luciouva

I don't know what Jake see in Oceanna that made him so enthusiastic to know her name. It's just a name, but I guess Jake wants to know more than just her name.

“Hi,” Jake sudah menunggu di depan kelas Oceanna saat jam sekolah usai, ia berlari dari kelasnya yang berada di pojok kanan dan kelas Oceanna di pojok kiri.

Oceanna hanya menatap Jake yang sedang berdiri di samping pintu dan berjalan sambil berkata, “i already put your sweater on your locker.”

Jake segera berlari untuk mensejajarkan dirinya dengan Oceanna, “who said i was going to ask you about the sweater? and how do you know my locker?”

“First, nobody, and second, I have my ways. So, bye Jake,” kata Oceanna dengan cepat.

“So what about telling me about your name?”

Oceanna tiba-tiba berhenti di tengah jalan, “we didn't really meet, you've planned to find me, so no name.”

“Okay, you'll meet me without any plans. Kalo kita beneran ketemu tanpa sengaja, do you promise to tell me your name?”

Oceanna menatap Jake bingung, “and how would you know?”

“I didn't,” Jake berjalan meninggalkan Oceanna sendiri di halaman sekolah.

“Really Jake? All this for a name?”

Jake menengok ke belakang dan tersenyum, “it's not just a name, it's your name.”

He left Oceanna with a bunch of questions on her mind, and one of them said “what's wrong with him?” She didn't really think much of it at school and go home.

But I never said she didn't think of it at home, questions about Jake seem to stuck in her head. “What a weird guy.”

After the odd incident in the library, Jake kept coming back on the same day and the same hour in hope that he will meet the unfriendly girl. It's been 4 weeks and he never sees her again. Jake tries to find another way to find her, which is asking his friends.

Jake has many friends, well he's nice, smart, and he's really polite. He started to describe her to his friends but none of her friends really know. Jake is so lost in his thoughts that he doesn't realize someone is sitting in front of him.

“Jake, hello?” Callia melambaikan tangannya di depan wajah Jake karena ia sedang melamun.

“Huh, oh hi Cal, kenapa?”

“I see someone is drowning in their thoughts,” Jake tertawa, “so what are you thinking?”

“Oh iya, you can help me with this,” Callia menatap Jake dengan serius, “so i met someone di perpus and she hasn't told me her name and I kinda want to know her name.”

“Uh-huh, lanjut.”

“I'll try to describe her, okay? She has long straight black hair, big eyes, a slim nose, and has a mole on her left cheek. And I think she likes to read, cause I saw a harry potter book di samping dia kemaren.”

“And did she take a nap di meja ketiga dari pojok kiri?”

“Uh... yeah, how did you know?”

“Duh, she's my friend.”

“Sekelas sama lo kah?”

Callia mengangguk, “her name is O-”

Jake menutup telinganya sambil berkata, “no don't tell me her name, I wanted her to tell me herself.”

”...okay.”

Jake berdiri dan mengambil sampahnya yang ada di meja dan segera pergi dari meja, “ok, thank you Callia, see you later.”

“Dummy, I wanted to talk to you longer than this...”

“Finally,” kata Oceanna lega setelah dua orang siswa yang tidak berhenti untuk menggombali satu sama lain sejak Oceanna masuk ke perpustakaan.

Oceanna hates her school, even though she has no reason to hate it. But the air conditioner at the library surely made Oceanna come to school almost every day. She does like reading, but she's here for a nice nap.

Took seconds for Oceanna to reach her dreamland and this is not the day to take her precious nap. Someone dropped a book from the top cabinet, and it's definitely a thick book because the sound woke Oceanna.

“Please just let me take my nap,” Oceanna menutup telinganya.

“Hi, sorry, lanjutin aja tidurnya,” kata seorang siswa dibalik kabinet buku.

Saat Oceanna kembali memejamkan matanya, ia kembali menjatuhkan buku untuk ke dua kalinya. Oceanna bangun dan menghampiri siswa itu dengan wajah yang masam.

“Mundur, gue ambilin. Lo mau buku apa?” kata Oceanna dengan kesal.

“Geografi semester lalu, dan sejarah semester lalu,” kata laki-laki tersebut.

Oceanna mencari buku yang ia maksud, and i guess it's her lucky day. Buku geografi yang ia mau, tertumpuk dengan 5 buku lain yang terlihat berat. Oceanna mengambil kursi yang ia gunakan tadi dan gunakan untuk mengambil buku yang ada di rak atas.

“Pegang,” Oceanna memberi beberapa tumpuk buku ke siswa yang tadi. “Why is it so freezing? Tadi kayaknya adem aja.”

Oceanna menyerahkan dua buku yang siswa tadi cari. “Here, and please leave. Hurry, i just wanted to sleep.”

“Okay, thanks. Oh iya, my name is-”

Seorang guru masuk ke dalam perpustakaan dan berjalan ke arah mereka berdua. Bu Selvi, guru yang memang ditugaskan untuk berkeliling saat jam pelajaran, untuk menangkap anak-anak yang bolos di jam pelajaran, seperti Oceanna contohnya.

“Jake, kamu ngapain disini?” Bu Selvi menatap Oceanna curiga. “Kamu bolos ya?”

And Jake to the rescue, “gak bu, dia disini bantu saya cari buku buat tugas yang dikumpulin nanti.”

Bu Selvi yang percaya omongan Jake langsung berpamitan dan pergi. “Jangan lama-lama disini, nanti dicariin.”

Oceanna ingin berterima kasih kepada siswa yang bernama Jake ini tetapi terlalu malu karena ia tadi bersikap menyebalkan kepadanya, “hey, i'm really sorry for my annoying ass, but thank you.”

Jake tersenyum, “sama-sama, I guess you already knew my name, Sim Jaeyun but everybody calls me Jake.”

“Okay, nice to meet you, Jake. Now I'm really trying to take my nap, so can you please not drop any more books?”

Jake tertawa kecil, “sure, oh iya, here.” He gives her his sweater.

“No, take this, I don't want it.”

“Pake, biar gak kedinginan.”

“Okay, thank you.”

“Well, at least tell me your name,” Jake belum juga pergi.

“I'll tell you my name when we meet again, now go,” Oceanna memakai sweaternya dan mulai memenjamkan mata dengan tangan yang menjadi bantal untuk kepalanya.

“Hi, sorry aku telat, macet.” Jake duduk di kursi di depan Oceanna. “How are things lately, maaf aku lagi sibuk. Kamu udah pesen makan? Kamu potong rambut ya ce?”

Oh, how she will miss his chatty side (to which he only shows it to her). “Aku udah makan tadi,” raut muka Oceanna jadi berubah menjadi serius, “i have something to say.”

Mungkin ini perasaan Jake yang sebenarnya mungkin sudah tahu arah pembicaraan Oceanna, but he chose not to go there. “Kamu mau bilang apa?”

He already overthinks the worst that could happen in his favorite place to eat in 40 seconds. Pikiran-pikiran negatif yang terus bermunculan di kepala nya, dan ada satu pikiran yang ternyata sudah terlintas di kepala nya di perjalanan tadi.

“Aku mau putus, Jake,” she said with a straight face, but how can she do it? I guess that's what she has been doing for the past 3 days, practicing. Even though it's not really working.

Rasanya seperti semua organ di perut langsung turun tiba-tiba ke lutut. He already prepared for the worst yet he's still isn't ready. Well, who would? Jake tidak mengeluarkan sepatah kata dari mulutnya dan hanya menunduk ke bawah. Melihat lantai dengan perasaan lemas, kaget, panik dan perasaan lain yang sulit dijelaskan.

She started to worry because he shows no expression yet she felt everything that he's feeling. Until he finally looked at her in the eyes, with his glimmering eyes that she will miss so much to look at. He smiled with the pain showed in his eyes.

“Jake please say something. I have my reasons and I know you know that I didn't want to do this but I still have to. Jake-”

Jake memotong pembicaraan Oceanna, “Ce, jalan-jalan naik bus yuk. For the last time.”

“Kamu gak mau denger penjelasannya?” she tries so hard to calm herself.

“Yuk, takut kepenuhan Ce,” Jake berdiri dan berjalan duluan ke luar.

Oceanna stares at her ceiling and saw the memories throughout the year with Jake in her mind. The sound of the rain outside completes her emotion and tears start to fall down her cheeks. The word sick and tired never across to her mind, at all. That's how much she loves being with him.

Love is a strong word and feeling, yet it couldn't fix the invisible hole in their relationship. It's not mundane, it's not sick of each other, it's time. It is time to go in their own ways, have space and time to think what's best for themselves, and let go. No one said it was easy and it took her time to finally made up the decision to break up.

“Maybe this is what we need,” she sees herself in the mirror, “this is all for the best, right?”

Oceanna gets up and heads to the bathroom to wash her face. She didn't do it because it's time to wash off and put on her skincare, but it's to hide the tears that can't stop. “Jake, aku minta maaf.”

“Mba Claudia kabarin dulu Ce,” kata Jake mengingatkan.

Lima belas menit yang lalu, Jake membuka pengumuman Oceanna karena ia tidak berani membuka untuk dirinya sendiri. “Aku udah kuatin mental dari jauh-jauh hari,” kata Oceanna. Tetapi waktu Jake menyuruhnya untuk membukanya sendiri, tangannya langsung gemetar.

Oceanna dan Mara diterima di kampus yang sama, entah mungkin semesta sedang berbaik hati. Kampus yang Oceanna dan Mara pilih bukan universitas yang mudah. Sedangkan untuk Shaka, entah. Anaknya masuk ke kamar mandi untuk mengecek hasilnya sendiri dan tidak mengatakan apa pun, mukanya datar saat keluar. Kalau ditanya pasti akan dia akan berkata, “tunggu aja, biar jadi kejutan.”

Jake sekarang sedang memotongi kue yang ia beli tadi karena Mara sudah meminta sedari tadi. Mereka yang ingin melihat pengumuman, Jake yang siap. Jake bahkan sudah menyiapkan kata-kata menenangkan jika suatu ketika ada yang tidak berjalan sesuai rencana.

“Eh iya, itu tadi yang grebek itu maksudnya gimana?” tanya Oceanna sambil memakan kuenya.

Mara yang sedang makan pun teringat lagi, “jadi tadi gua sama Shaka kan lagi duduk di warkop, terus tiba-tiba di sebelah warkop tuh lagi di grebek.”

“Ya berarti kalian gak di grebek dong?”

“Ya enggak, cuman gua sama Shaka panik gara-gara di cek juga warkopnya. Yaudah kita kabur, eh malah dikejar.”

“Kenapa gak berhenti terus jelasin kalo kalian cuman panik?” tanya Jake.

Shaka langsung tertawa, “hehe gak kepikiran.”

Jake dan Oceanna menggelengkan kepalanya heran. “Terus kalo misalnya kalian diikutin sampe sini gimana?”

“Gak Ce, santai aja. Gua sama Shaka udah sering dikejar-kejar, udah handal banget masalah beginian.”

Mara dan Shaka memang terkenal suka terlambat dan akan masuk tanpa izin dan berujung dikejar satpam. Memang sih jarang tertangkap, tapi akhirnya mereka berdua selalu dipanggil ke ruang BK.

Oceanna lays soullessly in her bed, with her head and heart having a war. Should she tell Jake or should she let Jake just have some fun with his friends? Cause for the past (almost) 3 years, all Jake does is worry about her and deal with her problems.

Set aside the constant petty fight, Jake is also going to a university in Australia, one of the best ones. And Jake has a life outside of his relationship with Oceanna. She's ready to back up if one day Jake said it's over. Lo menyedihkan banget Ce, kata Oceanna dalam hati.

Oceanna bangun dari kasurnya malas karena mendengar bel dari luar. “Siapa sih? Gue lagi berantakan banget and I'm not ready for a guest today.”

Saat Oceanna membuka pintunya, terlihat Jake dengan sekantung plastik berisi kue. He has the biggest grin on his face, but Oceanna just stare at him and then leave him at the door without saying anything.

“Oce...” kata Jake pelan. “Maaf aku bercanda doang, mana mungkin kamu sendirian pas pengumuman.”

“Iya yaudah,” kata Oceanna tidak bersemangat.

“Really? You didn't look like you forgive me.”

“Emangnya aku mesti keliatan kayak gimana Jake? Pengumumannya is less than an hour,” Oceanna sounded irritated.

“Sorry, I was being so insensitive. It's okay calm down, whatever the result is I'm proud of you,” kata Jake dengan tenang. “Nonton film aja yuk biar makan waktu.”

Oceanna dan Mara beserta beberapa orang yang ia tidak kenal sedang duduk di sebuah lapangan basket indoor. Jake asks Oceanna to watch him play basket ball out of the blue. It's very unclear why her school is playing against other school.

“Kita udah lulus tau, kenapa tandingnya sekarang deh?” kata Oceanna sambil menatap Mara yang sedang sibuk memperhatikan teman-teman sekolah nya warming up.

“Namanya juga orang gabut, nonton aja Ce. Tuh semangatin pacar lu,” Mara menunjuk Jake yang sedang memakai sepatu.

“Jake doesn't even play basketball, why would he have a basketball shoe?” Oceanna sejujurnya tidak terlalu memahami basketball, all the rules, and all the technical terms that they use. But she's here anyway, watching Jake (and his friends) tanding basket.

Saat semua pemain sedang bersiap-siap untuk tanding, Mara menyenggol tangan Oceanna dan menunjuk seseorang. “See the girl in white?”

Oceanna mengangguk sampai Mara melanjutkan omongannya dan berkata, “she has a crush on Jake since forever.”

“Wait i kinda know her, itu temen smp dia bukan sih?”

“Yup, Claire.”

Oceanna doesn't really want to ask Mara more about her. If she doesn't find out her curiosity will only grow. But if she finds out, she'll know at least something will make her feel jealous and be in a bad mood for the entire game.

She tries to forget her thoughts, of course, the bad ones. As she cheers for her school and screams even harder when Jake scored. She saw Claire is also clapping her hands and jumping up and down when Jake scored.

The game ended with a score of 36:24. Her school won and the MVP is the unexpected Shaka Maheswara. Oceanna dan Mara turun untuk merayakan kemenangan sekolah mereka. Maybe it's not the most official or important game ever, but they do look so happy.

“Asik, ada yang ternyata jago main basket nih.” Oceanna memberi Jake sebotol minuman dan disambut dengan senyuman Jake yang lebar sampai ada sebuah tangan lain yang menjulurkan sebotol minuman yang sama.

“Here's for you Jake,” kata Claire dengan senyuman yang manis. Oceanna is not going to lie, she's really pretty with her brunette hair, deep dimples, and big dreamy eyes.

Jake menengok ke arah Claire dan menerima minumannya, “thank you.”

As soon as Claire leaves, Jake langsung memberikan minumannya pada Mara. “Nih Mar, tadi gue liat-liat lu semangat banget teriaknya.”

Mara mengambil minumannya dan segera berterima kasih sampai akhirnya berteriak, “TUH JUNO LIAT JAKE, GUA KAN DATENG BUAT LU MASA GAK DI KASIH MINUMAN?”

“Kenapa di kasih Mara?” Oceanna's face starts to look gloomy.

“Aku kan dari tadi mau nya didatengin kamu, nungguin kamu bilang congratulation. And then said that i rule the game, bukan mau didatengin cewek lain,” jelas Jake dengan suara yang pelan dan lembut.

Months have passed and Oceanna has been waiting for Jake's result anxiously. She's sitting on her bed and constantly checking her phone to hear something from Jake. Her bubble of thoughts popped when she heard a bell rang.

“Hi,” Shaka showed up with a bruised face and scrapped arms.

Oceanna langsung menyuruh Shaka duduk, “anjir lo kenapa?”

“Jatoh, pas gue mau pulang. Terus, dipaksa sama orang yang nabrak buat berenti dulu. Ya gue bingung, gue mau pulang gak boleh. Terus gue keinget apart lo deket sini, so here am i.”

Oceanna sibuk mengambil obat-obatan di kabinet yang tinggi, untill Shaka give her a helping hand. Keep in mind, Shaka is much more taller than Oceanna.

“Duh mending lo duduk aja deh,” she looked overwhelmed.

Shaka langsung kembali ke sofa, “sorry, seenggaknya gue bantu apa gitu. Gue kesini aja tiba-tiba and the first thing you ask is gue kenapa bukan gue ngapain kesini.”

Oceanna sibuk membersihkan tangan Shaka yang tergores cukup dalam and rub ointment cautiously. She grabbed an ice pack and give it to Shaka.

“Tempelin di muka.”

“Random juga ya, lo nyimpen ice pack buat apa?”

Oceanna gives Shaka a glass of water dan duduk di sampingnya, “Jake tiba-tiba beliin karena gue suka kepentok sana sini.”

And he came, Jake came. His smile turned upside down when he notices someone is sitting beside Oceanna. “What happen to you?”

“Jatoh, and it's my cue to leave,” Shaka stands up and grabs his jacket. “Thank you for everything, and see you later man.”

Jake menaruh sekantung plastik penuh makanan di meja makan dan duduk di samping Oceanna. He didn't ask a thing and turns on the TV.

“Aren't you going to ask me something?”

“Aku keterima Ce,” kata Jake pelan.

Oceanna tries to hide her unhappy face, “congrats, do you want to do a toast? I have grape soda, we can pretend it was wine.”

“Oce...” kata Jake halus. “Aku bingung mau sedih apa seneng.”

Oceanna bangun dari sofa dan berjalan ke arah kulkas, “no sad vibes here.”

They both are having the most uncertain feelings ever. But at least Jake is better, he's true to himself. He didn't try to push his feelings away, not like Oceanna. He was prepared but he never said it doesn't hurt.

“Ce...” kata Jake. “For this one time, can you at least stop hiding your feelings? If you want to cry then cry, if you're mad then show it. Jangan diem aja Ce.”

“Makanan kamu keburu dingin.”

Jake memeluk Oceanna cukup lama hingga Oceanna mulai merasakan rasa pegal di kakinya. Dan cukup yakin kalau makanan Jake sudah tidak hangat lagi. Sudah lima kali Oceanna menanyakan kapan ia dilepaskan tetapi Jake terus mengabaikannya.

Jake finally let go of her, “kamu masakin aku apa?”

“Salmon, udah gak panas kayaknya,” Oceanna berjalan menuju ke sofanya. “Ada minuman di kulkas.”

Jake menyusul Oceanna dengan sepiring makanan dan gelas di tangan yang satunya. “Kamu kapan belanja lagi Ce?”

“Lupa, minggu lalu kayaknya.”

“Sama siapa? Kok gak ngajak aku?”

“Sendiri. Kan kamu lagi sibuk, makanya sengaja aku gak ganggu,” Oceanna menyalakan TV nya dan menonton one of her favorite Disney movies, Tinker Bell and the Pirate Fairy.

Jake is pretty blue because Oceanna didn't text him for quite a time and she didn't ask him to the supermarket. Jake loves going everywhere with her, especially to the supermarket doing grocery shopping.

“Ya jangan cemberut dong, kan sekarang aku jadi gak mesti apa-apa sama kamu,” niat Oceanna ingin menenangkan Jake but it'll just make it bad. “Nih-nih kesukaan kamu, Fawn.”

Jake tersenyum tipis, “aku jadi suka Silvermist deh.”

Oceanna menatap Jake dengan muka yang sebal, “ih ngikutin aku.”

Jake didn't say a thing, he just gazed at her. She's growing, she no longer needs him. Call it selfish or anything, but he kind of didn't want her to grow because she'll get over him. He just can't let her go. No, not now, or will he ever let go?