thaison

I figured it out.

It's a great way to dodge accountability. Since your action is always a reaction to the “society”. And not come from your agency entirely.

For example, I post the DM because I don't like the guy, also he dares to disagree with me. I post for others to see. When I get the backlash. I have 2 options: – People tell my action is horrible. I agree with them. I feel bad because I caused public humiliation to another person. – People tell my action is horrible. I disagree with them. I feel bad because people reject my way of living and behaving. I feel bad for the rejection.

But if the “society” tells me I have to behave quietly and say thank you to someone I hate, and I choose not to (because society is a whole lot of people and not one person so it says a lot of things). Then with the backlash, it's not about my behavior anymore, it's about how other people react to a culture phenomenon that I disagree with. So I can never truly lose.

See, it's all about how you frame it.

Borderline don't seem to understand how people choose to react to a situation.

Because when I make a decision of what I would do, I think about if I'm interested enough to keep engaging to the guy, if my public exposure cause more annoyance for myself, if I post and get applause from my friendlist and it makes me feel less bored for the day. I don't think “Oh society is scary. They say I have to smile and suffer in silence. So I will do the opposite to restore justice”.

I know another borderline who frequently criticized social media as superficial, shallow,.. Yet they used it frequently and posted regular pictures, daily thoughts. And then they cried in their private blog that if it wasn't because the society force them to use social media to keep the appearance of a normal person, they wouldn't use it.

Don’t worry about “theory of mind”. It’s a thing when people want to insult you. For example, “You should know saying this to a girl is offensive! You have no theory of mind!”.

In reality, you guess everything. And you don’t expect all your guesses are correct. But a normal person would just tell you what they think so the guess work is unnecessary. After all, isn’t it what love and friendship offer? A sense of secured affection that you don’t have to question secretly their motives or expiration, as opposed to how we often do with strangers?

I went to a museum once. They didn’t have street food outside. Kind of boring.

And it is a test too. Because if someone look down on you simply because you express enthusiasm and investment then that’s narcissism for they see every relationship as binary winner-loser. And when you express slight disagreement but overall politely inviting to further discussion and they get angry over that then that’s borderline. So she thinks she has the upper hand because the other person has zero defense but they are the one to get correct answer about who she is as a person with a simple test here.

So funny I just saw a story of a girl publicly humiliating a guy for DMing her to discuss her thesis after seeing her at the museum. Because I did the same thing as the guy did and it worked well for me. Highly recommend for everyone else to do that. Stupid girl thinks she is out of his league because he is more enthusiastic than the usual avoidant douche men then that's really her narcissistic problem.

Hello Marten.

*special kindness*

I don't want generic kindness where the person is nice/polite/pleasant/helpful to everyone.

No. I want special treatment. Me on top of everyone in the pyramid. Me getting a solid treat. And all other people are fighting for scraps.

See, this is why I was looking for a Chemistry tutor with emotional understanding and kindness. Because I was very familiar with educated pricks. Education, no matter how high it is, is the bare minimum.

Sometimes, people (her social circle) were too stupid, my sister would tag me under the comment section so I would insult them for her. I mean, it was fun at first. But I got annoyed after a while and told her she needed to learn to insult people herself.