Finding Joy

I’ve started to appreciate the low points in my life.

As a little girl, my grandma used to say…

“God loves you.

She gives you problems because she has great plans for you.”

As a little girl, it was nothing short of absurd.

“How can someone love you and give you problems?”

It is only today that I realize what this means.

Only the ones who love you, care for you, and are vested in your success can do that for you. Think of your mom, your favorite teacher you learned so much from, chances are they commanded respect because they were tough.

Tough love is also the strongest and most meaningful kind of love.

I’ve tried to make it easy to become someone spectacular. But it never happens. Not rarely, never. It’s a 100%

I’ve had a ton of low points in life. Presumably like you.

One of the biggest and harshest symptoms of your low points in life is that you start to identify yourself with that situation, that dreadful phase.

It possesses you in a way that you become that.

And as they say, you attract what you become.

You start seeing more of those low moments and then harsh self-talk that engulfs you even before you can realize what you are doing to yourself.

The worst poison of all.

A fresh perspective

In one of my therapy sessions, I learned about the concept of being an Observer.

When you observe, you step outside of the situation and start to see the same situation you are in from a different vantage point. – A fresh perspective.

Much needed, right?

As this hit me I started seeing my anger, my frustration, my victim mentality – ‘Why me?’ from a whole new dimension.

Then it became easier to become my own coach, my own guide.

My biggest realization

Whatever is happening in your life, is not you.

It’s energy that will come and pass away. Nothing is permanent and will never be.

Just observe.

Let it flow.

It is only when you observe that you find it easier to let go…

Finally…

It is anything but easy to step outside the situation to become the observer. You need to be aware first. And sometimes it’s someone else to shake you out of the situation. Welcome it.

After all it is this awareness that can take you places.

“I’m considering leaving the startup space.” – so I told a certain someone who has been a veteran in this space.

Without a doubt, I was sure I’d hear the following..

‘No, don’t jump to conclusions. Take your time.’

‘Don’t let an experience define you and who you are. Be brave.’

I heard none of that.

Instead, I heard an honest, blunt,

“Might be a good call.” followed by “Meet people and then make a call.”

What lingered below that comment I wondered.

Am I not fit for it? Why is this a good call?

After a few follow-up questions and then some reflection, here’s what I learned:

Playing to your strengths

Giving yourself the time to think, evaluate, and most of all honest reflection on your journey so far is so critical.

Having someone by your side is important to show you the mirror, and give you unadulterated advice.

But then, isn’t this what I know? That’s all I have done all my life?

That’s the scary part, starting afresh. Doing something different and starting off all alone.

My idea might be new, and the business likely different, but my skills have evolved as a founder, a business person, and most of all human path I travel. – My purpose.

Let’s see where life takes me