What if I'm an academic and I live in an alternative reality? Where I don't want to know people actually get paid to protest and kill? Where I don't want to know politician takes funds off disaster donations all the time? Would my lack of awareness of my own fear and greed cause me disordered?
Probably not. But you better find your dating pool in THAT reality. Because when you try the whole I'm too different I'm too edgy, it simply doesn't work.
At the same time, not many people have the ability to just say insane things in public for not having enough necessary amount of narcissism. My sister thinks it's my actual superpower.
The cue to see if it's the case of being disordered is looking for what causes them shame, and how they MASK it. Because normal people make peace with their shortcomings therefore not to hide it. Their ability to make friends and have stable relationships is the proof of how they can accept reality. NOT the privilege of being disordered-free.
But for people who feel they are not valued enough, they will mask the shame by fighting for the other gender to stop toxic masculinity. People who feel they are not courageous enough, they will mask their shame by cheering for other people to do more violent revolutions.
Yes, maybe toxic masculinity is a thing, and sometimes violent revolutions are necessary. Which is why someone's views about the external world alone say very little, without we also having their confessions about themselves.
So activists popularize the concept “rejection sensitivity”. While it's so hard to draw the connection how rejection has anything to do with ADHD defining symptom at all, which is the ability to concentrate. It's just too convenient not to use it.
Liking someone but also think people who ask for attention is desperate? “I'm too sensitive!” The person fails to catch the hint of you wanting attention causing you shame so you act like they are beneath you just to relieve your shameful pain? “I'm too sensitive!” Too afraid someone you like but don't like you back, so you try to compliment them, validate everything they like to increase your chance while holding resentment? “I'm too sensitive!”
Yes, all of the examples above are about personality disorders.
Oh good luck today too!
But I can't eat too much bread per day, I'll save the other half for tomorrow.
I like banana bread.
So I often hear people say risk-taking is a positive trait that not many people possess and we should aspire to have it to generate more innovation and wealth. Taking risks of what, exactly?
Because the Venn diagram of people who gamble and people who are emotionally unintelligent almost entirely overlap.
Taking risks with your emotions, taking risks with the possibility of being rejected when acting as yourself, offer greater rewards of finding more meaningful connections. At the same time, since you have those more meaningful connections, you would be more careful not to let a failed business adventure take those relationships away.
But if all your relationships are superficial because the only kind of relationship you ever know is either idealization or devaluation, it's not much of a problem to screw people over when your gambling goes wrong. It's risk-averse because idealization and devaluation are two sides of the same coin not to risk people to see you for who you are.
Just because someone seems to have a stable life, doesn't mean they don't take risks. Sometimes even more so than people who SEEM to have an interesting, adventurous life.
The world changed so much in the last 16 hours.
Woke up from my worst nap ever because I took a medication that caused drowsiness last night. Hope the running nose is worth the neck pain.
Never went to a hospital. Never got severe. But I'm like a vampire and sensitive to sunlight and changing weather. As well as neighbors' out-of-tune karaoke.
I used to scream at my neighbors for them to lower their voices so I could do my homework. Then my parents acted all sad and sympathetic for having a high-maintenance child. But they actually and secretly encouraged me to do that so they could still keep their good rep among the community.
I didn't do anything suspicious today. But I need to go to sleep early. See you later.