China Sends US Crypto Regulators Thank You Letter

Showing that they are both cunning opportunists in the digital age as well as polite, appreciative players in the game of global financial control, China issued a 'Thank You' letter to U.S. regulators Wednesday for their complete and utter lack of regulating cryptocurrencies over the last ten years.

“They are asleep at wheel for decade,” said Xi Jinping, General Secretary of the Communist Party of China, Chairman of the Central Military Commission, and President of the People's Republic of China. “And we thank them so greatly for this very special gift.”

China's leader Xi Jinping applauding the United States for allowing China to “fly in like powerful dragon and dominate new digital financial world” by not establishing crypto-regulations over the past ten years.

By not embracing blockchain technology and digital assets like XRP in a serious and expedient fashion, Jinping feels the US has missed their opportunity to work with innovators and cultivate the technology in a sensible way that will benefit the free world and allow them to maintain their global financial edge.

“Oh, with no doubt, they are f**ked,” said Jinping to XRP_Productions reporters. “We are in driver's seat now. They screw proverbial poochy on this one.”

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