Frankology

Have you ever noticed how quickly everyone is to claim another party is lying? No matter how big or small the issue, automatically it has to be the other party.

Here is something to consider before you assume lies. In order for lying to make sense, the liar has to stand something to gain. If there is nothing to gain, it's fair to assume they are telling the truth.

This is reliable for perpetual liars too. They believe they are gaining recognition by their hyperbolic stories. Or if they have something to hide, this too is a form of gain. If someone finds them out, there will be negative consequences and so, the gain is in avoiding these consequences.

I'd love to say this is a concept I came up with but it isn't. Tim Ferrous mentioned this on a podcast, which exact one I cannot remember. I'm sure too there must have been many before him.

Anyway, the strategy is to either stop reading the news altogether or at least read only the headlines. In Tim's case, he went for the latter from the newsstands on his way to work, or as he commuted around town. In most countries, like South Africa where I live, this isn't really an option. Our travel is vastly different and we don't have newsstands. Also, it's 2018, so it's digital all the way.

The part that makes this work: if it's really that important, of actual consequence, you'll hear about it from someone else. The rest is just chatter. Clutter which impedes freedom of the mind, decisiveness and creativity.

“You can't just stick your head in the sand and hope it goes away,” I hear them say. Well, try it and let me know if it made any difference to the issues being reported on. In fact, I challenge you to tell me it made any difference at all – period.

The cause and effect only touches you, the consumer of the news. It has no direct effect on any issues being considered and your indefinite, total exclusion, will not prevent the world from spinning. If anything, you will feel less stressed, and in a position where independent thought processing is possible.

The news influences us in ways we never imagined. We consume more of it now than we ever imagined. What was once a vehicle for information has become a tool for persuasion. If nothing else, news clouds the water, making it ever more difficult to know which way to swim to reach the banks.

It's true what they say, irrespective of how cliché, smiles are contagious. Here's a fun game to prove it.

Next time you fly, make sure you get an emergency exit seat. This will ensure the attendants will give you the safety drill “production,” just to be sure you don't muck it all up and cause more chaos when the time comes.

Proceed to look the attendant directly in the eye and smile like a fool. Whip out the biggest, goofiest smile you can muster. You are 100% assured of getting at least one real smile back. You may even get a chuckle and a chain reaction from the other folks attending the recital.

There are no prizes for feeling terrible. Likewise, there are no prizes for abstaining from things you enjoy because somehow convention says you should.

During a routine Sunday drive to a favourite wine farm, my wife and I got into a conversation about how we would both enjoy a beer at the craft brewery (situated conveniently on the same wine farm). When we arrived, there was live music on offer which instead of adding to the day (we both very much enjoy live music) we immediately, mutually, decided the beer was a bad idea. Beer plus music plus Sunday equals bad.

Obviously, beer and music on Sunday is not a bad thing, unless you decide it is. The point is, we decided it was bad and so denied ourselves the pleasure. Did this affect our day in any way? Yes, it did. Did it affect our Monday in any way? No, it didn’t. Are we any better for it? No, we are not. Did we get a prize or any recognition at all? No, we did not.

While it might not always be a good idea to throw caution to the wind, sometimes you should simply ask yourself: why the hell not? What’s the worst that can happen? Life is for the living and waiting until we are old, or older, for the rewards will probably result in disappointment. You need only observe older folks to see this.

Never get involved with a cheat. If someone can cheat in a game of cards, a video game or at quiz night, they are a cheat.

I once was visiting a training facility where they had the 10 most important rules displayed on the wall. The one which stood out the most went something like this: nobody cares what you lifted, how many reps you managed, or what you put on the board. Everyone cares if you cheated.

(The other one which stood out was: don't be a chalk whore, but this is unrelated).

A cheat will cheat at everything. If they can cheat, they will lie and if they lie, they can steal. This is true on every level.

The beauty of the simple innocence that is a child's mind is delightful. How very sad that we lose our sense of wonder for everything in the world.

My son is potty training. Without boring you with too much detail, he took what I can only describe as a monumental man-dump “all on his own,” the other day. The sheer scale of it was nothing short of intimidating. He then proceeded to call everyone in the house to come and marvel at the size of it. When it was my turn to conduct the viewing, I rounded the corner and there he was without pants, hands on knees bent over his creation, with a genuine expression of achievement on his face. What a spectacle!

If you are not a parent, you will not get it. If you are, it was hilarious and I hope that if you've never yet had the privilege of admiring such a momentous thing, that your turn is still coming.

High fives all round!

My broadband provider is a comparatively small, privately owned affair. I couldn't say exactly how many people they employ, but I would guess the number to be between 50 and 80. They run in the region of 10 external teams or vehicles and have a moderately impressive presence in the area.

Of all the people employed there, I know at least 8 of the internal-technical-assistance representatives, the office manager and an additional 3 external guys – by name.

As I have repeatedly assured many of them, this is not due to a lack of friends on my part. The reason I know so many of them, and them I, is because I'm on a call with them on average once a week. The reason for this is service delivery.

If I'm expected to pay on time for x-amount of speed and consistency, they are expected to deliver.

Now, you may think (as have some employees indicated before) I sit here all day running speed tests hoping to catch them out. I do not. I have work to do and plenty of it. Only after repeated line drops or noticeable speed issues do I contact them. Of course, at this point I would have completed the obligatory, “did you try switching it off and on again.”

The point is this: if I am on a call with them on average weekly, and only when absolutely necessary – due to interruption of workflow – how often are they, in fact, delivering below average service which we fail to notice? More than this, how many people are uninformed to a degree they blindly accept the subpar service?

What is the point of trying to pin a percentage on the possibility of rain? Why not simply indicate whether it will rain or not? Better yet, the amount of expected rain.

This is what I check, and it turns out it is correct 100% of the time. The rest of you run around in all-weather-gear based on a 30% chance of rain. You do realise this means there is a 70% chance that it will not rain?

We all know predicting the weather is a difficult thing. There is no logical reason for making it even more difficult by trying to attach a percentage to it.

Sometimes the convention is wrong.

“Just give it time, it's just because you're not used to it.”

How many times haven't we heard this? Getting used to something which looks, feels or is shit, doesn't make it any less shit. It just makes you complacent with shit.

Place a bag of shit in the corner. Leave it there for long enough and you'll get used to it. The smell will diminish, you will slowly stop noticing it there, until you no longer notice it all together . Does this mean it's no longer there? No. It means you're a weirdo who lives with a bag of shit in the corner.

One day you wake up and suddenly every small-timer, big-timer, get-rich-quick-timer is making “money.” It's not generating income I refer to, it's actually making “money.”

No one can deny blockchain technology is useful, will be useful for a long time to come, and will play a role in the future, but, it is not money.

Fiat currency is legal tender backed by governments who issue them. Cryptocurrency is a token. A token who's value is not backed but rather agreed upon by many. A token bought with, here's the kicker, fiat currency.

The notion of a non governed currency is a noble one, truly it is. It means freedom from these godforsaken governments, but in reality, there is exactly zero chance of uniting all on earth around an idea of this nature – or any idea at all.