This is my perception with regards to how women may feel when dealing with mental challenges, self-confidence, and love.

I by no means am speaking for every woman – again – these are just my thoughts and opinion. This can also apply to men, but here, I am speaking on behalf of women who may be too scared to share their thoughts, and am hoping that this article brings them a sense of peace. I am also hoping for the men that read this – they will understand this perception of a woman...

When you are a woman who is coping with mental challenges, you get into a state of mind where you don’t want to associate with other people. You don’t want to be a burden to others. And maybe some just simply don’t know how.

When you are a woman dealing with self-confidence, you worry about the way you look, the way you speak, the way you walk, etc. etc., all in hopes to be accepted by others. You start to avoid crowds and you get wrapped up in your own emotions.

When you are a woman, who has been in and out of love, has been hurt, cheated on, lied to, abused – you lose hope. You lose trust – in yourself and in others.

You find yourself putting up that wall…

And as a woman, you become silent.

BUT, this can all be avoided. How, you ask?

By showing simple acts of kindness.

By showing gratitude, appreciation.

By showing empathy.

By showing support.

By being humble.

By loving.

By Accepting.

This quote here by Audrey Hepburn:

The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.

When you really look deep into a woman’s eyes, you will see everything…

You will see love, you will see pain.

You will see hurt, you will see anger.

But the thing is, it all leads to the *heart*, to *LOVE*…

Anything and everything any woman has experienced, is always felt within the heart.

If a woman is treated with respect, kindness, appreciation, and love, that doorway to her heart will open. The hurt, and the pain that made that door close, it can, and will open. In time.

It needs a chance to be opened. The right person who understands, who listens, who offers support – that is when the door opens. And by looking in the eyes of a woman, deep within, her soul can be searched. And found, once again.

Every woman is beautiful in her own, unique way.

Each woman has a different way of expressing her thoughts, and emotions. All she needs is a chance. Whether it’s a chance at love, friendships, a career – just anything in life.

I think that people tend to forget that sometimes, just sometimes, it’s not all about themselves. It's not all about what's on the outside.

If we, as a society, open our hearts and show kindness and empathy, then we can be at a spot where we are happy. There can be peace if people just took the time to understand one another and appreciate what is right in front of them.

To all you beautiful women out there, never lose hope.

And to all the men, that goes for you too... ❤️

“Let's untangle our mind and set it free...”

And for subscribers, you will see a quote of mine, as well as further thoughts...

I think everyone worries about acceptance, and what people think of them. The way we speak, the way we look, the way we do things. And I mean, why wouldn’t we want to make new friends? Why wouldn’t we want to have someone who we can actually call a friend and be able to confide to?

I have realized over the years, just how precious life, and time, is. I have realized that I don’t have time to be worried about what other people think.

Last night, Mark and I took the girls to Halloween Haunt at Canada’s Wonderland. Since I didn’t think it would be a good idea to bring Mimi (my Canine Vision Dog), I brought my handy dandy stick.

My point in sharing this story is because first of all, I never really take my stick out unless I absolutely need it. A part of me doesn’t want to use it, because like last night, I get a lot of stares. And it’s funny (well, not funny), because when people see the stick, they automatically think that I am completely blind. They automatically judge. And, they automatically get this look on their face – a look of, oh poor girl. And the first thing that goes through my mind is, “really?” The last thing I want, is people feeling sorry for me!

I have a happy life and am very fortunate to be surrounded by people who care about me, and love me, for WHO I am. For what’s on the inside, not the outside.

I don’t know how many times last night, I turned to Mark and said, “Did you see the look on their face?” I mean, who cares? Really? I carry a stick. Yes, I have night blindness. Yes, I have no peripheral vision. But, who cares?!

It does not define who I am.

The girls and I went to use the bathroom, and while in line, my daughter says to me, “Mom, those girls are talking about us.” She didn’t say much at that time, but than after said, “Yea, I think they were talking about you and your stick.”

I looked her dead in the eye, and said, “I really don’t care. I really don’t care what they think and what they say. This helps me, and this is who I am, so they can say whatever they want.”

And that. Was that. End of conversation.

The thing is, if we dwell too much on “acceptance” by other people, and care so much about what they think – that is going to cause us to think less of ourselves. That will cause us to lose confidence in ourselves. We need to accept that what other people think of us, isn’t important. What we think of ourselves is the most important thing!

We are all faced with challenges in life.

We are all faced with struggles in life.

BUT – We are all EQUAL, and we all have our one life to live.

So many times, have I been embarrassed to walk with the stick, and perhaps that’s part of the reason why I decided to get Mimi – to feel acceptance by others in today’s society. With Mimi, I get the “Oooooohhhh, look how cute!” and “Can I pet your dog?”. No, no you can’t. She’s working, and she can’t be distracted. Done.

With the stick, you see, I accidentally hit someone in the leg last night. It wasn’t hard, it was a nudge. I made a joke of it with this guy because he turned to look, and so I said, “SORRY!! It was my stick, honestly!!!” He just laughed and said it was okay!

Those are the types of people who are awesome and who we would want to be around, because trust me, that’s what boosts our self-confidence – our self-acceptance. I saw a lot of dirty looks last night, and sometimes, I would much rather not see those looks at all!

This quote here:

Your time is way too valuable to be wasting on people that can't accept WHO you are.

- Turcois Ominek

You learn to know who you can trust, and who will truly accept you for who you are. Your happy moments, crazy moments, your sad moments, and yes – even your frustrating moments. You are important and so is your time. If people can't accept WHO you are, then why are you wasting your time on them?

You have your ways, your goals, your desires, and even your dreams! Don't allow the negativity of other people or their thoughts of you, bring you down.

You see, each individual is unique in their own way, and that's what makes them so special! But when people judge and they don’t accept you for YOU, it saddens you. It makes you overthink and over-analyze.

It hurts when we are rejected by people and especially when we put so much of our time and energy in trying to “make” or “save” a friendship or relationship. It’s not worth it, really. And so when you think about it, make sure you treat others, the way you wish to be treated! ❤️

“Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”

Here you go subscribers, just a little tip!

Quiet the mind, and the soul will speak.

– Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati

Sometimes, you must take that time for yourself, to calm yourself and gather your thoughts. When you are ready, talk to someone you trust, so that you can “untangle your mind, and set it free...” ❤️

I am one of those people who overthinks a lot.

I was once told – “over-analysis leads to paralysis”.

Now, I know for a fact that I am not alone.

And I also know, that at some point in our lives, we are faced with decisions that we must make on the spot. We are faced with “dilemmas” and we wonder how the heck we even got ourselves into that predicament!

The thing is, we are human. We all make mistakes.

We think that some of the choices we make – in a certain moment – are the right ones, but then they turn out to be the wrong ones – whether it’s the wrong career choice. A relationship. Buying a house. A car. These are all big decisions, but they are your choices AND decisions.

When you stop to think about it – a lot of choices we make, are materialistic – they are “things” that can be replaced, so why worry about it? Really take the time to think about and allow your feelings and emotions understand this – let your soul speak to you...

Try to do the best you can in your current situation. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. It just takes time, and patience.

It is natural to worry, but at the end of the day – if you over-analyze – you’re going to make yourself sick. And tired.

Sick and tired.

So, what are you to do? Are you to dwell on the mistakes you’ve made?

NO! NO!! NO!!!

You are much better than that, and deserve to BE happy, and free of thoughts tangling your mind!

I mean, seriously, how can you learn and experience, if you don’t try?

How can you strive and succeed, if you don’t take risks?

How do you know, if you just sit back and do nothing?

You don't know what you don't know.

Let me tell you something – I wonder about a lot of things. And there are times when I need to pause, and just sit by the river (which is behind where I live), as I calm my mind so that I can block unwanted and unnecessary thoughts.So that I can free my mind from the pain and the hurt I had experienced.

I live in the now and today. And yes, I make decisions “spontaneously” sometimes. But hey – that’s me, and life is too short! Life is what it is.

My past has made me who I am today. The good and the bad. I have learned a lot, and trust me – I am still learning!

Eventually…

You will see, that nobody is perfect.

You will see, that life is what you make it.

You will see, that you are not alone.

There is happiness after losing love.

There is happiness after losing a job, or a house.

There is happiness after learning about a diagnosis.

There is happiness after pain.

Find ways to keep pushing forward!

It's up to you!!

Fill your mind with positive thoughts, and believe in yourself!

Sure, it’s hard. Nobody said anything was easy in life.

But like I said – it’s up to you, to make yourself happy. If you're positive, those around you will feel your energy – your positive vibes, and that in itself creates HAPPINESS!!

Here is a video I created on YouTube – take a peek! I will be uploading it to Cinnamon at a later time (could not upload due to technical difficulties).

How to think and feel positive!!

https://youtu.be/Gc4wmipwNy0

“Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”

For coil subscribers – below is a reminder of what you can do to aim towards happiness ...

Yesterday was a pretty hectic day, hence the reason I did not find the time to write my daily blog. And today, I think due to the fact that I felt overwhelmed, it’s been a weird kind of day. But let me tell you – a text message likes this just

By all means, this message is not to whine and complain, rather to let the moms out there know that they are not alone. We all have struggles, and we all deal with them in different ways. It doesn't mean that we are not capable or that we are not “good” moms.

This article is coming from a mom perspective today because I feel like I need to get out a bit of what’s been going through this head of mine, so yes, I'm untangling my mind!!

This week is our week with five kids. And as most people know, the ages are 12, 12 (almost 13), 13 (almost 14), 14, and 15 – three of which are on the Spectrum. Maybe people know, but maybe they don’t – children who are Autistic DO have emotions, and at the same time, they have different ways of reacting to certain things. As a parent and step/parent, it’s a whole new learning curve on how to balance it all out, so that everyone is happy. So that everyone gets along. So that, so that, so that … and as tough as it can get sometimes, I wouldn't change a thing for a minute!

A little something – one of the special things my daughter and I do (before she leaves for school, texting, before bed, and even “just because”), is:

J – “I love you.”

Me – “I love you too”

J – “Unconditionally.”

Me – “Unconditionally”

Done. End of conversation. Just like that.

And this is her, here ...

My header image is a screen shot from our conversation today, and well, you will see the hearts we send to each other too…! It's unconditional love that I not only have for her, but ALL of my children/stepchildren (the two older ones – 23 and 25 – as well!)!!

But, now, I want to talk a bit about this morning.

You see, I was the vulnerable mom.

After the first set of kids left. I cried. Okay, I bawled. Trust me, I didn’t mean to. I did wait until they were gone, so that counts for something, right?

The morning started by trying to juggle the “jump in the shower, it’s getting late” to helping with clothes, getting lunches ready, trying to squeeze in my coffee so I could get my dose of caffeine. And let’s not forget the disgusting habit of smoking I have – so I needed my nicotine … and trust me when I say, I have been trying to quit over and over for the past, I don’t know how many years. Not quite there yet, BUT, it doesn’t make me a bad person!! It is just something that I turn to so that I can have a “break” from it all, that's all!

Anyways, back to this morning – my husband was outside already with the other two, but as my last daughter left, I could see it in her eyes that she knew my anxiety was coming on. She knew that I was having a rough morning, and that I was about to just let it all go – she heard it in the way my voice crackled “I love you” and the way I was avoiding eye contact...but she was going to be late, so I had to rush her out the door...and needless to say, they all caught the bus in time (mission accomplished!)!

And damn she just knows me too well!!!! She absolutely senses when something is wrong. She is always quick to give me a hug and pat my back!

Mind you, all of my girls can sense when something is wrong. And my husband. And my mom. And my sister. Argh!! they. all. know!!

It’s true what they say – everything can be seen and felt just by the look in your eyes, and the sound in your voice…

I then got my (not so) little one up, and she must have known I was in a mood, because when she did get up, she started cleaning the bathroom which had all of her makeup and nails on the counter. She has been experimenting with the eyeliner and mascara, and I think she honestly does better than me!! But, last night I had mentioned it, and boy was she quick to get it done for me this morning.

You see, when I finally got to have, and finish my first morning cigarette, I came in to see the bathroom SPIC and SPAN! When she cleans, she CLEANS!!I told her how thankful I was for her doing that for me and how much I loved her…and that it meant a lot! And, it helped me a lot – it made me feel good. I’m sure it made her feel really good just knowing that she made me happy! Children really do need to hear it when they've done something amazing! Just that extra makes a world of difference!!

You know, I think in life, we need to slow down. Just really, SLOW down. Whether you have kids or not.

Sometimes, we just try too hard to get everything done at once. We try new things. We help our kids. We teach our kids. We do the laundry. Sweep the floors. Clean the dishes. Take them here. Take them there. Go to work. And don't forget about the pet that you may have to take care of as well!!

That was my morning this morning. I was in a mood that I just wanted to focus on all the things I needed to get done. I didn’t want to have to worry about it later!!

And it’s OKAY, because everybody has those moments. As I sit here writing this out, catching my breath and having my third cup of coffee, I realize that I am NOT the only person who must feel overwhelmed at times. It’s when we feel these things, and we finally get to catch up the next day or next week, whatever it may be, we acknowledge our true feelings. Our true emotions.

And we can appreciate the time we have now. Today.

**Enjoy it, grasp it. Take the good with the bad and the bad with the good - it will get better ...**

I do have to go for now, to continue my day and get the rest of “chores” done before the kids get home. I hope that if you are reading this, you remember that you are just as equally important.

“Let’s untangle our mind, and set it free…”

Have a beautiful day, all. And for Coil Subscribers, a little more insight into my day, and some pointers on what you can do to get past that “overwhelming” feeling!

My article today is specifically focused on Riley Quin, who I've had the privilege of interviewing! For those who are new to the Coil Community, I encourage you to read on to learn about who she is, as well as her future goals and plans revolving around her singing career, her blogging on Coil and her music on Cinnamon, which is all included in this interview!

There is always room to grow, always time to start new things and you’re never ever “starting over”, but simply “building on” to what you already have.

- Riley Q.

We all have hopes and dreams, and sometimes, we do get knocked down. This girl right here – shows us that you CAN achieve your goals, and that there IS hope when you believe, even through life's struggles. She proves this to us on a daily basis through her articles and through her music!! Riley, “Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”.

Interview:

Sandra: First things first, can you tell me a bit about yourself? (Who you are, what you do, your passions, family background...).

Riley: I’m Riley Q – musician, singer, songwriter, blogger, social media marketing and branding strategist and web developer. I have a lot of talents that I am proud of, but none of them have come easily. I graduated high school at 16 and took a “gap year”, this turned into 4 years and I have absolutely no plans to go to college, in my opinion, it’s not vital.

After a very traumatic stalking experience while working as an event planner and secretary at my home church in Michigan, I moved to Nashville, Tennessee. I was 18 and alone. I only knew one person in Tennessee and I didn’t have a job or a plan for one. God provided at the last minute, as He always does, and I was provided with the opportunity to do social media management for a group of women. I ran with that idea and ended up building an entire social media management and eventually web development business. Everything I know is self-taught and I am proud of what I’ve built.

It’s been difficult, but there’s nothing more motivating than a stack of impending bills and lonely nights. Soon after I moved to Nashville I met my husband Dustin. We met online, like every other self-respecting 21st century couple. From the day we met, we have talked every single day and within five months we were engaged and three months later married. He is absolutely the love of my life and my biggest cheerleader. God absolutely knew what He was doing when He sent me to Tennessee. He absolutely knew what He was doing when He created me with the ability to self-teach and innovate under stress. And He abso-freakinglutely knew what He was doing when He paired me with my country boy! Since moving to Tennessee, although my life has been turned upside down, I am pursuing all of my passions full time. Although I do have other passions; baking, painting, photography, fashion and traveling- I am currently spending all of my time working on my marriage, growing in my faith and working my businesses!

Sandra: You are very involved with the platform Coil – can you share your thoughts about this relatively new platform and your hopes of where it will take you with your career?

Riley: Coil IS THE future, 100,000%. I see where we are at now as YouTube in 2006. If you aren’t in on it now, you’re going to wish one day you were. You see, Coil has the newest technology, all of the perks of a successful social platform and they’ve managed to (currently) keep all of the negative aspects of social media at bay. For instance, Instagram & Facebook are ridiculously annoying to use at this point because they have terrible algorithms, an annoying social sphere of Influencers who are dominating the algorithms because they cheated the system, MLM’rs sliding into everyone’s DM’s 24/7, ads EVERYWHERE and the lowest engagement rates we’ve seen since, well, before smart phones existed.

Now I’m not 100% sure what Coil is going to change but as of right now, the fact that we aren’t all thinking about how many comments we get, our engagement rates, knowing WHO is following us, and having the ability to directly message people, it’s refreshing. Now eventually I think Coil should add a messaging ability and maybe comments, but as of right now I love it how it is. There’s less competition, the algorithms are set up to maintain a balance of power, if you’re using it strategically- you can tell how your content is doing based off of upvotes and adjust accordingly, you can actually grow even if you’re brand new and it’s 100% about the content that you’re creating and not about who you’re creating the content for, to win approval. Not to say that won’t change and I actually encourage people to get a solid brand and target market established, that’s why I created my Subscriber Only Branding Series – but for now it’s nice. I can say with great confidence that Coil is exactly what many people have been waiting for and I believe that the more that we as a community step outside of the community and share about our experiences with this technology and companies such as Coil and Cinnamon, that we will see these platforms take off.

For instance, as soon as I started sharing regularly about Coil & Cinnamon, I had 7+ people sign up for Coil & Cinnamon almost immediately. People want these platforms, it’s up to the early adopters to share about them. Again, I understand that can be difficult for some people, which is why I’m sharing my templates as free downloads for anybody who wants to share on their socials but doesn’t have the time/skill to create graphics and explain in a concise and coherent way. They’re available in my posts about sharing Coil or you can DM me for them!

Sandra: In your article “Married at 19: 3 Lessons I've Learned”, you wrote freely about your anxiety, depression, and life struggles. How did it make you feel when you wrote that particular article?

Riley: Ah yes, I was really proud of that article. I actually went in planning to simply talk about our love story, but as I unpacked it I really started to realize how much the underlying themes of my depression and anxiety played a part in our story. Like I said in my article, anxiety has always been something I’ve struggled with but depression has been a newer addition to my mental cocktail. I know for some, talking about their trauma and struggles can feel paralyzing, but for me it truly helps me to heal. When I verbalize that something is off it helps me to compartmentalize it and deal with it one issue at a time. I know that writing about these topics helps to shed light on the topics and shut down the stigma that people who struggle with mental health are “crazy”, “attention-seeking” or “annoying”.

People often forget that mental health actually has to do with one’s HEALTH. I personally feel like the more we talk about it, the more we can understand one another and the more we can band together to help each other heal.

Sandra: What is your favourite thing about your musical career? What song do you feel resonates with your audience, and why?

Riley: It’s hard to choose just one! I love the fact that I get to work for myself, write music 24/7, collaborate with other incredibly talented musicians and that I get to help people re-write their stories!

I personally find myself writing about a lot of struggles and things that as humans we find ourselves naturally dealing with. “Stitched” was about dealing with trauma, specifically in the sense of sexual assault, stalking and the anxiety and depression that accompany it. I wrote “No Turning Round” about realizing that life is freaking hard and we make bad decisions, but regardless you have to keep moving and realize that you can’t turn around and change what’s happened. And if you don’t get up and move on, you’re gonna lose it from the inside out. My newest song that drops on November 1st, “B Ok” is about the struggles that I’ve had with social and mental anxiety, social media and trying to accept myself, regardless of how I’m feeling.

Like I said, because I’m writing about a lot of common struggles, I feel like each song resonates with my audience differently. I know a lot of people really connected with “Stitched” on a personal level because of how many men and women have experienced sexual assault, abuse, and trauma. Although this breaks my heart I was proud and honored to give them a voice and to help them in their journey of healing. I think that “B Ok” will be very impactful in a similar way, I’m excited to see how my fans like it!

Sandra: Where do you hope to see your music career going? What platform do you believe will help you the most to help achieve your goals? And why?

Riley: Oooo girl, in this house we dream big. Dustin and I are already planning our trips, what mission work we want to do and talking about my dream stadiums to fill!

But seriously, Dustin has really taught me to dream big and think outside of the box. Walking into the world of technology and XRP specifically, I’ve had to let all inhibitions about money go. God is good, He’s providing every step of the way and I believe that as we are good stewards with what He’s giving us now (time, money, opportunities) He will give us more and more opportunities! With that being said I will never put it all on one platform. If you want something you have to hustle hard for it. This means being everywhere and doing everything with high integrity and class.

I am on every social platform that I believe is worth my time and energy. I create content for Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Coil, Cinnamon, YouTube, Spotify, Apple Music and my website. I might eventually add TikTok and Snapchat when it becomes relevant for me, but for right now these have my highest ROI in mind!

Eventually my music (business) goal is to expand my business to artists, create safe havens for them to come and create, options for them to stay independent and be a part of changing technology. As for personally I plan to stay independent and self-fund my music projects. Eventually I would love to play festivals and events that are worth my time, I don’t believe in touring just to tour. I want to always be the best steward of my time and resources so when I have an opportunity to play a show and it’s because I have fans to play to and not simply to make a few bucks, I’m down and ready to go!

I’ll let you in on a little secret though, my biggest unspoken dream is to one day be on Ellen. I don’t know why but I absolutely love her and for me that’s the pinnacle of having a platform! I love how she gives back and that is my #1 goal with my platform, to constantly be giving back. That’s why I love to use my Coil platform to support new and small artists, give business and blogging advice to newcomers and I try and use my other platforms to highlight and encourage those who need it. We all need a cheerleader and just because you have influence does not ever make you “too good” to be a cheerleader for someone else!

Sandra: As The Mind, Untangled., where I hope to motivate and inspire people with my writing – I feel that you as a Singer/Songwriter are hoping to do the same. What would your advice be to those who are starting a new phase in their life? Do you have a song that could help someone push through their dark moments, and what would it be?

Riley: Girl, I love this question! I love how you seek to motivate and inspire, I absolutely believe you do. You stood out to me from your first article, “Staying Strong, even through the darkness...”!

Like I said before, I absolutely hope to inspire and encourage others. To those of you who are just starting off, no matter your age, state of mind, circumstances, career path- there is always room to grow, always time to start new things and you’re never ever “starting over”, but simply “building on” to what you already have.

Even if you feel like you’re starting over by trying something outside of your wheelhouse, you’re simply adding on to the skillset you already have and to the lessons you’ve already learned. As humans we were never meant to just choose one path and follow that religiously for the rest of our lives. We get one life to live and we might as well do every single thing that we dream of doing! The key is to finding the sustainable routes that support the other dreams.

Before I got married, running a social media business was the sustainable dream that fueled my dream of getting married and doing music. Now it’s Coil and my business funding my life and my music career! Eventually my music career will be funding my other business ventures, the mission work me and my husband want to do, travel and any other dreams that come out of the woodwork between now and then.

My point is, find something you love to do and do it. If that doesn’t feel right anymore, choose something else. But don’t just give up everything, build onto that and add onto it. You can have both your dreams and financial security, you just have to be smart about it! As far as the song goes, I rely on a lot of worship music to get me through my darkest hours, so I’d say “You Say” by Lauren Daigle often reminds me of my worth. Secular wise I’d say that music to my specific situation or anything Lizzo always lightens the mood!

But seriously, I listen to my own music or play it to feel better. “Stitched” has helped me through a lot of rough times as has “B Ok”- the one that’s coming out in November. People laugh when I say that, but if you’re not making music that you love to listen to, what are you doing?!

Sandra: Who do you look up to? What inspires you to keep moving forward?

Riley: This is a hard question because it’s recently changed. I used to look up to a lot of people and take advice from a lot of people. Not so much anymore. Recently I’ve realized that the more I outsource my energy to other people for reflection, the dimmer my light becomes and the more I actually end up drained. This has left me simplifying my sources of inspiration to life giving individuals. My favorite musician, currently, that I look up to is Lizzo. She gives me so much freaking confidence and she puts me in the BEST mood. My favorite Instagrammer right now is coffeewithrach because she pours the best truth and life into my heart, that girl is filled with the spirit! I love her!

I’d say ultimately though, I look up to the individuals in my life who have displayed humility, courage, kindness and who are learning right alongside me. People move me forward. People’s stories and how I impact them make me keep moving forward. When things get hard, Dustin keeps me moving forward. Our future children and grandchildren keeps me moving forward. The people that I can help with my future abundance keeps me moving forward.

Ultimately – Jesus keeps me moving forward. He gave me a specific mission and purpose and I’ve got to own that. I’ve been chosen and called to be a light in this world, to sing my heart out and to love on people fearlessly. If I don’t do that, imma be in big trouble! But seriously, whenever I feel like giving up and I feel myself losing motivation, if I ask & trust Him, God steps in and provides. He has never left me hanging. Regardless of how broke I’ve been, how low I’ve been, how far I’ve wandered away, He always leads me back to the path that He’s created for me. I honestly don’t know where I’d be without Him because He has always provided everything I need RIGHT when I need it. Not a moment early and not a moment late. People sometimes ask me why I believe, but I simply tell them that I’ve seen too much not to. So what really moves me forward? The knowledge that when I do what God asks me to, great things happen.

Riley, thank you SO much for allowing me to interview you! You are such an inspiration to so many of us!!

And for subscribers and XRP enthusiasts, a little something extra – Riley's answer to my question – ***"In your opinion, where do you see XRP and the ecosystem going in the next five years?"***

SURE, there are going to be dark clouds crossing your path to the clear, blue skies. But baby, once you GET there, it will be SO worth it. KEEP trying! KEEP soaring! You've got this!!

- Sandra Scala

Never give up on your path! It’s crazy because when you get in a mood where you don’t want to go out, when all you want to do is stay home and keep to yourself, you start tangling your mind with unwanted thoughts. You start asking yourself questions, that shouldn’t even be a question.

There have been times in my life, where I thought, what the heck am I going to do when I lose my vision? It is so unpredictable how fast it is going to deteriorate, and when I do get new bruises, I know that the tunnel is getting narrower. When the nighttime is darker, I do know that the tunnel is getting narrower.

BUT, I came to the point where I can’t let that stop me. If you knew me a few years ago, I was sad a lot of times, and perhaps angry too. I don’t think I showed it too much, because I was that girl who always hid the pain behind the smile.

The fact is, everyone goes through some kind of pain, at some point in life. And, everyone goes through hard times. But we are not alone. Yes, it sucks when you are in that “dark cloud” moment, but you keep on trying, and you will SOAR. You will be where you want to be in life. Slowly, but surely.

When I think about my situation, it’s not a BAD thing I’m losing my vision, really. Yes, it's unfortunate, but that’s why I try to enjoy life as much as I can NOW. See as much as I can. Do what I enjoy most.

There are others out there who are going through a battle that no one really knows about. And a lot of those battles, sadly, are worse than my situation. But if I can shine over the darkness, get past the dark cloud moments, one daty at a time, then I GET there! And, it has been SO worth it!!

Remember, it is only impossible if you make it impossible.

“Let’s untangle our mind, and set it free…”

Below for the subscribers, is something I wrote a while back, sharing my thoughts on this quote by Robert Brault: “Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got.”

“When you are happy with yourself, you are happy with others.

- Sandra Scala

It's not about being happy for others. It's about making sure you are happy with yourself, and WITH others – including WHO you are, who you surround yourself with, and what you are doing! ❤️

If you are always happy for other people, then how do you expect to be happy yourself? You are only going to find yourself in times of loneliness, longing to find peace within. You cannot make everyone happy. Focus on yourself, your family, and your goals!!

Here, is a picture of me and my baby girl. She just got me laughing so hard, and even though sometimes, it is tough being a mom, the rewards of being a mom is an absolute blessing!

I find when I am in my happy and laughing moment - they are double happy, and that makes me even more happy! There is that saying, “if Momma ain't happy, nobody's happy.” How true is that?! My hubby reminds me of this every so often!! And sure I'm guilty of my moments – it doesn't make me a bad mom or a bad person!

Today, I am sharing a story about a blind mouse and an elephant. The story shows the bond between the mom and the daughter, and the kindness from an elephant.

The moral of the story is -

Sometimes, action speaks louder than words.

SHOWING kindness is free, and can seriously, help those who are feeling lost and lonely. You just have to trust yourself, allowing you to trust others, in order to pursue happiness, and truly find what you want and need in life!

Subscribers – in my story below, this stands true.

“Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”

Header Image:

Mouse Photo by: Yunu Dinata on Unsplash

Elephant Photo by: David Clode on Unsplash

A smile is the best makeup a girl can wear.

- Marilyn Monroe

What truly defines us?

Well, clothing doesn’t define who we are.

And looks don’t define who we are either.

Nor does a fancy car, or a big house.

Sure, it feels good to dress up, and “look” pretty.

Fancy suit, beautiful dress, and all.

Sure, it feels good to put makeup on and “feel” pretty.

However, not everyone can afford to live luxuriously.

And not everyone can find the time, or energy. Not everyone wants to change who they are, in order to please others. Not everyone wants to hide their identity, in fear of being ridiculed.

Some people choose to pretend.

Some people choose to change.

And some people do choose to hide.

But why? This should NOT be!!

Why should materialism matter?

We have choices.

We have the choice to follow our dreams.

We have the choice to be kind.

We have the choice to lend a helping hand.

We have the choice to say yes, or no.

AND, we also have decisions to make.

We make the decision to follow our dreams.

We make the decision to be kind.

We make the decision to lend a helping hand.

We make the decision to say yes, or no.

Do not allow fear to take control of the choices you’ve made.

And continue to make.

Do not allow fear to take control of the decisions you’ve made.

And continue to make.

Do not allow fear to tell you that you are not good enough or strong enough.

You ARE good enough and you ARE strong enough.

To handle whatever it is, that may cross your path.

Sure, there may be bumps (and big ones).

But you have survived this far.

Yes…you ARE a survivor!!

Be proud and hold your head high.

Take control of the fear and do not let it consume your inner beauty.

It’s your INNER BEAUTY that defines you.

Not a sickness you may be fighting.

Not daily or life challenges you may face.

Not the negativity of others.

It’s not the size of your body.

It’s not a pretty dress, or a fancy suit.

It’s not a fancy car.

And it’s definitely not a big house.

Believe in yourself.

Your choices. Your decisions.

Your way of life.

And don’t ever think less.

Here I am, in this picture, not wearing any makeup and just comfy clothes. This is me, on a daily basis. Some days, I put some lipstick and eyeliner on. Most days, I'm. just. me., with a smile!

“Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”

For subscribers only, I share some more writing and a poem I wrote today, “Just a Girl”, one that I will not be sharing on any other platform...thanks for your continued support!

Sometimes, you just have to really look at yourself from the other side, to find the courage you need, to break free from your anxiety and your fear...

- Sandra Scala

Break free from that cage – and try to find a way!

As frustrating as it is, when you feel like you are at a dead end, feeling trapped – sometimes, you really do just have to LOOK, long and hard, at yourself and ask, “is this who I really am? Is this where I want to be?”.

Nobody is perfect.

Life isn't perfect.

Figure out what you want AND need, and find a way to let it go ... trust me, in my past, when people told me to just “let it go”, it really bothered me. But when you sit and think of it, it makes total sense to not let your mind get all tangled with unnecessary thoughts.

If you ever find yourself in times of trouble, take a deep breath – take a moment to look at the things you DO have in life – and push yourself to just go for it.

Try your best, and keep pushing forward.

Trust yourself. Believe in yourself.

Life is too short to be trapped for too long.

“Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”

More thoughts and quotes below ...

Today, I will write about anxiety and share my thoughts and some quotes which I find to be inspiring. Here is a short poem I wrote, a little while back...

“Don't judge me for my silence,

as I try to block my fears.

Don't tell me I have issues,

Cause you may not see my tears.

Just hug me, hold me, keep me near.”

- Sandra Scala

Anxiety and depression can really take its toll on someone.

Mentally, emotionally, AND physically.

Someone who hasn't truly experienced these feelings, really don't have a clue as to how it feels. Therefore, they really have no right to judge. It's not right, and it's not fair. Especially for those who seriously cannot stick up for themselves, or just don't have the energy to stick up for themselves.

In my opinion – the last thing you want to say to someone who is feeling anxious or depressed, is that they have issues. Telling someone that they are crazy or ridiculous only pushes them further away, especially when they are already trying so hard to pull themselves up. It only pushes them to think that maybe they are wrong. Maybe they did the wrong thing. Maybe they are not good enough.

I believe that the best thing you can do for someone who is going through a rough time, is to just be there for them. Appreciate them for the small things that they do. Love them for being who they are. Help them to breathe. Help them to talk about what is going through their mind.

Help them to express their emotions and their feelings. They may not want to, but that's okay – if in that moment they can't or don't want to, talk – give them their space. It doesn't mean you give up on them; rather, assure them that you will stand by their side. And don't stop trying to help them – bring it up in conversation again ... sooner rather than later.

A quote by Gandhi:

You can't change how people treat you or what they say about you. All you can do is change how you react to it.

There may be people who treat you badly. There may be people who just don't “get” you. They may say bad things – whether it's to your face or to someone else. You just have to learn how to ignore those people. Leave them, because those are the people who are going to bring you down. Change your reaction, and just let it go. Let it be a lesson learned and a part of your past. Do it for yourself, and those that you love.

Remember – always have hope - find the strength and courage to keep moving forward. If you have to take a step back, don't worry so much about it, just find a way to do what you need to do, to be happy with yourself.

Trust yourself.

Love yourself.

Go for a walk, do some writing, singing, dancing. Do the things that bring joy to your life – play with your child(ren), relax with your furry pets, cook, clean.

Do whatever will help YOU to find yourself again!

And for those who are supporting the ones going through mental health challenges – just remember that the person just needs you to understand. To understand that sometimes, they can't control their thoughts.

**A quote from Dan Millman:**

You don't have to control your thoughts. You just have stop letting them control you.

Here is another clip of my talk from Ottawa. Take a peek ...

https://www.cinnamon.video/theminduntangled/watch?v=166454412326209271

Just remember – if you know someone going through a rough time – hug them. hold them. keep them near. It means so much, and could make the world of a difference to them.

“Let's untangle our mind, and set it free...”