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Okay I think I found another piece of the puzzle.
Okay I think I found another piece of the puzzle.
Desperate Housewives is actually a good show and psychologically correct, gender discomfort aside.
They often have one episode per season about disasters, one of them is a natural disaster. Always made me think about all the storms during my childhood in a small town near the beach I grew up in (not the one I'm living in now).
Sometimes the storms came when there were only two of us at home, as mom was having a shift at the hospital. So I had to go outside looking for adults to help us.
After the whole thing was over, we were all relatively happy in the windy weather, looking for a day off school. While parents reconstructed houses and roads. And heard the news some elderly couldn't make it during the storms. No electricity for a whole week, so we had to rely on newspapers to pass the time. No matter how much I hated my neighbors, they all became oddly kind and helpful that day.
Realize I still have a French house playlist so I don't have to listen to “They don't know about us” on repeat anymore.
I like autumn.
On the other hand, being highly agreeable is not all that socially profitable for the other gender. Having “integrity” is.
The smart ones will have nuanced opinions on everything. Very easy to observe in political space. But the mask always slips when they have trouble separating between responsibility of individual and collective.
Because all the cognitive understanding of how to be an upstanding citizen can't cure an impaired relational experience.
It all started with a group of teenage girls who wanted to prove that “kill them with kindness” was the best motto of all time.
I used to assume they wanted something from me. But I only had 0.5$ allowance so that never made sense.
Come to think about it, they were desperate to convince themselves way more than they wanted to convince me. That they were incapable of hate.
On the topic of receiving bad treatment, I almost got someone expelled in 10th grade.
Oh wait! It was the same kid that I psychoanalyzed in 6th grade.
Give you this candy 🍭
So in 9th grade, my sadistic classmate said this to my face: “I saw your mom at the mid-autumn festival, she is just an ethnic minority”. To which I replied “Yet my mom is still better than yours, and I'm still better than you.”
I was pretty proud of my avoidance. And I think it was an appropriate response. Do I often go around and flex my narcissism? Of course not. But there are people who deserve that treatment. For the same reason you don't want to argue reality with paranoid individuals, or you don't want to apologize to malicious people even if you do have part of the blame: reality is complex and there is no one right way to do things.
So whenever someone says you should treat everyone equally, always be humble, be united not divided. All I see is someone who lacks experience, which makes them boring to be around. Or someone who practices reaction formation, which makes them both boring and unsafe to have any interaction with.
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