Warm Gold Light Shining Through My Blinds
The light is starting to feel different again. The way I see it is changing. The way it strikes through the air. It's as if something is more alive in it.
I noticed it laying on my bed, listening to a lecture. Something in the light changed. It became full. But I'm not sure what it was full of.
It felt like being in a redwood forest, streaks of sunlight cutting through the branches. Carrying a quality. As if the light was filled with heart. Or a thousand silent songs.
Have you ever experienced it? Like when you were a kid, watching the sunset. The light filling the air and filling something in you too. Filling a place you didn't know was empty.
Leaves you feeling alive, the light imprinting itself on you. And even if you don't realize what's happened, you carry it with you. And it never leaves. Because it's always been there. The full light, in you.
Maybe the light was always there to begin with. So deep you forgot about it. It's easy to forget about it. Until it comes to you again, whispering in your ear, Of course I'm still here. How could I ever leave you?
And how could it? Because on some level, it feels so close to you. So close that there is no way to tell that it isn't you.
You hear the light in your dreams and in music. You feel it when you cry or kiss someone you love. You feel it walking alone, silent. It's everywhere and nowhere.
I first noticed the light was changing because I felt something in me changing. Something coming out from being held in. Slowly, simply, and with no effort at all.
Sun shining through the blinds, making the entire street a bright and burning gold.