7 minute Cadbury commercial – but a good one all the same), a huge outdoor play area and a couple of cool interactive shows. We ended up having a really great day and my daughter went to bed with a big chocolatey smile on her face.

My favourite part of the whole day though, was an animatronic gorilla, a reminder of a Cadbury commercial from 2007, still considered one of the UK's favourites now. A gorilla patiently waits behind a drum kit before beating out the solo to 'In the Air Tonight' by Phil Collins.

Right, I'm off for a Dairy Milk and a glass of Fizzy Lifting Lemonade.

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Let's get one thing straight. I don't have writer's block. Right now.

I'm just fascinated by the topic. In fact, I'm fascinated by any mental process that we assume should work 100% of the time (writing, speaking, calculating) and their ability to leave us at the most inopportune moments. Serious cases of writer's block can impede us for months or even years.

I'm fortunate that since I've been on my blogging journey, it hasn't affected me yet. I know it hits all writers at some point and you never know when your muse will desert you. I know one day, writer's block will come for me. And I plan to be ready.

Taking part in the Coil Blogging Blitz ( posting a 250 minimum word post for 14 consecutive days) has certainly focused my mind and encouraged me to have a plan, which limits the effects of writers block.

But it hasn't all been plain sailing and the nature of getting something, anything out every day to meet a deadline means inevitably there have been short periods where my mind's gone blank and I've found myself saying “I just don't know what to write, and I don't know what to write about.”

I love this quote:

There's nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly – R. Buckminster Fuller

Sometimes you just don't know how a piece of writing is going to pan out. You don't know what it will become until it's written. You can't see the bend in the road, until you're driving into it.

The unknown potential of what I might create in any piece of writing is enough to spur me on and get something out onto that empty screen. Anything. Just something to work with will do.

When the muscle memory of typing starts to make characters into words, it gives me something to shape and the act of creation begins. It doesn't matter if what I write isn't perfect. Do not ever let perfect be the enemy of good. You will never get over your writers' block.

So drive towards that bend. Drive fast.

Or at the very least – start the car. Let me tell you what I do to remember how to turn the key.

Coil subscribers! For those occasions when inspiration does start to run dry, here's 5 quick tips below that have always worked for me.

If you're not a Coil subscriber, for shame! Say “I heartily support my content creating friends” 3 times then sign up for an account.

All done? Good. As you were.

Who wants to win some more XRP?

Hot on the heels of my recent Breaking Bad quiz, here's a quiz about the films of Steven Spielberg and an XRP giveaway!

With a big budget remake of West Side Story starring Ansel Elgort on the horizon for 2020, it felt like a good time to do a quiz about the filmography of this awesome director, producer and writer.

With directing credit for more than fifty feature-length films, most of them box-office smashes, Spielberg has surely earned his place among the Hollywood gods.

From wonderful action films like the Indiana Jones trilogy, thoughtful sci-fi like Close Encounters of The Third Kind, Minority Report, War of the Worlds and more personal, reflective dramas that highlight important periods of history, like Schindler's List, Amistad and Saving Private Ryan – Spielberg has covered a lot of ground with his films.

There's something for everyone here – at every stage of their life. I'd have to go a long way before I found someone who didn't enjoy a single Spielberg flick.

With that in mind, let's get on with the quiz!

20 XRP up for grabs for the winner!

Simply DM the answers to the 10 questions below to me on Twitter. I'll pick a winner at random from all entries received before

1700 GMT on Sunday 10 November 2019.

Drew Barrymore achieved child stardom in which 80's sci-fi movie?

On the set of what movie did Steven Spielberg meet his future wife?

How many Spielberg movies has Tom Hanks starred in?

Spielberg has executive producer credits on which popular time-travelling trilogy?

Who plays the title role in Saving Private Ryan?

Which Spielberg film brings together stars from The Walking Dead, Cocktail and Flash Gordon?

Spielberg is credited with writing which iconic 1982 horror classic directed by Tobe Hooper?

A plasticine Spielberg-lookalike barks at Michael Jackson for interrupting his movie set in which experimental 1988 film?

The Adventures of Tintin used which 3D computer animation technique?

Which future Hobbit starred in The Goonies?

If you enjoyed this, you can check out my other quizzes here:

Movie Quiz No 1

Movie Quotes Quiz

Movie Villains Quiz No 1

Breaking Bad Quiz

I love heading to the cinema just before Christmas. Sauntering through town, keeping my head, while all around me are losing theirs. No shopping bags for me – just a copy of Empire magazine and a pair of 3D glasses.

Casually moseying down (oh yeah, I mosey) to the lusciously carpeted lobby. The smell of popcorn (sweet AND salted – half and half) filling my nostrils. The sound of myself crying when I get rinsed for the world's most expensive gingerbread latte at the cinema's in-house Starbucks...

But I keep on coming back, ladies and gentlemen! No matter how disgusted I am by the ever-ridiculous prices, the silver screen keeps reeling me back in!

And so it is this Christmas, with a number of December goodies that already have me donning my elf-ears in anticipation!

Jumanji: The Next Level

The Rock, Dwayne Johnson is back as Dr Smolder Bravestone in this sequel to Jumanji:Welcome To The Jungle (2017). He's accompanied again by Jack Black, Kevin Hart, Karen Gillan and Nick Jonas. Danny De Vito and Danny Glover join the cast.

When Spencer disappears after repairing the Jumanji video game in his grandfather's basement, his friends jump back in to go and save him.

I really enjoyed Welcome To The Jungle – way more than I liked the original Robin Williams movie. The idea of the in-game avatars inheriting their characters from the kids sucked in to the game was genius. It had a lot of heart and some great funny moments. Because of that, I'm excited to see the sequel before the man with the white beard leaves mince pie crumbs all over my kitchen floor.

Spies In Disguise

My next pick is the animated Will Smith vehicle Spies In Disguise. Tom Holland voices Walter Beckett, a teenage Q-alike to Smith's super awesome James Bond style spy, Lance Sterling. When Beckett turns Sterling into a pigeon (!), they need to work together to overcome Ben Mendelsohn's criminal mastermind Tristan McFord.

I love animation – and this has a look of Despicable Me, which I adore. Will Smith seems firmly back on the big screen again, which is no bad thing. I'm an 80's child – there'll always be a place in my heart for the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Whisper it quietly, but Spotify helps me get my fix of Big Willie Style on a semi-regular basis.

I'm also fascinated by the premise of a spy-turned-pigeon saving the world.

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

Well, who isn't excited for this bad boy? Go ahead and raise your hands, non-Star Wars watching population of the world.

The plot is tightly under wraps at this point, but the Resistance will face off against the Resistance once more. The conflict between the Jedi and the Sith will come to a crashing end.

Recent posters have shown 'Dark Rey' wearing outfits more befitting for the Matrix, (top movie-watching tip: that's when you know someone's character has gone bad, they wear black clothes) and of course, the shadowy Emperor Palpatine.

Jeff broke his promise to tidy the living room

Disney have confirmed that the Star Wars movie franchise will be on hiatus following Rise of Skywalker.

If it wasn't for the untimely death of Carrie Fisher, there would have been some amazing lightsabre-wielding screen-time for Leia, revealed as the last Jedi.

As it is, through the magic of CGI, Leia still gets 8 minutes of screen-time. I'm sure she'll kick ass and it'll be a fitting end for an incredible character.

Ok, if you insist, Coil subscribers! One more December release below for you guys!

You can't see it? Oh, too bad – maybe you should sign up to Coil NOW!

It's not too early to write my Christmas list, is it?

I'm a man of simple tastes and needs, I don't ask for much. If Santa Claus has anything at all in his sack for me this year (beyond a FitBit and a top-up for my almost empty bottle of Issey Miyake. Not the Wood Wood one, just the regular one would be fine.) I would hope it would be some new features to play with on Coil!

I've been a Coil user since August this year. As a concept – earning micropayments of the digital asset XRP while folks are browsing my content is fantastic.

As a platform, Coil is in its infancy. Perhaps not even toddler stage yet. There are a lot of great things about it. It's incredibly simple to use, it looks great, and it really allows users to concentrate on the content they want to bring to the table, with minimum technical fuss (or pre-required understanding).

It's also the reason my online family the Content Builders Club came into being. Anything that delivered all those amazing people into my life has to be a good thing, right?

I thought so too.

There are a number of features though that Coil could really use to help it push up to the next level and attract a whole new raft of interested bloggers, who aren't necessarily here for XRP or Ripple news.

1. A way to engage with readers

If the Coil team are prioritising one item, I really hope it's this one. It's certainly my top choice. A blog should be a conversation, not a broadcast. If no other social media existed, we'd all be ranting into the wind, shouting at clouds like Abraham Simpson.

It's only through Twitter, Facebook and Reddit that we're all able to talk to our readers, create bonds, share opinions and exchange knowledge. Which I guess, ultimately, is why we all do this?

2. A way to measure effectiveness of content

How does any human get better at anything? Practice through repetition and feedback. Upvotes are ok, but anyone can just click a button. It's an easy way for someone to tell you they liked your post. It shows no evidence of engagement though. Did they read it?

How do I know which of my articles have held readers' attention? What was the time on site? How many users are looking at an article then bouncing out? I'm not even necessarily looking to Coil for a dashboard with these metrics. Even a way to embed a Google Analytics code would be a start.

3. A way to tag content

Since I've started on Coil, my content has whirled around and gone down avenues I never thought I'd find myself exploring. (Even if you came for movie content, I usually weave some in anyway when I'm not talking about movies.)

Some people just want to read my movie reviews, or look at my illustrations, or read the more personal stuff about my life and that's fine.

Now, if I had a list of content categories pre-defined by Coil, that I could select from, that put my content under the noses of new people who just wanted to read posts about, er...well let's say Coil! I could tag it with the Coil tag.

Users would see a neat list of my Coil posts mingled in with Riley Quin's, Ken Melendez' and everyone else who's voiced opinions about the platform, without ever needing to know I exist.

My other posts about Coil

I have written about Coil previously:

5 thoughts about Coil after Week One

Coil: Understanding User Needs

What's that I hear, Coil subscribers? You want me to keep going?

Well, you're in luck! I have two more things I would like Coil to deliver and I'm saving them for your eyes only!

If you would like to read them, but don't have a subscription, you can sign up now!

As the world braces itself for Jay and Silent Bob Reboot at the end of the month, it's a great time to reflect on the twentieth anniversary of Dogma – Kevin Smith's most commercially successful film to date.

The plot

Bartleby (Ben Affleck) and Loki (Matt Damon) are two renegade angels, cast out of heaven by God (Alanis Morrisette). They plan to exploit a loophole in Catholic dogma in order to wash away their sins and walk back through the golden gates again. Doing so will prove God is not infallible and undo all of creation.

A battle of good and evil ensues, with demon Azrael (Jason Lee) enticing the angels down their path to destruction, while Metatron (Alan Rickman), Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith himself), Bethany, a distant relation of Jesus Christ (Linda Fiorentino), and the Muse, Serendipity (Salma Hayek) are all sent to stop them from destroying humanity.

If you saw the movie, great, you know how it ends. If you didn't, I'm not going to spoil it for you. It's terrific, and well worth catching up with.

The aftermath

Smith is critical of the Catholic Church in this film, accusing it of hypocrisy and selling-out, using the potentially blasphemous 'Buddy Christ' icon as part of the 'Catholicism Now!' campaign to re-ignite interest in the church.

The Catholic League denounced the film as blasphemous and Smith is said to have received a number of death threats. It appears he had a sort of epiphany about his religious beliefs following the sad death of his dog.

The judgement

Not having any strong religious beliefs myself, I really enjoyed the fantasy element of Dogma. There's an all-star cast here, pulling out all the stops and clearly having fun with a great script. Damon and Affleck are particularly good as the leads.

I'm not a huge Affleck fan, but his performance lands well here. Any Jay and Silent Bob film has a number of View Askewniverse and pop-culture Easter eggs hidden away and Dogma is no different. Looking out for those adds yet another layer of enjoyment onto the film.

Knowing the background around Smith's changing religious views at the time brings another dimension to the film. It's a pretty irreverent examination of core ideas that are embedded through the centre of a lot of people. I imagine it's a challenging watch for some Catholics.

But you know what, spiritual enlightenment comes from strange directions. What you know, and what you think you know – it's all up for grabs, and I think it's important to let yourself be challenged in your beliefs. Particularly by a film like this, which aims to provoke thought through entertainment.

I'm sure a lot of people will disagree with me on that and that's fine. I mean, discussion about movies – isn't that what God created apple pie and coffee for?

Coil subscribers! Here's a quick-fire Dogma quiz for you right here – down-pointing finger emoji. You see it? Great!

Oh, you don't? Well maybe you should sign up now! Catch up on all of this wonderful subscriber only content that you're missing out on!

Happy Guy Fawkes Day everyone! Said no one, ever.

But it is Bonfire Night here in Great Britain, the night we celebrate that time that the Houses of Parliament almost got blown up!

Oh, my mistake! It's the night we celebrate Guy Fawkes being apprehended in his attempt to blow up the Houses of Parliament!

Eesh! Glad I got that one straight, could have been awkward....

It's no surprise Fawkes was caught though, I bet he really stood out in that mask....

But before I head off to see the fireworks light up the skies over Liverpool (no sparklers though -NEVER sparklers), it felt like an opportune time to remember a great Guy Fawkes-themed film, V For Vendetta (2005).

The plot

V For Vendetta is set in an alternative post-apocalyptic future (it's never a pre-apocalyptic future, is it?) where white supremacist neo-Nazi political party Norsefire have taken control of the United Kingdom.

Hugo Weaving is V, an anarchist hell-bent on destroying Norsefire who crosses paths with Evey (Natalie Portman), rescuing her from the secret police after curfew.

It turns out V is a subject of human experimentation out to kill everyone who had a hand in how he's turned out.

Over the course of the film, a complex relationship develops between the two main characters and Evey helps V in his anarchic plans against the backdrop of November 5, and another dramatic plot against Parliament.

Themes

The original Alan Moore graphic novel was a response to living in Thatcherite Britain. The film takes a departure from that and draws from real-life examples of government surveillance and corporate corruption for a mid-noughties audience.

While parallels can be drawn between the film and events surrounding the Bush Administration, the film-makers have always maintained that the scope of the conversation they aimed to create around the movie was much broader than that.

The film is not flawless, by a long shot. The smooth-talking, knife-juggling enigmatic V is much changed from the graphic novel, and why Evey continues to support his endeavours does not always feel plausible (particularly . But in terms of the broad themes of the films, it resonated in 2005, and it does even more so today.

Fake news abounds, as does suspicion of big tech corporations. What would V make of the mid-Brexit landscape here in the UK? What of the USA and the increasingly bizarre political circus there?

Maybe he'd send an army of anonymous masked individuals to the politicians' places of work to complain on his behalf. Or maybe like most people, astounded by the daily nonsense, he just couldn't give a Fawkes.

Ahoy Coil subscribers! See below for a fun fact about the Guy Fawkes mask, a shot of fireworks over Liverpool and the reason I can't bring myself to pick up a sparkler on Bonfire Night!

Not a subscriber? Sign up now!

Wow, this title seems kinda clickbaity.

I hope it doesn't bring my Content Builders Club buddies running over here thinking it's some kind of cry for help!

Hopefully by now, everyone's realised this is a Rick and Morty-related post and “I am in great pain, please help me” is of course the Birdperson-to-English translation of Rick's catchphrase – “Wubba Lubba Dub Dub!”

I AM in great pain, in anticipation of Rick and Morty Season 4 which has been announced to air on Adult Swim in the US on Sunday November 10 and Channel 4 here in the UK (but no confirmation of date at time of going to print...)

I am also in great pain that they're splitting the season into two halves! Five episodes will air starting next week, with five more to follow in 2020.

I've been under a rock for six years, what's it about?

For anyone unfamiliar with Rick and Morty, the show which debuted in 2013, follows genius, inter-dimensional alcoholic inventor Rick Sanchez, and his hapless grandson Morty Smith, who is inevitably dragged along on Rick's space adventures.

It fuses zany, madcap, frenetic humour with intricate, big-idea plotlines. It's every sci-fi enthusiast's dream made real. What started out as Justin Roiland's attempt to create an x-rated version of Back To The Future, has spiralled into something quite wonderful. Now it's almost time for Roiland and co-creator Dan Harmon to uncover a new batch of wonders.

It follows off the back of a whole raft of animated series -some for kids, some more for adults – such as Adventure Time, Steven Universe and Bojack Horseman, which operate on several layers. Still brightly coloured and inviting, these shows create much more well-rounded characters, and often ponder more complex, philosophical themes than the 'cartoons' of yesteryear. Bugs Bunny these shows ain't.

Show us what you got

Season 4 promises the return of some of old favourite characters such as the Meeseeks and the exquisite Mr Poopybutthole and a whole host of A-list voices including Sam Neill, Taika Waititi, Kathleen Turner and Paul Giamatti.

Personally, I'm hoping for a return of the show-within-a-show that the Smith family gather around the tv to watch – Interdimensional Cable – an improvised smorgasbord of invented tv shows and commercials.

The titles have been posted for the first 5 episodes – Roiland and Harmon have a reputation for screwing around with fan expectations and deliberately subverting some of the show's marketing, so only time will tell if these are actually real or not.

Episode titles

1. Edge of Tomorty: Rick Die Repeat
2. The Old Man and the Seat
3. One Crew Over the Crewcoo's Morty
4. Claw and Hoarder: Special Ricktim's Morty
5. Rattlestar Ricklactia

One thing is for sure, the show has surprised and delighted fans time and time again. I can only believe that the lengthy delay between Season 3 and 4 will benefit the writing and deliver a treasure trove of intergalactic wonders!

For Coil subscribers below, try out my Rick and Morty quiz! Not a subscriber? Sign up now!

Who wants to win some XRP?

It's been a while since I've done a quiz and XRP giveaway.

The recent release of El Camino: A Breaking Bad movie whet my appetite for a Breaking Bad quiz!

Breaking Bad is an American crime drama that ran for five seasons between 2008-2013.

It follows mild-mannered genius chemistry teacher and cancer patient Walter White and his transformation into a meth-cooking, empire building drug baron. It is widely praised as one of the greatest TV dramas of all-time.

Don’t forget to read my El Camino review [no spoilers] after you’ve submitted your answers!

20 XRP up for grabs for the winner!

Simply DM the answers to the 10 questions below to me on Twitter. I'll pick a winner at random from all entries received before

1700 GMT on Sunday 10 November 2019.

Jesse Pinkman hides a cigarette in his pack containing which lethal poison?

What does Gus Frink give Don Eladio as a gift?

What does Skyler White do to Walt's breakfast on each of his birthdays?

Who kills Tuco Salamanca?

What is Walter White's baby daughter called?

How does the largely immobile Hector Salamanca communicate with people after his stroke?

What is Walter White's 'criminal street-name' that helps protect his real identity?

Who plays Ed Galbraith, the vaccuum-cleaner salesman with a sideline in dealing out fake identities?

What was the name of the spin-off series following Walter White's lawyer, Saul Goodman?

What is the real reason Hank Shrader doesn't want to go back to El Paso?

If you enjoyed this, you can check out my other quizzes here:

Movie Quiz No 1

Movie Quotes Quiz

Movie Villains Quiz No 1