The world today The world I knew as a kid even a teenager is gone it does not exist anymore. The value of family, friends and yes our relationship with the lord has depleted. The people who fought are long forgotten by those who take being an American for granted. Being an American citizen is not represented by a skin color or language. Being an American is to be free to build invent grow to evolve into new eras. The time we live in there are many people who do not want this. They want sheltered individuals who can not choose for themselves too rely solely upon them. Remember what has been accomplished by regular people trying to make the world better not just attending to their own agenda. We are divided as a country and lied too often. They created a world with no love not religion and not unity. Debates on social media drive the narrative we fall into the trap daily. Oh and if you’re wondering who I am? Well I’m a no one just was taught to observe listen and asses any situation and draw a conclusion and this my friend well that’s my conclusion.

The past never was supposed to define my future. I run from it. I hide and stay in the shadows hoping no one will know the truth behind who I am, and why I am the way I am. The web of lies is 17 years in the making. I do not choose for my children to know who their biological family is. I created a new family a new life and believed it was my own. My kids don’t know the dark that lies beneath. They have everything I was never given the chance to have. Well that is till now when everything feels like it’s all getting taken away again. I have to be the best parent and keep them warm, safe, and teach them that nothing is free in this world except our love. I am afraid that we will be truly homeless soon and that my kids will be taken from me for trying to do the best I can we are just so far in debt from past rent. I just want to buy a house own something some day. Be something but I don’t know where to begin. I was never given the opportunity to explore what do I want to be when I grow up.

To turn a life into something is hard. Growing up in a rough home and not trusting those who were supposed to protect you. How does the system not understand they didn’t make it so we had anything to start our lives with. Thrown into a world with not even the proper tools to live on your own. We don’t have any family and resources to help they let you go to figure out the world with foster parents. Again people in your life one doesn’t know and doesn’t know if they can trust them. Pain was endured by those swore to protect them and now complete strangers are supposed to be able to do the same. One feels isolated removed for everything. I went to high school and was embarrassed because they didn’t even provide a proper education for me nor was college even mentioned. I went a different route and had three wonderful children but now I am 33 years old and have no skills and never got the chance to know what I’m supposed to be. I don’t know where to begin I’m so broke I can’t I am $15000 in debt and still have to struggle. They don’t even give any funding to the children we got to work for allowance that wasn’t even enough to buy anything. It’s crazy how I have no clue what to do with my future because of my own past.