10-6-20
there aren't that many people who KNOW that they are broken (and that the world is broken). there are even fewer who understand HOW and in what way they are broken (and that the world is broken) and what that brokenness means. and there are very, very few who can FEEL their brokenness.
and then there are the ones who can BEAR the feeling of being broken, who experience their brokenness on a daily basis and who are not consumed by finding a way to transcend that brokenness, to do something about it.
once you see and feel and experience the brokenness of the world, which really means the brokenness of the human beings and its effect on the world, and the brokenness of the self, it makes you into an outsider.
when you remind people of the brokenness of the world, either by saying something about it and asking to talk about it — or not — you are rejected by people. most people don't want to see the brokenness of the world, or they have seen it but they try to avoid having to look at it and/or being reminded of it. kierkegaard knew this and so did nietzsche.
and this means you suffer because being rejected by people who don't want to see what you and i might (and should) call the truth, hurts. it is difficult. it is alienating. it might cause you to doubt the truth of what you have seen, felt and experienced.
you feel dejected. it is so obvious, zo vanzelfsprekend*.
*the dutch word 'vanzelfsprekend' is used in a similar way as 'self-evident' or 'obvious' but it is subtly different. it literally translates as 'it speaks for itself'. so in this sense it is not about evidence, it is not an objectivist or logical statement. it is about speaking (and listening) and about something speaking and it is speaking to you.
the way i think about it is in a way similar to kierkegaard. he writes about this in sickness unto death (in a much too complex way imho).
there is the zone of ignorance. you might call it the zero zone. here you are blissfully unaware that anything is wrong. you are like a cow in a field, ruefully regurgitating the contents of your seven stomachs and masticating.
zone one = you know or suspect something is wrong but you don't know what it is exactly or you are still working it out or thinking about how it works or perhaps it is simply doubt (twijfel) and mostly you can ignore it or you can do things to distract yourself so you don't think about it or you do so unconsciously.
and this is : zone two
welcome to the second stage! (i don't much like the idea of progress or a path — probably because it is such a cliché but it is the case that zone one is a prerequisite for entering zone two). now one of the eleven dimensions has opened up to you ha ah ha this sounds like such a bunch of new age bullshit but bear with me let's try again : a perspective has become available to you and it is dazzling, not so much or perhaps it its beauty though it is sublime but it is above all, a tragedy of immense proportions. now you can see all of humanity, not just the 7 billion that are here now but the 100 billion that came before, and what the human species has done to the world and everything in on and of the world and to each other. the cruelty the ignorance the violence the suffering.
it is overwhelming. hold on to you horses. it is so big ...
but the thing is you are not alone. i am here. for a limited time only! so make the most of it. but know that i am here for you to make use of.