I had a crazy conversation the other day with my son who is becoming a man. He was asking me about my beliefs and the big question was asked, “what is the meaning of life?”

I am actually surprised how easy my answer came out.

I realized afterwards that this isn’t mainstream or the general views of society but it is how I feel.

This is not something I was really taught by my family. It is just what I came to believe over the years based on profound experiences throughout my life.

So here it goes, my thoughts on the meaning of life....

We all come to this life with a purpose.

Our souls come with a clear mission and this is to learn lessons.

We are here to learn, give love and be loved.

We don’t always get it right so we are sent back to give it another go and perhaps work on areas that we could improve on.

Yup, I do believe in past lives.

Our bodies are merely just a shell of who we are in this life.

The soul is the real heart of a person. Looking in the eyes of another will give you a glimps into their soul.

The eyes tell a story.

Have you ever met someone and instantly felt like you came home; as if you have known them your entire life.

This is because you have.

This is our soul recognizing another familiar soul.

This is all part of our plan that we actually help create.

Your child in this life could have been your sister in a past life. Your partner could be a best friend or even a parent from a previous life.

We have input into what our life will be like even before we get here.

The highs and even the lows.

This largely depends on what lessons we are trying to learn along the way.

We also decide with whom we want to live out this life with.

What souls will join us and play a role in this journey?

How will they challenge you?

What will you learn from them?

Life can be hard but just think of the lessons that we take from the darkest times in life.

Your soul is continually evolving each and every experience in your life.

I do believe that we come into this life with a plan but we also have free will and can make changes along the way.

These are the pivotal moments in your life. Trust yourself in these times because you will always make the right decision even if it doesn’t seem that way.

Everything happens as it should!

Have faith.

I am not a big believer in a fear based God who wants to punish us for our sins; however, I believe in an ever loving God that loves us all equally.

This love is far more powerful than anything we have experienced on earth.

God’s love is unconditional and without judgment.

We are not perfect and God forgives us.

We are held accountable for how we lived our life but this isn’t a scary thing.

It’s just part of our process and life is full circle.

We must face how we lived our life even when we thought that no one was looking.

Once our body dies, it is time for our soul to make its journey back to the afterlife.

We are greeted by loved ones, past souls, spirit guides and angels who walk us through this process side by side.

We then get to review our life from our very first breath right until our last.

Every single second of it.

The proud moments.

The mistakes and even your deepest darkest regrets must be faced.

We make mistakes and we are flawed but what we learn from imperfection can be incredibly beautiful.

As we watch our life playback like one long movie. We are also able to experience others feelings and pain.

How did we really impact others?

How did we treat people?

What did you give back during your life?

Did you help others rise up?

Did you kick others down?

Did you lie?

Did you cheat?

What type of friend were you?

Did you love fully?

Did you judge those around you?

I think everyone has to face the music one day and there is no hiding from it. What you put out into this world eventually comes back to you in one way or another.

Once this reviewing period is over you evaluate your life.

Time to identify areas that you still need to learn or haven’t got right just yet.

Then when the time is right, you come back and get another chance at life.

Thanks for reading ❤️

This is easy for me.

None.

I will not celebrate this man regardless of his talent.

I have long believed there was something off with the story of him marrying Soon-Yi.

Who would marry his adopted step-child?

This is wrong on so many levels and yet somehow this was dismissed as a love story similar to one of the plots in many of his twisted movies.

Then it was followed by marriage to make it all okay.

I’m sorry but LOVE for a child of that nature is wrong and illegal.

It will never be okay, period.

This is unacceptable.

Then his younger adopted child disclosed sexual abuse by her father and this to was swept under the rug.

No amount of power, money and fame can make this okay.

I am not interested in being groomed.

The mother portrayed as a jilted fragile ex who coached her child to report abuse as a revenge plot to get back at the man who was sleeping with another one of her children.

WHAT!!! This blows my mind.

I stand by Dylan and Mia Farrow.

I view Soon-Yi as a victim who is still being groomed and manipulated by this predator.

I think much less of anyone public figures who would support or standby this man.

We must judge a person based on their character not just their talent and accomplishments.

In my opinion you cannot separate talent from the core of who a person is.

Shame on them!

If you are curious about this I would encourage you to watch the documentary Woody Allen vs Mia Farrow on HBO.

Thanks for reading ❤️

I would hold my belly and feel your warmth and love growing inside me.

I was in love with you from the second I found out you were created.

I had so many dreams for you and our little family.

Your brother was so excited.

I wanted to name you Madison.

I felt you were a baby girl.

You were my baby girl and I just wanted to hold you and love you.

I needed you to be okay and healthy.

I was desperate to meet you.

I did everything I was suppose to.

I rested.

Ate healthy.

Took my vitamins.

I had you growing inside me for just over 11 weeks and it wasn’t nearly long enough.

We almost made it to the second trimester.

You and me!

This time was precious and I felt blessed and honoured to be your mom.

Then you were gone just like that.

One horrifying instant.

I knew you had left.

A part of me has never been the same since.

I was putting your brother to bed one night.

Lying on his bedroom floor like I always did.

I would caress my stomach and connect to you.

Dream of you and all of our plans together.

This night something was eerily different because when I touched my tummy it was cold.

Your warmth was gone.

Your beautiful loving energy was silent.

I knew I needed to remain strong and wanted so badly to believe I was wrong.

The next morning I was terrified that you were in trouble and I was helpless.

I had no control and I was losing my baby and there was nothing I could do.

I never got to hold your tiny little hands and look into your beautiful eyes.

I never felt your warmth ever again.

I never got to name you.

I never got to burry you.

This all may be true but I promise I have never forgotten you.

You will always be my baby.

You are my baby.

I carry your love with me every single day.

Love your momma ❤️

Thanks for reading

Still I Rise

By Maya Angelou

You may write me down in history

With your bitter, twisted lies,

You may trod me in the very dirt

But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?

Why are you beset with gloom?

’Cause I walk like I've got oil wells

Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,

With the certainty of tides,

Just like hopes springing high,

Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?

Bowed head and lowered eyes?

Shoulders falling down like teardrops,

Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?

Don't you take it awful hard

’Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines

Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,

You may cut me with your eyes,

You may kill me with your hatefulness,

But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?

Does it come as a surprise

That I dance like I've got diamonds

At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame

I rise

Up from a past that’s rooted in pain

I rise

I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,

Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear

I rise

Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear

I rise

Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,

I am the dream and the hope of the slave.

I rise

I rise

I rise.

————————————————————

This is by far one of my favorite poems of all time.

I rise with Maya and all women today and everyday.

Happy National Women’s Day!

Thanks for reading ❤️

I was so impressed with this course and it was online. Really easy to navigate and FREE. I opted to pay a small fee to obtain a certificate but this was not mandatory.

The course is offered from the University of Alberta. What a great way to learn during a time where many of us are eager to keep our minds busy.

Canadian star Dan Levy from Schitt’s Creek, brought some awareness to this course and I was so pumped about it. He is also Eugene Levy’s son, one of my favorite comedians.

I signed up for the course on Coursera and have actually taken a few different courses so far on this site. I need to keep occupied throughout this pandemic and there is only so much Netflix I can handle, this is a healthy alternative.

Thanks for reading ❤️

There is nothing like a homemade thin crust pizza. This is my Friday night “go to” meal. I love that this dough is easy to work with and tastes amazing.

This recipe will make 2 medium size pizzas and easily feeds a family of four.

Ingredients:

1/2 Cup Warm Water

1 tsp Yeast

1 tsp Sugar

1 1/3 Cup Flour

1/2 tsp Salt

Place warm water in a small bowl and add the sugar and yeast. Let it sit for approximately 10 minutes.

Place the flour and salt in a mixer. I use my KitchenAid stand mixer and attach the dough hook.

After the yeast has sat for 10 minutes, pour into the flour mixture and knead with your dough hook on medium speed for 3 -5 minutes. Check the dough and add warm water if needed. You want to have a nice consistency but also not too sticky.

Form into 2 small balls, cover and let rise for 10 minutes.

Preheat oven to 425-450.

Place some flour on your cooking surface and and form your dough by using a rolling pin.

Apply your pizza sauce and toppings.

Cook the pizza for 15 minutes or until golden brown.

Thanks for reading ❤️

My family sure likes a good quality chocolate chip cookie. I have tried dozens of recipes over the years and have finally found a keeper!

The reason why we like these cookies are because not only do they taste good but they are fluffy with the perfect amount of crunch.

Ingredients:

1 Cup Butter (salted and room temperature)

3/4 Cup Brown Sugar

3/4 Cup White Sugar

2 Eggs

1 tsp Vanilla

1 tsp Baking Soda

2 1/2 Cups Flour

1 Pinch of Salt

1 Cup Chocolate Chips

Cream together the butter and sugars in a mixer.

Add in eggs and vanilla until well mixed.

Pour in tha flour, baking soda and salt.

Mix together but do not over mix.

Add chocolate chips and stir in with a spoon by hand.

Preheat oven to 350.

Form cookie dough balls in a pan and cover.

Refrigerate the dough for 30 minutes.

Take out the cookie balls and place on cookie sheets.

Cook for approximately 10 minutes or until golden brown.

Enjoy!

Thanks for reading ❤️

I made a really flavourful and pleasing dish last night so I figured it was worth sharing. I love eating at Browns Socialhouse and due to COVID restrictions eating out has been limited. I have had a craving for my favorite dish at Browns, the Dragon Bowl. I searched online for a copycat version of the meal and came up with a few versions that looked promising. The end results were amazing and I will for sure be making this again.

I would recommend making the yogurt sauce the night before as well as the cabbage mixture. This makes prep time more manageable and allows for the flavours to really set in.

The Day Before

Spicy Yogurt Sauce

3/4 Cup Greek Yogurt

2 Tbsp Red Pepper Flakes

1 Tsp Black Pepper

1/3 Cup Ranch Dressing

Mix together all the above ingredients and cover in a small bowl overnight.

Prep Veggies

1 Green Apple

1 Cup Broccoli

8 Asparagus

1 1/2 Cup Bok Choy

1 Small Head Red Cabbage

4 Green Onions

1/2 Red Onion

1 Yellow Pepper

1 Cup Carrots

Cut up all your veggies. Take your time and cut into bite size pieces. Set aside in prep bowls so they are ready to go for tomorrow when preparing the final dish. Place in refrigerator but leave out the red cabbage, apples and red onions.

Cabbage Mixture

Add 2 Tbsp of Olive Oil in a hot pan. Add in the apples and 1/2 a red onion into the pan and sauté. Add 1/2 cup white vinegar, 1/4 cup water and 1/4 cup brown sugar into the pan on high heat. Once boiling lower heat to a simmer and cover pot. This will simmer for around an hour so that the cabbage is soft and braised.

Cover the cabbage mixture and once cool place in the refrigerate overnight.

The Next Day

Make Basmati Rice

Teriyaki Sauce

1 Cup Water

1/2 Cup Soy Sauce

6 Tbsp Brown Sugar

2 Tbsp Honey

1 Tsp Dried Ginger

1 Garlic Clove Diced

1 Tbsp Cornstarch

Add the above ingredients in saucepan on medium heat until the sauce starts thickening approximately 15 minutes stirring often.

Cut up small pieces of chicken breasts. 4 large breasts in total. Use a wok or skillet and add 2 Tbsp of olive oil. Heat should be medium/high. Stir fry chicken until brown and then add in all your veggies. Pour the teriyaki sauce over everything and continue cooking until complete.

Warm up the cabbage, apples and red onion mixture, that was made the night before. I just used the microwave to warm.

Plate Your Dish

Place a nice serving amount of the Basmati rice.

Add the chicken, veggies and teriyaki sauce mixture.

Lay a generous amount of the cabbage mixture on top.

Finish off by drizzling the spicy yogurt sauce all over.

Now you have a fancy Dragon Bowl Dish and all from the comfort of your own home.

Enjoy

Thanks for reading ❤️

I have often found myself stuck in the past. Seemingly one nightmare after another. I wish I would have done things differently but the truth is I wasn’t ready. I did the best I could, with what I had. SURVIVE and keep going. What other options did I have. I had two little lives depending on me. Stuff down the hurt. The grief, loss and mess. Wipe away those tears. Fake it till you make it. No time to heal or deal.

Keep going. Fight on. After a while you have no idea who your fighting. Your still fighting. Constant chaos. Heart continually racing. Stuck in survival mode. Living in a perpetual state of

fight, flight or freeze. I am full of fight and have a strong will. It’s a curse and a blessing. I just forget to feel. Numb for years. Removed from Real RAW emotions. Three years ago, I couldn’t keep it up. I was vulnerable for the first time in years and I hated it. Trauma is a funny thing, it always comes back if you haven’t healed from it. The feelings hit me like a brick. Memories flooding back. Tears rolled down my face for the first time in years. I had no option but to deal finally and it shook me. I was weak, broken and flawed. I decided this was my time to get things right. The war was over and I needed to sit with things. I felt lazy. I saw myself as weak and fragile. I hated this and was much more comfortable with strong and in charge. I forced myself to sit in silence. It was the hardest challenge I have ever faced. This is when shit got real! So if you are finding yourself exhausted and finally coming out of trauma. Remember that you are not alone. You just came to and are awakening for something so much better. This is confusing but it is healthy and time for you to live your life present and with joy. Regardless of how you handle trauma, you survived and can do anything. If you fought, ran or sat silent, it really doesn’t matter. You did what you had to. What your body prepared you to do from the time you were born. You carried on because you had no other option. Now it’s time to be kind to yourself and heal. I am so proud of you and I promise this is the best part.

Welcome Back!

Thanks for reading ❤️