Overview
The Purpose of this Project
April 5th, 2022
This is a sociological study which surveys the rise of the commodification of human companionship, both in online and offline marketplaces.
Inspired by similar studies done by Arlie Russel Hochschild, this study covers a myriad of recounts and interviews which I've collected over the years from both sides of the companion seller market – which includes interviews from both buyers and sellers of commodified companionship. I’m looking to provide a general overview for a number of different “companion-for-hire” services and platforms, so that readers can get a general feel for what kind of of stuff is out there affecting their social landscape.
I’ll be notating the demeanor of each platform and provider along the way, as my aim is to showcase the dispositions of these marketplace entities who have now dedicated themselves to profiteering off of the lonely, disabled, and the dispossessed.
From here, the study follows the incursions of the marketplace into many aspects of intimacy and emotional poverty. Revealing a world where even the most intuitive and emotional of human acts have become commodified, containerized acts – all made “available for purchase”.
From financially-invested parasocial relationships, companion ‘rental’ services, overseas surrogacy farms; to social vanishing services and more . . . the services differ greatly and continue to evolve. But one constant is that they seem to stand as ‘social-shortcuts’; services that encourage a person to potentially skip crucial social-developmental hurdles or avoid uncomfortable social scenarios, simply by paying a fee.
Often times the buyer is allowed to design the entire experience with their provider beforehand – even down to the ways the seller is allowed to react, behave, or respond to certain scenarios the buyer presents. This depends on the service and assumes the seller consents, of course.
This study will also delve into the differences between the regional and cultural backgrounds of both buyers and sellers – as I am also interested in getting a better feel for the variation of intention and motivations behind both parties. I want to better understand what drives buyers to purchase companionship specifically online, and what a sellers’ main intentions are when providing these services.
And though a fair amount of intention is misguided, the results I’ve come across so far have surprised me.
a). The diversity in parasocial relationships within the last 10 years.
b). The behavioral patterns and intents of both buyers and sellers of platonic companion services, as well as a background of their respective sociological environment.
c). The ways in which trading currencies for emotional connection ultimately affects the human psyche; a situation which effectively shortcuts the need to overcome potential social development hurdles or improve one’s self-confidence / social skills.
d). How social customs and ‘Westernization’ of these customs contribute to mass isolation.
e). A look into how some countries have found a seemingly 'genuine' need for certain companionship services, due to their socially-destructive modern work ethic.
f). Providing a frame of social reference where we can more clearly assess how short-term, ‘service-style’ relationships showcase our complete failing as a society to have proper structures in place, to facilitate our emotional well-being as a species.
Context
For many of us, life is lonelier than ever. Despite the ability to connect with countless individuals across thousands of online platforms, we spend so much of our daily lives in places of work, commute or isolation – entirely socially decoupled for many hours per day – that communion becomes a lost art. Reliable intimacy as a whole has become a dwindling experience, so much to the effect that some people feel ‘that intimacy could be made more reliable, if only paid for.’
Whilst living just next door to people we’ve never even spoken to, platonic ‘companion-for-hire’ services have bloomed like weeds in an attempt to fill the perceived void. And much like real weeds, while they do fill the empty spaces in the garden, they promptly drain what vitality remains there.
Since the early 2010s, 'companion-for-hire' services began to bud within the online marketplace – riding parallel with the exponential growth of the modern web at the time. These services range from silly to concerning; with people in all demographics beginning to platonically offer up their own time and attention to anyone willing to pay their fee. It is a business model based upon temporarily extricating vulnerable people from their heavy hearts, their minds, and their wallets.
“No Other Alternative to Loneliness...”
It’s curious to me that a growing portion of societies around the world seem altogether more comfortable and experienced with making a transaction, than they are with holding a casual conversation or functionally greeting people they’ve yet to meet.
Many youths today will tell you that they feel increasingly unprepared to meet new people, or interact on a meaningful social level with others. Ask adults, and they seem to feel that their ability to commune begins to either wither or die just past the age of 22 – specifically in heavily corporate or industrialized countries. Judging by the successes of these companion services, bolstered by the speed with which the internet can 'gratify' you, it's unsurprising that in an age of dispossession more people are choosing to buy in.
This blog’s intent is to showcase the issues of hired companionship, the dangers of financed emotional shortcuts and the social shortcomings therein. To point out areas of life where the lack of social outlet is so acute, it encourages people under specific conditions to reach into their wallet to find companionship and alleviate that pressure.
What does it takes for the human psyche to come to a place where it not only feels compelled to pay for attention, but also forced into a situation where it feels as though there is no other alternative?
Its funny to me that many people worry about some artificial intelligence or robotic uprising in the future that will supersede or take away humanity…
And yet here we are, already paying each other to be cordial.
I think the ship to signal a cause for alarm drifted away well before we had to worry about machines taking over…