So I know that over the next few days it's gonna be extremely hard for me to be able to do anything correctly. As all i'm gonna be able to think of is how to get high again. First it's “I'll bet ya that I dropped a piece over here” and “Oh yea, there has to be a bit that I forgot about in that small pocket thats on my jeans”. If you have gone thru the ending of the most wonderful instant shocks to your brain that make you feel incrediable sort of mind ultering experinces than you know how hard it is to shake that urge is. Tho if you can manage the first week then your almost an 8th thru the same thing again and again from the minute that you wake to the minute that you think your sleep. Thats the only way that I can describe the wanting of something that you can't have but your brain/mind think that you can't live without it. I just did the last of what I think I can find speed wise. Gonna look for another shot maybe find some left over down that can take me to the sleep that I most despirately need.
Hello, I am DTRAIN an Artist, Designer, Idealist, hobo, trailing dishwasher, dog owner, boyfriend, web developer, systems operator, website administrator, LOVER, One Time Felon, Vinyl Record Fiend, Pirate, Wordpress User, Multiple Domain Owner, Own Boss, Drug Abuser and whatever cash wants me to be. I found this written on a piece of paper with another entry dated 4/29/18 on it so I'm thinking it was within a few weeks of this day. It was before I found blizzard and other parts of my life were falling apart. Tho I had another wonderful thing in my life and thats Lexi because I wrote boyfriend and lover in there. She is what I need to remember this week while i'm trying to beat another thing in that list, drug abuser. If I'm ever gonna make something with myself I'm gonna have to knock that shit off because it just over does it on everything else wrong in my life. I have this amazing girl that is on the road to do great things with her life and I don't need to hold her back.
Now it's all starting to make sense I tell myself continusly while my tant, ball sack and butt hole feel like they are on fire after dousing that entire area with Apple Cider Vinager. This became the only way to have what happened to me in the bed five feet behind me. The problem was that my girl friend turns away my throbing hard cock that was being rubbed all over he through my jeans of coarse. Now this was an idea that never has happened in our couple days over two year relationship, that was as you can guess almost completely built apon our two bodies cuming together multiple times a session. Now you can trust me that she knew what she was about to get seconds before she tells me that I have some yeast build up across my beloved tant as her lips were about to make sweet sweet love to my cock. She looks directly into my eyes and says, “Not gonna happen right now sweet cock but we can pick up where we left when I get back house after shift number one.” “Are you kidding me” I yell softly at her try to keep the peace so as she doesn't get all pissed off before work. “Ah, do you want me to get another yeast infection because of some short ten minute speed fueled fuck feast? Thats some super selfish shit going on there... WTF” Lexi replied in some sassy fresh off the boat recan way. (Remember that she your run of the mill country bumcan, who loves this hipsters self loathing completely.llll
I may have slept afew hours yesterday morning when I ate a large bowl of cereal before knodding out on my seat leaning forward not backwards the way that most people would want.
I've been keeping a journal for years now but have been trying to update the way I do this thing for a while now. Tired to start a blog with wordpress but just can't actually get it going for other then a few posts, I think because it just has to much going on. That brings me here on this site where i'm gonna try keep it going.. Enjoy...
I want to introduce my loved ones that keep me in this world.
My Best Friend and Wonderful Lover!@# Lexi.....
My K9 Best Friend, ole big bad and Dumb!@# The Blizz Blazz Himself, Blizzard..
Then there is little sweet forever puppy, Nala.. She is Blizzard's Girlfriend so you already know that she was Lexi's dog before I met her.. Go figure Nala was/is the only dog that Blizzard gets along with.. This picture has the smartest things in my world in it. Both of them..
This is probably a good first post as I have been up all night and the sun is now up in the air.,
Sometimes enough is just enough of this same shit year after year. It bogs my head constantly trying to figure out why does this girl loves me as I'm driving with the Speedometer pinned going as fast as I can down a one-way road to fucking nowhere taking her with me. That's when I need to really start thinking heavy about this lifestyle because it's all good when I'm just dragging myself down the shit hole but I can't take this poor girl with as it's just not fair.