Being the silent voice of reason

OH YOU HAVE NO IDEA I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED LET THERE BE FIRE!!

In most situations, self-talk is patient and insidious. Not the brute villain but the manipulative one: Tiny little pushes in the right direction, deflection of counterpoints. Leading down a narrow path. HOW DARE THEY?

But as always, there are exceptions. We just left an argument, things were said – I'd say too much, but George thinks NOT ENOUGH, YOU JUST WAIT! LET'S GO BACK IN THERE AND TELL THEM HOW IT IS!

He's raging. I can feel him, running circles inside my head. And of all things: I myself am rather clear-minded now. Things got heated and emotional but having some distance – time and location wise – I can assess the situation. We could talk this out like adults. OR WE SCREAM AT THEM UNTIL THEY FINALLY UNDERSTAND

My apologies for the caps but they are a most fitting symbolism for my feelings. I understand my situation, I would like to (honestly) get things settled but I'm shaking. My heartbeat is up, I'm physically ready to fight or flight, and as much as I want to: I can't calm down. BECAUSE TODAY'S THE DAY! SADDLE THE HORSES! THIS IS RIGHTEOUS FURY!

No George, it's the fury of righteousness and the difference matters. In your case, we might even call it self-righteousness, what do you think? DON'T PLAY GAMES WITH ME AT TIMES LIKE THIS!

Oh, I'm not playing games. I'm waiting. You need time to cool down, I get it. You opened the shelf of JUSTIFIED (ok, justified) anger and a lot of other things fell into the stew as well. Now it's a boiling mess and still too hot to fish out what doesn't belong.

BUT... BUt... But.. I am in the RIGHT here. Don't you want us to win?

I want us to win our battles! Not to lose them by biting the referee. I get that you enjoy being angry right now but what's right will stay right and can wait. Don't narrow your options to a single line of attack!

.. Can we... at least stomp out of the room? And slam a door? Ok, but don't break it. Are you kidding me? I love that door! I only want to make a bit of noise. They don't even need to hear it, just me. Fine, lead the way!


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