“Sexy Time” Has a Scent All its Own
“J'adore,” or not?
“It smells like sex in here.”
Ever hear that line from a character in a movie? Kind of makes you cringe, doesn’t it?
You know what I’m talkin’ about: The funkified aura surrounding you and a partner after getting busy. Especially after a particularly energetic, bed-squeaking, boots-knocking, leg-shaking, multi-orgasmic sweat session. THE reason a cheating mate will jump in the shower after getting off.
Is it hot in here…?
Remember the song, “Sex and Candy,” by Marcy Playground, with the unforgettable line, “I smell sex and candy here?” With a bouncy beat and lyrics to match, the tune hit a home run with every sexually active person listening.
What causes this particular Eau de F*cking? And is it normal? This depends upon the smell, itself, doctors say. And also, the individuals involved.
According to Health.com, some smell after an aerobic activity, which intercourse is, makes sense. Vaginal secretions, possible semen, lubricants, latex condoms, and two (or more) sweaty bodies are all contributing factors to the distinctive fragrance that makes some people well…squirmy.
So once again, how do you know if the smell emanating from you and your partner is a natural result of two healthy individuals enjoying one another?
First, understand that the smell shouldn’t be “bad” or “off” to you. A distinct musky odor is considered normal. Sweat, spermicides and lubes all contribute to this musk.
Genital pH levels also come into play here. Women’s Health points out that semen is alkaline and vaginal fluids are acidic and when they combine, they create a substance with new chemical properties. That, in and of itself, could cause what is thought of as a “bad” odor.
A noticeably fishy smell is just such an odor. Bacterial Vaginosis (BV) could be the culprit. This occurs when there is an overgrowth of a specific type of bacteria in the vagina. Certain STDs, such as trichomoniasis, can also create a stink. As could a common yeast infection.
Although BV is often symptom-free, some women might notice a thin white discharge along with pain, itching and the fishy odor which, after sex, might be considerably stronger. This is the time to see your OB-Gyn, who can confirm whether an STD or BV is indeed the culprit. If so, he or she will prescribe antibiotics to clear it up.
I mentioned pH levels, and although this piece isn’t targeted to women, only, the thing is, a vagina is well, kind of insular, with mysterious tunnels, nooks, and crannies that can trap all kinds of bacteria. A man’s stuff is just BOOM, right there. In your face. Hanging out for ease of use.
A woman’s pH level down under can easily be thrown off kilter by douching, long soaks in bubble baths (yikes!) and frequent washing of the vulva with soap.
Douching is unnecessary and is not recommended by doctors as a woman’s body naturally flushes out and cleans the vagina. Again, if something smells really off, it probably is and a douche will not solve it. See the doc.
Men, you’re certainly not immune. While you’ll never smell like a peony, a stinky package could be indicative of the following:
Smegma. Yes. It really is a thing. More common on uncircumscribed penises, this is an accumulation of dead skin cells that build up over time, resulting in a thick, white substance.
Balanitis. Irritated skin on top of the penis, some of the primary causes include poor hygiene, skin conditions such as psoriasis and infections.
Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI). The two most likely to cause penis odors are gonorrhea, which causes a green, white or yellow discharge, pain or burning while urinating and an inflamed foreskin. The symptoms of chlamydia are a white, watery discharge, pain while urinating and testicle pain.
Naturally, medical attention is a must for the above conditions and for anything else that doesn’t look or feel right.
Back to the post-sex aroma. Love it or hate it, it’s not going to hang around forever. A shower and a couple of good pee sessions will send it packing. I don’t know. I kind of think it should be savored. Like a good wine. But if you’re worried about it, take note of the foods that can change how you smell down there.
Before your next romp, avoid, onions, garlic, curry, asparagus and anything with a lingering, super-strong odor. Instead, load up on the following:
Yogurt. Filled with friendly bacteria to ward off the nasty stuff.
Pineapple. Both men and women have said that ingesting this fruit makes a woman taste and smell sweeter. All fruits are beneficial here, especially blueberries and mangos. Side note: Watermelon is thought to improve sex drive. I’m in!
Walnuts. Known to improve the shape, movement, and vitality of sperm, according to India Times. Who knew?
Avocados. This fruit’s folic acid energizes the body while vitamin B6 stabilizes hormones.
Chocolate. Increases serotonin and endorphins for a mood boost. It doesn’t affect how you smell but damn, it tastes f*cking awesome.
Eggs. These little gems contain the amino acid L-arginine, which is thought to improve erectile dysfunction.
Coffee. A natural stimulant that can spike sex drive and heighten arousal.
Steak. It contains zinc, vitamin B, iron and protein, all compounds that can help improve libido in both men and women.
Finally, just to compound matters, men can tell when certain women are aroused. Yes. Arousal has its own smell. The resulting essence is unique to each woman. It’s caused by a pheromone, a kind of chemical signal that men can pick up, often without realizing it. And a woman may not even be aware that she’s sending out these signals. Chew on that for a while.
Enough talk. Time to get down to it. And when you’re done, take a big whiff. It’s perfectly natural
“I emitted some civetlike female stink, a distinct perfume of sexual wanting, that he had followed to find me here in the dark.” ― Janet Fitch, White Oleander
Sherry McGuinn is a slightly-twisted, longtime Chicago-area writer and award-winning screenwriter. Her work has appeared in The Chicago Tribune, Chicago Sun-Times and numerous other publications. Sherry’s manager is currently pitching her newest screenplay, a drama with dark, comedic overtones and inspired by a true story.
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