Hold my stakes
This week, George was again very lively and active. I could end the narrative with A project of mine ended and calling it a “rough landing” would be quite the understatement but then I play directly in George's hands. You see, it was indeed a “rough landing” but mainly for myself and of course George. And since this is the hub of the wheel, let's have a look on both sides.
So for George and myself:
- I didn't start on time
- I basically didn't start at all
- And without written proof I probably haven't even finished
- I didn't plan enough
- I didn't plan at all
- Even if, my plans aren't good anyway
Each of those two and similar trains of thoughts ultimately spirals down the pit. And the vicious clever communicator that he is, George uses the word “even” at the end of the spiral. The word “even” adds futility to injury. “You didn't do X but even if you had, the outcome wouldn't have been better!”
Why calling this manoeuvre vicious clever? Adding futility to injury removes insult. Who's to blame if the race was a lost cause from the beginning? “Better listen to me next time!” Well no, George, you gaslighting little imp!
Let's instead listen to the stakeholders and their views
- “The project finished as 'success”
- (Meaning the project finished)
- (And was considered a success)!
- “The audience is grateful for my efforts”
- (As above, take a short breath at grateful)
- (And at efforts)
George hates taking those short breaths at individual positive words (he's a restless and relentless one) and instead urges me to point out to you all that the audience couldn't grasp the entirety of the project, unable to even decide between success and failure, and is therefore incapable of judgement and praise.
And here I take another short breath looking into George's restless and relentlessly expecting face. So he gets a reply. “Now that is your case? That the stakeholders I wanted to make happy can't even (Yes, I'm trying to use the very same word against him) decide how difficult it is to make them happy and therefore when they end up being happy they aren't qualified to acknowledge their happiness and the fact. that. they. are. happy ???”
< Silence >
George, get lost! Yes, I didn't start on time. Yes, I didn't plan as much and as effectively as I could. And yet I made it to the finish line. Sweaty, barely breathing, and incredibly hungry. My jeans are stained, my shirt is torn and I'm in desperate need of a shave. But I made it to the finish line.
That's not a failure, it's a starting point for the next run. And I better work on my smile for a less sweaty photo finish.
Next post: “Just a flesh wound” Last post: “Time is relative – so is importance”